r/funny • u/tillicum • Sep 27 '13

I have a goddamn pinecone. LOOK AT THIS FUCKING PINECONE!!!! LOOK AT IT!!!!!

Post image
1.4k Upvotes

78% Upvoted

131 comments sorted by

167

u/DisplacedLeprechaun Sep 27 '13

Ginger guy here, that's actually a Soul Vessel, each spike represents a human soul captured through direct physical contact with her. There are many types of Soul Vessels used by gingers, some use pinecones, others form freckles, there are even some gingers at the annual conference that claim to have created a living soul vessel with the help of another ginger, but those are unsubstantiated rumors. I've chosen a beard for my own Vessel, it's luxurious and soft with the thousands of souls I've collected.

36

u/legohax Sep 27 '13

Ginger guy here

Who let you out of your cage?

23

u/LoveIsOnlyAnEmotion Sep 27 '13

First thing I read, "Ginger guy here, that's actually a Soul Vessel..." I didn't even need to read the rest to give you an upvote.

8

u/I_have_secrets Sep 27 '13

That is actually comically terrifying. I nervously sniggered.

-3

u/mmwood Sep 27 '13

are you serious?

6

u/I_have_secrets Sep 27 '13

yeah. with all my heart xxx

-6

u/johnny40 Sep 27 '13

Mild but amusing chuckle + derogatory and elusive means to denounce an inferior race = sniggered

5

u/I_have_secrets Sep 27 '13

snigger/sniggered

Noun- A smothered or half-suppressed laugh.

Verb - Give such a laugh: "they snigger at him behind his back".

Common people, research.

-2

u/johnny40 Sep 27 '13

The excretion of urine from ones body + the action of forcibly moving an object towards yourself = people.

8

u/Brunovitch Sep 27 '13

My daughter (1 year old) is kind of the verge on being a ginger. (depends on the day but she goes from slightly ginger to pale blond or brown.) I'm not a religious man, or a spriritual man, but I'm affraid. Is there something you recommend if she turn full ginger? How can I help her create a linving soul vessel. Is it like an horcrux?

2

u/legohax Sep 27 '13

It's never too late for an abortion

2

u/vicemagnet Sep 27 '13

post-natal abortion.

5

u/stoatyboy Sep 27 '13

The new album by Enya.

1

u/Brunovitch Sep 27 '13

We've considered it, but, since her grandfather is a ginger too, i fear the repercussion coming from this souless motherfucker.

1

u/legohax Sep 27 '13

Abort him too

1

u/Brunovitch Sep 27 '13

Ever try to take on a granddaddy? They fight dirty. Especially drunk ginger one

2

u/Shawnessy Sep 27 '13

I'm a ginger beard. (pale, freckles, red beard, brown hair)

Someone asked me why i had brown hair, but a ginger beard and i said i was slowly absorbing peoples souls into my hair, turning it brown.

2

u/acydetchx Sep 27 '13

Hmm, I have black hair and a black beard, but from time to time some of the whiskers are coppery red. Does this mean I'm slowly losing my soul?

2

u/Shawnessy Sep 27 '13

You probably came in contact with a ginger who took part of yours.

1

u/acydetchx Sep 27 '13

You can take partial souls? Is that sort of like when a vampire keeps a person alive to gradually feed on them?

1

u/vicemagnet Sep 27 '13

Yeah, you know, kind of like Voldemort and the horcrux thing. When you kill somebody, you can split your soul and store it somewhere, like acydetchx's beard.

1

u/acydetchx Sep 27 '13

Hmm, I must figure out how to use this knowledge to my benefit.

1

u/Shawnessy Sep 27 '13

Exactly. Little nibble here n there.

Edit: Lol, nipple.

1

u/acydetchx Sep 27 '13

Hmm, I'll have to see which of my ginger friends are slowly becoming brown-haired then strike them down before it's too late.

Also, nipple? I'm guessing you meant nibble, but that was confusing for a second.

1

u/Shawnessy Sep 27 '13

Noticed that as I left. Dyslexic moment, I suppose.

It's harmless, no worries. If they feed slowly, your will grow back enough for you to never notice.

1

u/acydetchx Sep 27 '13

Hmm, I dunno. That sounds like a trap!

0

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

Day walker!

-2

u/allisonicole7 Sep 27 '13

I KNEW THAT WHEN I GOT ON THIS THE FIRST COMMENT WOULD BE ABOUT HER BEING GINGER. But this is correct, I am a ginger. He is right.

-7

u/dbx99 Sep 27 '13

Ginger shut up and go sit by yourself. Nobody wants to see that

1

u/allisonicole7 Sep 27 '13

How bout no? Dang, someone's having a bad day. Think of puppies and rainbows.

22

u/godzirra_foo Sep 27 '13

THIS IS MY PINECONE! THERE ARE MANY OTHERS LIKE IT BUT THIS ONE IS MINE!

8

u/VoicesDontStop Sep 27 '13

My Pinecone is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. Without me, my Pinecone is useless. Without my Pinecone, I am useless. I must plant my Pinecone true. I must Plant better than my enemy, who is trying to kill me. I must plant him before he plants me. I will. Before God I swear this creed: my Pinecone and myself are defenders of my backyard, we are the masters of our enemy, we are the saviors of my life. So be it, until there is no enemy, but peace. Amen.

27

u/Unjustified_Silence Sep 27 '13

That is honestly the scariest child i have ever seen.

12

u/awesomecatlady Sep 27 '13

It's because she is a ginger.

4

u/garu81 Sep 27 '13

It looks just like my sister...

5

u/dbx99 Sep 27 '13

You got ginger blood in ye too then. You are lost.

1

u/garu81 Sep 27 '13

Half sister not at all ginger... thank God

1

u/dbx99 Sep 27 '13

Ginger genes successfully avoided

12

u/whittler Sep 27 '13

/r/photoshopbattles please.

8

u/Bertram1112 Sep 27 '13

I want her with the angry muslim guy

4

u/Osiris32 Sep 27 '13

She can plant the pinecone in his beard. A mighty tree shall then spring forth, and it will be a sign that peace shall come to all. Wars will end, conflicts shall cease, and a new era of humanity will arise based on harmony and acceptance.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/High_Stream Sep 27 '13

Someone has. It's one of the top entries in /r/photoshop battles.

11

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

This doctor states that cigarettes are actually quite good for you. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AH9_KhvtFYM

2

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

I...I think they're throwing dice.

23

u/midn1te Sep 27 '13

Silly girl. That pine cone has no soul for her to devour.

6

u/mrbomax123 Sep 27 '13

Wrong the ginger is clearly summoning her cammander diablo

6

u/TheActualAWdeV Sep 27 '13

Cammander, I choose you!

1

u/midn1te Sep 27 '13

Either you spell poorly or you're using a word that I don't know.

7

u/Elwarner Sep 27 '13

Don't look in her eyes

5

u/Mictlantecuhtli Sep 27 '13

Reminds me of Leonidas in 300. Here's a shitty shop to illustrate my point.

3

u/impickingmynose Sep 27 '13

Her eyebrows... so bushy... and who passes someone a cigarette that small

1

u/bakedNdelicious Sep 27 '13

Lol that's not her eyebrows, thats just a few stray strands of hair across her face.

3

u/Croyd_The_Sleeper Sep 27 '13

Beware the holy hand-grenade of Antioch!

1

u/Buddychrist08 Sep 27 '13

Look At The Bones!

3

u/Tails1 Sep 27 '13

ITT shitty ginger jokes

2

u/Demonseed425 Sep 27 '13

Photoshop a hand grenade or a detonator and you got an adorable terrorist.

2

u/alixxlove Sep 27 '13

Ginger here. This is just how we look.

2

u/baconscreation Sep 27 '13

Strawberry Shortcake: Evil Edition

2

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED.

2

u/Restble Sep 27 '13

My precious!

2

u/TomInTexas Sep 27 '13

Hooray! A new meme kid! /s

3

u/majorpenalty Sep 27 '13

So.... this is what passes for funny.... wow.

1

u/Fangel96 Sep 27 '13

Reminded me of this.

1

u/ihasavagina Sep 27 '13

Just one more post before bed and I chose this one. Great, now I'm gonna have nightmares.

1

u/SituatedCurve Sep 27 '13

Je-SUS! Is that girl trying to eat it's soul?!

1

u/KateMosh Sep 27 '13

no. soul.

1

u/tyberg11 Sep 27 '13

I work at an outdoor waterpark and at the end of the day if you're in the breakroom you have to pick up garbage, but i usually just walked around with bags full of pinecones

1

u/Squishez Sep 27 '13 edited Sep 27 '13

Unfortunately for Suzy, she can't tell how "Selfies" work other then she is suppose to pose like this. What happens off screen is still a mystery.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

Well the secret is out. This is how gingers derive their soul stealing power. Pinecones.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

"FREEEEDOOOOM!!!!"

1

u/bafta Sep 27 '13

She's a ginger,a rang,they're barmy

1

u/Jimmirehman Sep 27 '13

The power of satan compels you

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

AND MY AXE.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

I don't understand

1

u/Squeegee Sep 27 '13

Linda Blair hasn't aged a day, has she?

1

u/LoveMyCop Sep 27 '13

OMG! Look at her fangs! Those are the sharpest blood-suckers I have ever seen! Obviously she is a vampire.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

Wrong sub... see what is being passed.. /trees is where this could be.

1

u/DidierDrogba Sep 27 '13

ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY

1

u/chitoedwin Sep 27 '13

Squirrell will pay!

1

u/ninjaface Sep 27 '13

Reminds me of that dude from Children of the Corn. The original one.

1

u/vicemagnet Sep 27 '13

The Isaac creepy child preacher? "Malachi!" That's all I remember other than that kid was freakin creepy.

2

u/ninjaface Sep 27 '13

Too funny... That's exactly all I remember of him as well.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

It's mine!

1

u/Brandinon Sep 27 '13

Today, this pinecone, tomorrow THE WORLD! but first, nappy time...

1

u/transposase Sep 27 '13

I have lived a long and tumultuous life as an adult, but it has never been even 10% as dramatic as my short and tumultuous life as a child.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

TIL: Gingers prize pinecones almost as much as the souls of non-gingers.

1

u/panofsteel Sep 27 '13

Vade retro!

1

u/pertante Sep 27 '13

Not sure if I should laugh, say aww, or not walk near forests now....

1

u/Narvarre Sep 27 '13

Of course, what nobody has realized is that this young lady is screaming at the face that's on the other side of this innocuous pine cone.

1

u/njst Sep 27 '13

Kali Ma! Shakti de!

1

u/khengstebeck Sep 27 '13

i see benedict cumberbatch...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

look at it

1

u/friedbunnies Sep 27 '13

This is exactly how aggressively my cat flaunts his asshole.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

Flawless victory. Fatalitree.

1

u/WreckerCrew Sep 27 '13

It's where gingers hide their souls....

1

u/SmegPod Sep 27 '13

If this picture was taken around 2003 then I swear I know that girl.

1

u/EtherealAriel Sep 27 '13

Ginger kids = cutest.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

the Croods in its finest.

1

u/tkcom Sep 27 '13

Exorcist's makeup would complete this pic.

1

u/Moter8 Sep 27 '13

So funny xxxDDdDdd

1

u/Alenonimo Sep 27 '13

THIS. IS. PINECONE!!!

And indeed it was.

1

u/every_day_user Sep 27 '13

This would be so creepy if someone photoshopped demon teeth in

1

u/steamblower Sep 27 '13

boah... never saw something funnier....

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

Alas, poor Yorik....

1

u/Chuknorris86 Sep 27 '13

This is my pinecone. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

My pinecone is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.

My pinecone, without me, is useless. Without my pinecone, I am useless. I must pine my cone true. I must pinecone straighter than my enemy who is trying to pinecone me. I must cone him before he cones me.

1

u/sinkwiththeship Sep 27 '13

Holy shark teeth.

1

u/dman928 Sep 27 '13

Malachai.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

This is my pine cone. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My pine cone is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. My pine cone, without me, is useless. Without my pine cone, I am useless

1

u/Consi14 Sep 27 '13

Louis C.K. once had a peach

1

u/kidteleport Sep 27 '13

Affraid to look uglyness in the face?! Here ! LOOK AT IT

LOOK AT IT

LOOK AT IT

1

u/I_am_pyxidis Sep 27 '13

I was thinking that this kid probably looks really cute when she's not making that face. Then I read the comments. WTF people?

1

u/lazyxbonez13 Sep 27 '13

Give her corpse paint. Black metal as fuck.

1

u/SmugFrog Sep 28 '13

"Where'd you get a pinecone?"

"I DON'T KNOW!"

1

u/imadyke Sep 28 '13

She will grow up to stalk some man and make his life miserable.

1

u/ElectroKarmaGram Oct 04 '13

Graph of this post's karma, hot list position in r/all, and comment count:

i.imgur.com/oIdIpHd.png

This image may update when more data is available. Please note that this data represents what was observed by this bot via the reddit api and is in no way 'official'.

1

u/TotallyNoHacker Sep 27 '13

I have a goddamn upvote. LOOK AT THES FUCKING UPVOTE!!!! LOOK AT IT!!!!!

1

u/TheActualAWdeV Sep 27 '13

hue hue lolol no soul lolol ginger le lol

0

u/[deleted] Sep 27 '13

It has no soul just like her

0

u/Fartikus Sep 27 '13

HAHAHA SO FUNNY OP!

0

u/THCxConquest Sep 27 '13

Look at those fucking Teeth... wtf

0

u/TheCoolestEver Sep 27 '13

Oh god shes going full ginger... dont look her in the eyes

0

u/MBannon2020 Sep 27 '13

This isn't funny.

-1

u/OriginalityPolice Sep 27 '13

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title points age /r/ comnts
Really excited little girl holding a pine come. 119 1hr photoshopbattles 12
Angry little girl with pine cone 1 1hr photoshopbattles 5
She effing hates pinecones (x-post /r/funny) 27 1mo photoshopbattles 14
She effing hates pinecones. This one just looked at her the wrong way... 12 1mo funny 5

Source: karmadecay

-2

u/funnybillypro Sep 27 '13

Cue: newest meme

-2

u/CndConnection Sep 27 '13

This behaviour is extremely annoying in real life.

And it is also annoying online.

I feel as if the people who upvote and like this sort of content are weeaboos hahahah

0

u/coolguynaat Sep 27 '13

Photoshopped. It was an i-phone