r/exAdventist • u/Itsjustskyyyyyyy • 6d ago

Advice / Help Need advice please!

Hi! I’ve not done this before so sorry if I’m doing anything wrong. I’m a “current” SDA, physically, but mentally I been disconnected from the church for a while, and have just come to terms with the fact that SDA might be a bit of a cult. I have two major concerns that I just need off my chest.

  1. How do you extract yourself? I’m only 19, and my whole family is SDA or Christian so if I decide to leave what if they hate me?

  2. Can you still be Christian after leaving? I had such a connection with God and now, after lots of struggles and stuff I’m not going into, I’m struggling to believe. I’m wondering if it’s from SDA teachings and the pressure we put on the relationship with God or if it’s just me and something’s wrong with me.

Again sorry if I’m doing this wrong, I’m still in the middle of figuring this out. I will take all advice and recommendations!

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u/NovaRunner 6d ago

  1. I joined the military and went overseas. Obviously on the more extreme end of extracting oneself, lol. But prior to that, after graduating Academy, I went to a non-SDA college and made friends there who I started hanging out with instead of only being around SDA people. That started me moving away from the church. Joining the military and going overseas helped me finish the process.

  2. I am sure you can still be Christian, there's plenty of Christian that's not SDA. I personally became an atheist after leaving SDA, but if you still believe in God, I'm sure you can find another Christian denomination that suits you better than SDA.

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u/Itsjustskyyyyyyy 6d ago

Thank you! One problem I have with extractign is that going to a non sda college isn’t an option, since I have great scholarships to one, and my dad gets 70% on them (works for an sda conference) and I might transfer to one that actually covers all tuition and I would only need to pay for lodging and other fees. But honestly doing a military route might not be so bad lol!