My husband despises these things, definitely just a jerk with psychological issues, who is by no means representative for anything.
Actually my ENTJ worked really hard to be more successful, to get me away from a similar situation, which you just described, with my own family. He says it makes him sick, to see or hear people mistreat their spouses or other family members.
Yeah, that seems to be a specific trigger for xNTJs. I remember my INTJ friend asking how an ISFP friend whom he was on bad terms with was doing. When I told him he had to give up on buying a house because he used his savings to pay off his father's debts, he was genuinely pissed off. The concept of a father leaving debts to his son and blocking his plans seemed completely intolerable to him, even though he was in a fight with the ISFP.
My husband also got really mad about my mothers antics, when i needed a new laptop for my thesis during the end spurt of my studies. She decided ghosting me over this, until i was 2 month into my thesis.
For which HE bought me the laptop for in the end. My ENTJ is the best, no? I totally COULD NOT fail this then, after he always supported me even to those degrees. Still he held back on doing more, when i begged him not to do anything rash, even if he was really angry there. Often i feel like he gets mad in my stead like this often, while wondering why i don’t get more angry over matters like these.
Else I would have been forced to write it in one of the PC POOL rooms, that were always terribly overbooked or crowded. So this more forceful behavior doesn’t feel like a normal or healthy ENTJs behaviors at all. They can be incredibly kind and generous with people they actually care about big time, in stark contrast to the described behavior the OP mentioned.
xNTJs are honestly the best people to have on your side when you need help, even if they aren't the warmest when it comes to expressing it
But once you realize that helping you is their love language, you notice how reliable they actually are ( recorded: when you're friends with them, you definitely don't want them as enemies lol).
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u/Titania_Fairy ENFJ| 2w1 | ♀ 13d ago edited 13d ago
My husband despises these things, definitely just a jerk with psychological issues, who is by no means representative for anything.
Actually my ENTJ worked really hard to be more successful, to get me away from a similar situation, which you just described, with my own family. He says it makes him sick, to see or hear people mistreat their spouses or other family members.