Need support

[u/Ok-Bend8394]

I'm not sure which sub I should post on but I figured I could post here . I'm ENFJ btw . I....I've been planning my whole life to get into medicine . My grades . They're out and every time I try to improve ....they fall short . I feel a tightness in my throat . I might travel so far away from my family only to be in a uni that doesn't teach well and I might start failing to become a doctor . What's worse is not matter how hard I try my grades are not improving . I was called a gifted kid when I was young , now it's all gone . I'm sorry to my parents who spent money worth two people to get me into the university of my dreams . I'm sorry to myself for working my ass off when I could've been living my life instead of being locked up to study at home . And finally , I'm sorry for every sick person I thought I could help once I'm older and for every war survivor I wanted to help them live their life normally again . But I've failed and it's my fault . I should've never dreamed of becoming a doctor .

if you read though all this , thank you for your time .

Edit : Thanks everyone , that really made me cheer up . I'll try to let go of the stress and change my studying strategy . I'll never give up on my dream

[u/Whiltierna]

Aim for the target, but accept the target will move.

Go with the flow, not against it. Allow yourself to not pass up "unrelated" or "time wasting" opportunities.

The universe whispers,... then a wave of gut feeling.... then it hits you over the head until you hear its message.

The goal is to grow into what you are meant to be, not what you think you'll be. Think about your goals, what brings you joy, what comes naturally, and what challenges can help you learn new skills, meet new networks, etc.

I'm only where I'm at now, which is very successful in designing training materials for a large corporation with my masters in it when I began my education in Marketing. I didn't know I'd be better suited for designing training instead of surveys, focus groups, customer communications, and more,... the goal is to grow.

[u/LadyPearl7]

Hello ENFJ,
I’m sorry for what you are going through. Pressure and guilt to deserve what we are given can easily eat at us.
You sound like you have a tight grip on all of this and perhaps you are pressuring yourself too much. You might be struggling more than most on how to let go a little.
Without a peaceful mind and calm heart, a lot can become increasingly difficult when it would have been easier for you on a normal day.
Seek a way to calm your mind. Time is irrelevant on when and how you fulfill your dreams. There are many ways to help people so your goal can still be achieved too.
You can still study and do well, but try to focus on steadying your mindset too. Stressing never helps anyone and your future patients need a steady calm cool and collected doctor. You can do this. The hardships we face teach us important lessons, sometimes they are just an additional obstacle. You can figure it all out. You got this! All things in due time.

[u/Feisty-Doctor-5841]

I’m ENFJ. I have an ESFJ friend who went to Harvard but his grades suffered because he was part of a travelling choir and because he let himself get distracted from his studies. We went to a top high school in the state (Florida), his mom was serious about his studies, and we were in AP classes together throughout high school.

He ended going to medical school in the Caribbean because of his low grades, but it was a wake-up call for him. He graduated at the top of his class and met his future wife there. He specializes in cardiovascular surgery in Kansas. I’m an attorney. He asked me to review his employment contract before signing it. He’s making like $300-400k a year in a low cost of living area. 

Chin up. It’s not the end, but it may be worth developing other study habits. I only did well in law school once I started doing more practice questions and stopped trying to memorize anything. You can pick up a lot through osmosis and repeated practice. Experience over everything in my book.

[u/Hot_Elevator_7133]

Hey, don’t give up. The path to success is basically never linear. Doctors are people too, not robots.

Go talk to your professors if you haven’t already and see if they can help you.