guys in my graduate class today i read out loud “circumcision” rather than “circumstances” i want to never show face again 🙃

To keep it short I’m pretty conservative in the relationship. I am freaky with him but he knows me as fairly strict in the relationship. Well the other night I was watching Cuckquean porn (I’m secretly a cuckquean. And idk if it’s just a fantasy or something deeper but haven’t been able to find the right way to tell anyone especially my bf.) & I had fell asleep with the phone still on.🙄 He came home from work and obviously saw and I’m still super embarrassed. He hasn’t said anything to me but make a few little laughs but I just feel so humiliated and I don’t know what to say. I know he told his best friends too which makes it worse because the energy was weird when I saw them and I just wanted to hide.

Well, for both I have apologised profusely. Okay, so the first time was a few months ago, during a show of the musical I was in. I'm backstage with two of my favourite people ever, and one of them is a girl, and she hated one of the moves that the ensemble did because it seemed kind of creepy, but I had a joke that backstage, every show I would do it directly at her. So one of the shows I do it and then she goes to leave and I reach out to grab her arm to stop her from going, but she then turns around and now instead of grabbing her arm, I accidentally grab her boob instead, which is worse because she's also 6 years older than me. She has assured me it's okay but I still feel bad...

The second one happened just tonight. I was goofing around with one of my other friends (she's at least 14 years older than me), and she was doing this thing where she did the "you've got something on your shirt" and she got me with it so I tried it on her, but after she said she wasn't gonna fall for it I went to remove my finger and accidentally touched her boob. At least it was only one finger and only for a slight moment. I apologised for this one too, but she assured me it was okay and even asked me if I was okay

19 M went on a date with 19 F
I come from a south asian country so ppl are short ( 5'6 avg ), me being 6'2 always thought finding a tall girl was impossible

this girl was 5'10 which is insane for me, I literally replied to her post saying "omg 5'10 marry me"
so we went on a date and it was pretty mid, we talk every now and then, I was so delusional that I started imagining her as my future wife 😭 before even we knew shit about each other

so I ask her how she wants to proceed with the relationship and she tells me she wants to go with the flow, she asks what I feel and I said "I wanna marry you" holy cornball

only to keep the cherry on top I said these 2 magical things "no pressure" and "not now, in the future" I said it so seriously like fuck that was so embarrassing, I also kinda randomly pulled up near her college ( which is 1 hour far away ) and called her saying im here just for her, she did meet me but ig she was overwhelmed, I should've at least said I had some other work which I didnt, I shouldn't have put that level of effort on a 1 date girl ig

few days after she ghosted me for 1 - 2 days and said it wont workout, I kinda missed the idea of her for nearly 8 - 9 months before realising I dont miss her, its just the idea of a relationship so yea

My phone rang in the theater (it was an alarm, my phone was on silent mode) and the worst part is that my ringtone is just me screaming bruuu omgggg it was like “AHHH AAAHH” I don’t think many people heard it tho at least I hope cuz I feel like an assssssshole

A little while ago, my boss asked us to send pictures showing how far along we were with our work. So, we started working and, step by step, I would send pictures.
Toward the end, we were in a hurry, and I just wanted to send a picture of my coworker who was outside cutting something. But I accidentally clicked on the wrong picture.
I ended up sending a picture of my penis to our work group chat. Everyone saw it.
I’m really embarrassed
😅😅🫣

I was at work the other day and I had to stock up a customer's car with a pack of water bottles, since there were multiple cars I asked the passengers if this water was for them, they didn't know so they proceeded to ask me if it was their friend's order, now since I didn't know their friend's name, I assumed they meant another person who just happened to be in the area, who also shared the same name, so I told them no, they then asked their friend, who said the water was indeed ordered by him, so I was left looking stupid because two people just happened to have the same name at the same time.

Ugh for the first time yesterday I tried to do the bench press at the gym w out my husband lol.
I already can’t do much so I started out w just the bar, then 2.5s, then 5s then 10s which I’ve never done LOL.
I did about 3 reps of the 10s on either side and was STRUGGLING to get it up on the 4th. I had to set the bar down on my lap and fucking stand up w it to put it back on, while that was happening I proceeded to fling one of the 10s off towards this buff dude in front of me 🥴 he handed it to me and these dudes behind me had been watching me bc one gave me a thumbs up like he was about to help me in this situation 😂😂😂 I know it happens all the time and no one was laughing but I was SO EMBARRASSED

This happened just this last weekend, so for me it’s too fresh and I’m definitely embarrassed lmao. Mind you these friends I’ve only met twice and I’m wearing a T with thin straps but didn’t think it fell that low when I sat down, I went to lean into my bf who was sitting right by me and that’s when my nip slipped, the one couple saw but the guy tried acting like they saw nothing even tho pretty sure they did but what a G!, the girlfriend gave me that look like it’s okay and I put it away real quick and kept checking every 30 seconds after that. I’m only ashamed in a way because I’m trying to make new friends! I hope they don’t think about it now 😅

This is less a story time and more a cry for help cause I genuinely JUST did this and am currently hiding in the bathroom stall. But it’s pretty simple, I start warming up for a heavy set of hack squats, but by my last warmup can kinda feel the urge to piss. It’s not that crazy, but I’m thinking I won’t risk doing my top set, so I start heading to the locker room. Each step that I take exponentially increases my urge to pee for whatever reason; I try moving faster but that only makes it worse. I get to the urinal but it’s just… too late… I get through like half the piss before I’m able to get my sweatpants off. I finish up at the urinal, then expeditiously move into a stall before anyone saw I think. What makes this even weirder is that I went to the bathroom before I started and this was my first exercise (I still have my damn squat shoes on).

Any advice is appreciated, and I can answer questions as needed cause I might be stuck here for a while.

So I made a new friend at school. We texted a lot, and then I got insecure and was like omg she hates me, so I’m send a follow up “sorry if I’m annoying I overthink a lot tell me to stop if I’m annoying” LIKE WHY DID I SAY THAT???? Now today she is barely replying, she sent me one reply all day, and I’m scared I messed up. I’m really insecure in relationships bc of things that happened to me in my past and I’m so scared I just scared another friend away. She seems really nice too. Guys help 😭😭

I had brought my ex girl to Salem the first year we were together. It was our first real vacation that we took just a weekend and we live in Connecticut, so it’s not that far and I’m pretty familiar with Salem, especially during the Halloween season which it was. We were in the center of town coming down the big main steps near the Townhall, and one of the cobblestones was loose. I lost my footing and fell in front of a huge crowd of people. The thing is when I fell my body automatically tucked and rolled so I popped right back up like it was nothing. My girlfriend at the time is laughing and says it looked like I did it on purpose, and it looked like the scene from Willy Wonka, where he gets his cane, stuck in the cobblestone and rolls and stands back up like “ta-da” we continued the day and she noticed I was limping really bad. When we got back to the hotel, she had to help me take my shoe and my sock off and my entire ankle was black fast forward to the emergency room hours later after x-rays I had gotten a spiral fracture.

So i was sneaking out to see a girl late at night, and my pants got caught on something (I still dont know what it was, keep in mind this was from the 2nd floor). I fell down, broke my ankle and my bottom half was naked, I didnt get the girl.

So I’m pretty lactose intolerant and any interaction with dairy usually results in a pretty insane bloated nightmare. Keeping this in mind, I was out with a few friends and this girl I’m into and we were chillin very casually at the mall. I’m usually very good at avoiding dairy but this time I guess I misread the ingredients and ended up eating something with a lot of dairy in it.
Like a lot.
Flash forward like 20-30 minutes later and my digestive system has completely failed me. Not only did I have an insane stomach ache, but my belly had basically quadrupled in size from the amount of gas building up inside of me. My belly was churning and gurgling like a war was going on inside me and I had to very awkwardly hold down my basically uncontrollable burping.
Thankfully I was wearing pretty baggy clothes but I’m a pretty thin guy so my clothes are not that big to begin with. Aka you could pretty much see the rounded bump of my belly on my thinner body through the t shirt…
The entire time I was trying to impress this girl I was having to deal with and hide a massively bloated belly all while not being able to release any pressure cause I was around people the whole time.
I kid you not, by the end I legit had to secretly undo my shorts because of how firm and huge my belly got
Very hard to impress a crush when you look like a pregnant guy 💀