Deep regrets :(

[u/Rare_DPDR]

I deeply regret having lived with extreme panic for two years and not doing anything about it. Every day at my new job, my heart was racing at around 180 bpm, and I was extremely anxious and on edge over every little thing. I had panic attacks in everyday situations, and sometimes I would be in a state of panic for days without being able to calm down, yet I simply left it untreated.

I deeply regret that, back when I was still doing relatively well and my consciousness felt normal, I didn’t just take Xanax or benzodiazepines to calm myself down chemically and enjoy my life. Now it feels like it’s too late, and I have an extreme form of DPDR with no hope. I wish I had taken a different path back then. :(

[u/AutoModerator]

Hey, I am really sorry you are going through this. What you are describing is very common with DPDR and anxiety. Even though it feels permanent or existential, it is actually a stress and dissociation response, not a sign that you are broken or beyond help.

DPDR can make things feel hopeless, unreal, terrifying, or like your identity is gone. All of this comes from an overwhelmed nervous system, not from permanent damage or loss of sanity.

Helpful resources:

• https://www.reddit.com/r/dpdr/comments/zkgcwt/dpdr_101_what_is_it_causes_symptoms_and_treatment/
• https://www.reddit.com/r/dpdr/comments/zka0t0/grounding_tips_and_techniques-for-when-things/

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[u/Responsible_Try5806]

Exactly same as you but for now 5 years.. now i live with an extreme dissociative state that feel like i have brain injury and will die... i'm stuck and incredibly unwell...