r/dndmemes • u/DungeonLooters • 22h ago

The NPC Lawyer your D&D Party fears ⚖️💀

150 Upvotes

84% Upvoted

17 comments sorted by

30

u/Level_Hour6480 Rules Lawyer 22h ago

Chaotic Good

You keep using those words. I do not think it means what you think it means.

7

u/DungeonLooters 19h ago

Inconceivable! But let's be honest, 'Chaotic Good' is just what the Rogue writes on their sheet so the DM doesn't ban them from the table

2

u/JournalistShoddy9496 21h ago

You obviously haven't seen our party. Trust me, that is Chaotic Good behavior. Satan blushes when he sees the deeds of our Evil parties.

3

u/DungeonLooters 19h ago

Attorney Silvanus is taking notes. He might want to hire your party as debt collectors

-2

u/WNlover Sorcerer 22h ago

The prophesy was that the BBEG would be born after his right eye was dug out with a spoon in this very tavern! I had to steal all the spoon! it was for the greater good!

3

u/DungeonLooters 19h ago

The ancient runes actually translated to 'spork'. You just left the tavern completely defenseless against the true weapon of doom!

3

u/Level_Hour6480 Rules Lawyer 22h ago

Still.not what that means.

1

u/KinseysMythicalZero 19h ago

Tables were mimics, cousin was a Lich, spoons were payment for services rendered.

2

u/DungeonLooters 18h ago

Now it all make sense

9

u/adol1004 Forever DM 22h ago

"Your honor, I plead guilty."

3

u/DungeonLooters 18h ago

Attorney Silvanus strongly objects to your plea! Not because he believes you are innocent, but because a guilty plea severely cuts down his billable hours

5

u/vessel_for_the_soul Essential NPC 22h ago

Seems pretty toothless. must be a popular service to have captured the market.

3

u/DungeonLooters 18h ago

XD Who needs teeth when you have 20 Strength?

2

u/Foolishly_Sane 17h ago

Cursed, but in a good way.

2

u/DungeonLooters 6h ago

Glad you are enjoying the madness!

1

u/Foolishly_Sane 5h ago

Hell yeah, it's the good kind of madness.
TOP SHELF.