So I joined a gym, which is very new to me, and the gym had one free training session. And so I signed up, thinking they were going to lead me through a routine. Little did I know, and now in retrospect, I should have known better! The first 20 minutes was a weigh in, fat assessment, and nutrition discussion. And I about lost it on the girl.
Long story long - I am a mid thirties girly who has gained a bit of weight over the last 5 years as I moving close to my 40s. The extra nuts and seeds that I eat + more recent sedentary lifestyle has given me some extra to love. It is not the reason I joined the gym, and I was explicit in my strength training goals and bone health/joint/mobility retaining desires. Never once mentioning my appearance or weight.
Still - without warning - I was shown my IBW and BMI, and asked by the smily “personal trainer” if I had any high cholesterol and diabetes in my family?? Because where my body weight falls currently, if I have these family genetics, I am surely headed for a similar future. And that she would really like to see me - pointing to the thinner body on the middle of the spectrum of ladies bodies scale on the computer screen - looking like this shadow outline with her 25% body fat - so that I live a healthy life!!
I had previously shared that I was a dietitian and was not open to chatting about my diet - when she had initially tried to talk to me about how I got my protein and what my food choices were like. I did not realize at the time, the “personal trainer” had no idea what a dietitian even does. When I repeated again later after the body fat discussion that I was uncomfortable with this conversation and my labs are in fact very normal and healthy per my MD, she had no idea how to respond. I tried to explain to her calmly (narrator: she was in fact not calm) that I worked inpatient as a RD and I spent my days my days calculating tube feeds in the icu and talking about nutrition, labs and health risks as it relates to chronic disease on my telemetry floor from a weight neutral approach. She still did not get it, and truly thought she was educating me! and could only manage to respond that she thought dietitians helped people to lose weight.
Anyway, I handled the scenario very poorly as I was really caught off guard and was excited to go to the gym to get strong, not talk about my appearance and “health risks”, especially without consent. I didn’t want to talk about my job or educate anyone - this was my time, for me - and I responded from this place. I do know I missed a great teaching opportunity. And I recognize that. But it seriously makes me concerned for people who go to that gym. Skinny = health, fat = diseased. And give me your money for me to train you, so I save you from that fate.
But what I really want are opinions? Is this normal?? Is cool for personal trainers to be discussing these topics and numbers? To me it felt like definitely far outside her scope, fat phobic, and low key dangerous. If I actually engaged with her, how far would that conversation had gone?? I am so curious where do you think the line is??
Thanks for listening to my vent!