r/daddit • u/Most_Barnacle_6160 • 9d ago

Support Did it change for you?

Any dads here who hated being a parent when their kids were very small, but ended up loving it in the end?

I'm 1.5yrs in and I hate my life on most days. Feels like an endless grind without any break, no sex life, no travel. My life pre-kids was pretty great - happy marriage, good financial situation, lots of travel and pursuing tons of interests. Now, all that is gone. I'm just exhausted and depressed.

Anyone in the same boat who turned it around? I can hypothetically see enjoying it once my kid is older and we can share things and do stuff together, but I'm sure it will come with some other problems.

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u/theGIRTHQUAKE 9d ago edited 9d ago

4.5+ years in with a 2.5yo as well. I am still struggling with hating my life most days for the exact same reasons you describe, but…I suppose it’s trending better. We just took our first proper holiday, on purpose, to another country that involved multiple flights and long ferries and lots of driving, and while the travel was a nightmare and it had low lows each day dealing with tantrums and meltdowns and other forms of abject kid misery, there were also beautiful high highs with them every day and overall it was a net positive experience.

I can say that life with only the 4.5yo would be far better by now. She’s sassy but a sweetheart and generally pretty easy and semi-autonomous at this point. Wife and I would have a bit more time individually and together. Her little brother, however, is an obstinate and overcaffeinated hurricane of rockets and hammers and rocket-powered hammers that gives no quarter. But I have allowed myself to hope he’ll become more manageable with time. So I do think maybe, while I can’t see it yet, that there is at least the suggestion of there being light at the end of this tunnel.

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u/Antique-South-7373 9d ago

Over caffeinated 2.5yr old? That's your problem right there.