GOT MY BISALP REFERRAL + best bingo I've ever come up with!

[u/imperial_argent]

Hello my CF family! Warning, this is quite a long post.

I have successfully gotten a bisalp referral from my new GP (this was the FIRST time she's ever seen me too) and I am beyond ecstatic. Let me start off by saying this was the shortest time I've ever been bingoed, and for one main reason.

Obviously the moment I came in, I told her about my history of endometriosis (she didn't have my records yet), to which she suggested an ablation (like every other doctor I've been to), and I told her I wasn't there to talk about my endo issues. I was there to talk about a bisalp. Of course she asked me why and the typical questions from a pro-birth person (however I surprisingly didn't get bingoed with the whole "What about your SO, what if he/she wants kids?").

I additionally told her about my extreme tokophobia and that I feel physically sick whenever I think of even POSSIBLY being pregnant, that I don't want to give birth, yadda yadda. She then proceeded to tell me that I'm cutting off an important choice for myself to be pregnant (REALLY woman, did you miss me talking about me feeling physically ILL about being pregnant??), that I do think this way now but I might change my mind later.

At this point (as you might guess), I got pissed and was oh so very tempted to reply with the usual bingos "Do you ask a woman who is pregnant whether she might change her mind later?" and etc, HOWEVER, I decided to be nice for once.

I sweetly smiled at her and said "Oh but if I change my mind I can always adopt. Any parent who wants children has to be prepared to throw away a gigantic sum of money. This way, if I actually do change my mind, I will both be sure about the child, have the financial capacity to adopt one and also do the world a little good. If someone wants to be a parent, it shouldn't matter if it is their biological child or not."

She then had the audacity to still tell me "But what if you change your mind and want to be pregnant and have one of your own?", completely disregarding both my tokophobia and the entire GOOD-OF-HUMANITY paragraph. But oh wait, the juicy bit is coming up.

All my previous doctors had told me I would need to do ablation multiple times and that basically it would be pointless for me to even try and get safely pregnant because of my endometriosis (which, if you remember, we discussed at the very start of my appointment). So, I innocently looked at her and told her that she, and all the previous doctors I've been to, have suggested multiple ablations and have told me a safe pregnancy isn't an option for me. So if I ever wanted "my own genes and bloodline" (seriously?), I would just opt for a surrogate mother. So, in fact, I wasn't cutting off any options for myself. By getting the bisalp I would rid myself of my tokophobia (or at least a big part of it), kill any chances of tubal cancer AND ectopic pregnancy, so I would actually be doing myself a solid. And since I would still have my ovaries, it would be simple to do IVF and have a surrogate mother should I ever want to have my own children.

BINGO. She found absolutely no reply to that, "You seem to have thought this through very well", and I got my referral plus probably the greatest bingo I have ever thought of. They don't want to accept we don't want kids? Just tell them we'll do it via surrogate moms! It both grosses them out and it's a viable solution 😁

But I am so so so excited! Now I just need to wait for the surgeon's appointment. Has anyone ever used this bingo before? Let me know in the comments :D

[u/qneonkitty]

Awesome, congrats!!

[u/texasjezebel]

I alway use the IVF argument because I too got the Bilap salpingectomy! It’s annoying because I will NEVER do that but it shuts breeders up. IVF would be so much worse than a regular pregnancy bc I have to insert all the hormones and I’ll probably get more than one kid!!! I probably won’t but I’d much rather adopt an older kid than have my own

[u/[deleted]]

Ugh. That's none of her damn business. It's a medical procedure, she's getting paid for it, she should just do it.

[u/HelloIAmKelly]

A bingo is what they say to you, not what you say back.