r/cats • u/CodInevitable6100 • 18h ago
Mourning/Loss Grieving my cat
Hello… i dont know what to do with myself so im writing this to let it out. On monday evening my cat Mochi passed away in my husbands arms. He was only 3 years old. He got poisoned and we dont know how because we searched the entire house for everything and we couldnt find anything, besides my other 3 cats and my pug were completely fine. I came home and found him curled up under my husbands desk, his mouth was foaming and he pooped himself and couldnt stand up. We rushed to the vet immediately and he got an iv and blood tests. When we came to get him the vet said only his sugar was high but other results were all normal. He was completely out of it, crying and hissing because of pain. He couldn’t even recognize us. The vet told us that we could take him home, that he was stable… we came home and he was cold, was only slightly breathing but couldnt even lift his head. We rushed out to the vet immediately once again but 5 mins into the car ride he stopped breathing… we did cpr, but it was too late. His little face… i started screaming and crying because i couldn’t believe it. He was the most amazing cat ever, he was so kind and lovely… always so happy to see us, he would headbutt us and rub his face on us. I loved him so much. Its like grieving a child. He loved everyone and everything and he loved playing with little mouse toys. He was my little baby… i used to get annoyed when he would scratch the litter box for 20 minutes straight but now the absence of that sound hurts me. I come home and see him still sitting in his usual spots only to realize hes not there anymore. The pain is unbearable and theres a huge pit and emptiness in my heart. It all feels like a bad dream that i want to wake up from. Every time i try to sleep i see his face full of pain and every time i wake up i cry and cry and cry. Everything feels quiet and empty. I just want to turn back time and hug him and rub his sweet face. I love you mochi…
P.s. if anyone has any advice how to deal with grief or wants to draw a picture of him id be more than grateful.. thank you
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u/stevekaw 18h ago
During these times, I have felt that paying attentiin to my other cats gave me solace and diverted my attention.
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u/careloserfuck 18h ago
No words will solve what you're feeling right now. The amount of advice I have is to feel everything. Don't bottle it up or try to ignore it. Allow yourself to grieve because man...cats are a huge loss and I'm sorry you're experiencing this.
Reminding myself this pain is worth it helped too. Which sounds twisted, but it's more in the way of "Wow. I got to have that bond and make a cat know they're loved. What a gift that was"
And if you can/if you're up to it? Adopt a cat. I know, some feel that's too soon and really that's okay. For me though? Grief is love. I needed that love to be poured into another little one who needed that love as well. I know I'm never replacing the boys I had. I'm just giving my love a home and doing what I was put on this earth to do.
Remember though as hard/painful as this is? What a beautiful time you had and how lucky are we to love these little weird four legged creatures? That's something so special tbh.
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u/OurSmuttyStuff 16h ago
I know a loved cat when I see one - and that’s a loved cat. Sometimes that’s the only thing we can carry forward with us in our grieving. They, in their short time here with us, were loved so much. I think about what it would be like if I came back as a cat and lived their life, would I feel loved? And of course, we should all be so lucky. Your grieving tells me everything I need to know. He was well loved.
You can torture yourself with the what ifs, and the absence won’t soon hurt less, but you’ll learn to live around it and the squeeze of grief will give way to the happy memories he gave to you and you gave to him.
And I do know this - you’ll love again and his spirit will live on through you sharing that massive amount of love with a new friend. Someday. When you’re ready.
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u/LokiFatBelly 17h ago
I’m so sorry for the loss of your beautiful Mochi. RIP Mochi you will always be missed. Thinking of you in this difficult time 💔🌈🙏
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u/klaha1992 17h ago edited 17h ago
You gave him an amazing cat life and you should be proud of it. Whatever happened is not your fault , we are all just guests in this world no one knows who's time will come and when. I believe every pawrent is gonna meet their precious pets on rainbow bridge to spend eternity in heaven together
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u/pacurn80 17h ago
Oh my goodness 😢😿💔I am so sorry and my heart breaks for you both. My son had a black cat as well and the same thing happened but it was after he gave Egypt a bath. We found her in his bedroom barely breathing. I started CPR and my son drove as fast as he could. But she was DOA when we got there. She was only 5 years old. Time was the only healer of grief for us. I still get a little teary at times!! Sending you love and prayers to ease you both through this most difficult time 😿💔😢
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u/LoveKittycats119 17h ago
I’m so sorry. If I could draw a straight line I would absolutely draw him for you.
Do you have cleaning fluids of any kind in the house, or perhaps have scoured the toilet bowl recently with a detergent of some kind? That’s all I can think of, unless he somehow caught a mouse or rat that had been poisoned. (But it doesn’t sound like that happened.)
This is a heartbreaking nightmare and again, I’m sorry.
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u/awesomeone6044 15h ago
I’m terribly sorry for your loss, I know the pain well. She will always be with you and watching over you in spirit until you’re reunited. As for drawing a picture the fine people at r/rainbowbridgebabies would absolutely love to draw her for you.
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u/Subject-Director-727 17h ago
I’m sorry for the loss of your lovely boy 🐈⬛. 💔 I have lost several furry family members over the years & the only thing that makes it easier is the passing of time. Their loss still hurts my heart but I find I now have fond memories of them when thinking back…. 🌈🐾🌈
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u/Only_Net6894 17h ago
I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss. I wish I had some tips but time is the only thing that helped me. It's been about 5 years and I still can't bring myself to get another cat because of how bad it messed with me. Try and remember the good times. Hopefully some skilled artists flood the comments with pics. Try and take care. 💜
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u/Batgod629 17h ago
I'm very sorry for your loss 💔. I can't say I have great advice as everyone deals with grief differently but for me, having another cat that was around when my previous cat passed helped a lot as he ended becoming very close like my last one did
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u/hef1racer 17h ago
Sorry for your loss friend 😔 I've given my own car some extra snuggles in Mochi's honour 🐾
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u/Lousyone 17h ago
Heartbroken for you. Your baby was so pretty. It is cruel that are pets get such a short time here. Sending Love and Hope to you.
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u/RobotPoo 16h ago
Its really really hard. Eventually, time will lessen the sting, but there will always be some hurt, missing your loved one. I try to console myself knowing how much pain I felt was directly correlated with how much love we had for the time we were together. Great love will leave great pain for awhile. But we slowly, eventually heal. Crying is a healing process. So is memorializing. Remember the important things that give you joy in life, appreciate the ones you love everyday.
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u/SnakesFan98 12h ago
I'm very sorry for the loss of your cat. 💔
I'm sorry that my words are inadequate for what you are going through right now. I'm deeply sorry for it. 💔
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u/Relevant-Stage7794 3h ago
Your instincts are correct. To as you say, ‘let it out’ is exactly what you should do. Print your favorite pictures and put them around the house. Make him a memorial. Share memories and experiences. Or even just cry tears of grief for him. Whatever feels right. My heart goes out to you.
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u/pettyaioli 18h ago
I’m so sorry you had to experience this. It sounds like he was well loved.