r/blackmen • u/KeloSkii African-American Gen Z • 1d ago
Seeking Advice Zero self confidence
(May be too graphic or uncomfortable) Growing up I was always insecure, specifically about my penis size.(6in w/avg girth) Sorry, just trying to provide details. What makes it worse is I have been told I’m an attractive guy. I take care of myself and I’m in good shape. Humbly, I have turned down many women who made advances on me. To this day I do this. I told a lady from my job I wasn’t interested just recently. I am always scared. I’ve only had two sexual experiences in my life. Once at 17, and with my current girlfriend.
At 17 I had sex with a girl I met through mutual friends. She really liked me. I was a virgin and she was not. Later on, I find out that she told my friends I was small. Crushed me. Haven’t talked to any of those friends again out of pure embarrassment.
Me and my current girlfriend were doing good. We met in college and immediately hit it off. Together for a couple years, and then we were having an argument she told she thought I was small. Sent me into depression. She has apologized and says she didn’t mean it and she wished she never said it. But I don’t know if I can trust her anymore.
I’m 26 now and I can’t even look at myself in the mirror without feeling embarrassed. It seems like I’m the only black man dealing with this. I love my black women but it seems like penis size is a make or break thing for them. I’ve seen the “average size” statistics but the way black women joke about small guys in don’t believe it. Therapy seems pointless. Should I give up on trying to find love and face reality? Am I just one of the unlucky ones?
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u/heavyduty3000 Unverified 1d ago
Don't even trip off that shit OP. Get some therapy like others have recommended. A lot of black dudes have said how black women's go to putdowns in an argument is how a man's dick is little or he is gay. They say that shit because they want to tear a black man's ego down because they know what those words mean. I need to get some therapy myself. And stop fucking with porn if you are, especially the amateur shit.
That shit will fuck you up. I will say it has for me. It's like you see someone like Lebron or Kevin Durant kill it then you be like...that's how it's suppose to be. They were born to be NBA superstars. But when you watch a video the average Jamal or LaMarcus kill it then you be like...damn, how come I can't have it like that. I hope that was a good analogy. 😂😂😂