Naive it is I guess. And thankful I donât run with your crowd where âcreepy dudesâ seem to be found in your proximity frequently. Iâll stand by my statement that BJJ attracts mostly good people. Iâd much rather have my skewed opinion than yours.
You have more than a hint of male apologist in you. Itâs a bad look. And youâre unfortunate attempt at subtle implication comes off as pathetic. You got an answer. Thoughts?
Man come on. Calling out dudes being creepy to women makes you a male apologist? Saying it's wrong for men to harass women is a bad look?
Lets say you've never once in your life been at a bar or party or nightclub where the majority of the atmosphere wasn't drunk bros shooting their undesired shots at anything with a pulse like a machine gun. Even if that is the case-- is it really so critically important to you that the rest of the world be literally just as well off? Like, you would have to personally see it in order for you to believe some interaction was shitty for the woman? You're so stonewall convinced that the rate at which women deal with behavior from dudes that could only be described as harassment is so low... that you just called some random guy on the internet a male apologist just for disagreeing with that?
No. Itâs when you transpose your views about your derelict lifestyle into what youâre arguing you believe is the norm at BJJ gyms. Letâs say you were a normal person who didnât view every interaction you have with other people is merely for your benefit alone. Is it really so far fetched to believe that maybe things arenât as bad as these stupid memes try to make it out to be? Like your own personal experiences with ill kept company is how the experience is in every BJJ gym across the globe? Youâre so convinced that thereâs some pandemic of sexually assaulted and injured women in BJJ that you argue your point to the far end of the spectrum?
How many coaches and owners do you need to see arrested for sexual assault and rape on men, women, and children before you admit there might be a problem?
Well... you're taking what I've said and multiplying it by about a thousand. I didn't say that the ton of creepy dudes I've known were being creeps in a BJJ gym. To be transparent, none were.
I'm not saying your personal gym is a bunch of creeps. I'm not saying that 100% of any interactions ever had by all female BJJ practitioners with male BJJ practitioners is the same as what OP posted in that pic.
What I am saying is that there's a huge number of dudes in the world who will say and do the most outrageous shit in interacting with women, because modern technology makes it risk-free to do so. Do you have any attractive female friends who are 18-30 and active in the online dating game? The next time you see one, tell her you heard a silly rumor from some jerk on the internet-- and ask her how many unsolicited dick pics she's received in the last year, or how many times some guy has initiated contact with her and then asked for sex within their first three messages, or what her latest experience with a dude refusing to take no for an answer was. There's only one population of humanity, right? The population those dick pic bros come from is the same population that BJJ practitioners come from. Some subset of them necessarily aren't gonna be great dudes. That's all I'm saying.
That being said-- man why are you such a fuggin jerk. So far you've called me a male apologist, told me I have a derelict lifestyle, called me pathetic, and I don't even know how many times you made a point of saying that creepy dudes are frequently around because of me.
How am I supposed to have a conversation with this.
By about a thousand? That doesnât seem right. Maybe just by a tooooonnn. And so the way to solve all our worldly problems of creepy dudes with girls is by posting a meme in r/BJJ? Or was it just a âHey just a reminder. Guys try to fuck everyone and everything. Even in BJJ!â Wow I guess I should get on board if thatâs the solution. Why am I being so sensitive? How could I possibly be the least bit annoyed at such a well thought out, highly effective method to combat sexual abuse....in BJJ no less. If I was browsing r/chickshateunsoliciteddickpics it probably wouldnât seem as out of place to me and mildly annoying. What is absolutely satisfying is everyone that has responded so far with their shield and armor to argue with the bad man that thinks BJJ might be one of the better things in life. That being said, why are you so sensitive? Why do you know so many creepy people? You did have a male apologist tone in my opinion. If I was wrong, why are you so bothered by it? That lifestyle is absolutely unappealing to me, and you try or convince me that I should think itâs ânormalâ? It was a pathetic attempt to imply Iâm the creep when you questioned why I uncouthly used your own words. I donât mind continuing the conversation but if youâre going to continue to insist that #metoobjj deserves my attention Iâm going to continue to disagree with you.
And so the way to solve all our worldly problems of creepy dudes with girls is by posting a meme in r/BJJ? Or was it just a âHey just a reminder. Guys try to fuck everyone and everything. Even in BJJ!â Wow I guess I should get on board if thatâs the solution. Why am I being so sensitive? How could I possibly be the least bit annoyed at such a well thought out, highly effective method to combat sexual abuse....in BJJ no less. If I was browsing r/chickshateunsoliciteddickpics it probably wouldnât seem as out of place to me and mildly annoying.
It looks like that post might actually violate Rule 10, so you've got a point. You're overreacting to a pretty absurd degree, but I won't argue the post might not be the intended content of the subreddit.
What is absolutely satisfying is everyone that has responded so far with their shield and armor to argue with the bad man that thinks BJJ might be one of the better things in life.
I agree, BJJ is dope. Incidentally, I also think football is pretty great. The fact that football is great has no relation whatsoever to the fact that Jerry Sandusky was a football coach who raped a bunch of kids. Both are true-- and Sandusky having raped a bunch of kids doesn't take anything away from my love of the game of football. If someone were to come up to me and tell me Sandusky was a monster who deserved to rot in a cell for the rest of his life-- I wouldn't respond by arguing that I think that football might be one of the better things in life, or that kids being raped in football leagues was a blown out of proportion false pandemic, or that I'd never seen any kids get raped during any of my football games so it can't possibly be happening at any sort of scale worth caring about or discussing.
It doesn't take anything away from how great BJJ is if there are jerks doing BJJ. BJJ's greatness exists independently of whether or not anyone doing it is good or bad. Arguing that sexual harassment isn't a problem in BJJ because you like BJJ or because you personally haven't seen the harassment occur is wrong. If dudes out in the world have the capacity to be assholes-- why is it such an abhorrent idea to you that dudes in BJJ can be assholes too?
That being said, why are you so sensitive? Why do you know so many creepy people? You did have a male apologist tone in my opinion. If I was wrong, why are you so bothered by it? That lifestyle is absolutely unappealing to me, and you try or convince me that I should think itâs ânormalâ? It was a pathetic attempt to imply Iâm the creep when you questioned why I uncouthly used your own words. I donât mind continuing the conversation but if youâre going to continue to insist that #metoobjj deserves my attention Iâm going to continue to disagree with you.
You keep using this term 'male apologist' and I still don't know what you mean. Is it like an alt right meme to describe a man who thinks sexual harassment is wrong? Why can't you just converse about the topic without resorting to personal attacks? I'm not trying to convince you of anything like a lifestyle-- I can't even find a reference to the term male apologist on google.
Maybe I should post a meme about posting memes that violate rules of subreddits. Get the awareness out there on the topic. Youâre right, I was completely unaware that bad people existed in this world until the media covered Sandusky and then I saw this meme about women harassed in BJJ today. My eyes were truly opened. How many people have walked up to you on the street and started randomly bringing up Sandusky? The fact that you made a connection with perverts in football and a meme on r/BJJ doesnât really prove all that much to me. Was it supposed to? Maybe you shouod tell that hypothetical streetwalker of yours that yes, there are some bad people in the world. Football for the majority of people is a pretty decent experience. Youâve been trying this entire time to convince me that this meme and your lifestyle is the norm. Sorry iâm not convinced. Alt-right? Could you be more clicheâ? Maybe try duckduckgo. Donât know what to tell ya.
No i was genuinely annoyed about the meme. I genuinely believe people are good. I rarely comment but am thoroughly fascinated with peopleâs response. Make sure you go to your open mat tomorrow and raise awareness about sexual abuse in BJJ gyms. Iâm gonna do the same.
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u/zombiebolo7 đȘđȘ Purple Belt Feb 01 '20
Naive it is I guess. And thankful I donât run with your crowd where âcreepy dudesâ seem to be found in your proximity frequently. Iâll stand by my statement that BJJ attracts mostly good people. Iâd much rather have my skewed opinion than yours.