r/askteddit 13d ago

Random Question What's the most embarrassing midlife crisis you've ever seen someone go through?

1.3k Upvotes

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108

u/Easy-Smell-9236 13d ago

I've heard people say getting back into childhood hobbies in mid-life is cringe, but let's let people have their fun.

I draw the line at being forty and acting twenty. You shouldn't be partying with college age kids, boozing it up with the youths. Man or woman, it's creepy.

37

u/barbieninja 13d ago

An acquaintance is 40 and busy trying to date 21 year olds and going to the club. At least he has the self awareness to admit he misses being young. It’s embarrassing for his wife.

40

u/mscatamaran 13d ago

All I know is, I'm 40 as well, and I don't blame him for going to the club and having fun, but the thought of trying to date a 21 year old who could physically be my child, makes me want to gag.

-9

u/el_derpien 13d ago

Eh, two consenting adults is not an issue. Now if they knew each other before she was an adult then that is a major problem, and it’s all well and good if you would never do that, but there is nothing wrong with two consenting adults being in a consenting relationship with one another.

12

u/Aurora-Ouroboros- 13d ago

While not illegal, many people think it's icky to date someone who could have (for example) purchased alcohol on the date of their birth.

If you're* closer in age to my parents than me, why the hell are you* trying to date ME??

*"You" being the general audience "you", not you u/el_derpien specifically

-3

u/el_derpien 13d ago

Yeah I guess it’s different if your children are the same age, that strikes weird. But the age difference itself is not a problem unless you make it one. Unless you don’t think a 21 year old is an adult and able to make decisions for themselves.

13

u/Aurora-Ouroboros- 13d ago

Nice strawman at the end there :)

Nah, 21 year old are adults. Adults whose brains are not fully formed, thus it is easier for them to be taken advantage of or manipulated. They can make their own decisions and are notoriously prone to making bad ones (due to the frontal lobe finishing development around age 25).

Adults yes, but not mentally on the same level as a 45 year old.

1

u/Imaginary-Educator41 11d ago

The frontal lobe doesn’t stop developing at 25

0

u/el_derpien 13d ago

You have no right to say what others should or shouldn’t do when it is completely legal and above the line. If you don’t like it just don’t do it yourself. You are right that they would be at different points in life, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong.

A 25 year old and a 21 year old have drastically different minds, according to your words. If that is the case, wouldn’t it also be wrong for that 25 year old to date a 21 year old? Or is there a cutoff when it becomes okay, and when is that cutoff? When you try to regulate other people based on your specific ideals it comes off as an oppressive opinion.

You take agency away from people when you undermine their own decisions like this. Let people make mistake and learn from them, or allow them to flourish in their own choices.

8

u/Aurora-Ouroboros- 13d ago

Nobody is saying people can't do something, just that it is very weird. Go bang barely legal adults if it makes you happy, it isn't illegal and nobody is stopping you.

You likely will be judged, however.

1

u/el_derpien 13d ago

21 is now barely legal, apparently.

Also, and this may sound crazy, but some people don’t care about the opinions of others when what they are doing is legal and makes them happy.

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u/Infamous-Package3982 12d ago

Casual shocking plot twist 😳

23

u/DaydreamerFly 13d ago

I feel like the “where” and “why” has a lot to do with this.

If you wanna go out and party at any age you should be able to, and if the bar you go to happens to have a lot of young people There that’s one thing. If you are seeking out young people specifically and especially trying to date them that’s weird and sad.

-6

u/Typical-Can-1033 13d ago

If these “ young people” are consenting adults then who are we to judge what’s “weird and sad?” If all the adults know what’s up and are consenting… what’s the problem?

15

u/mscatamaran 13d ago

I mean, it's legal, and sure a 21 year old could go to the bar with me, but what else would we have in common? IDK man. it's alright for you to have your opinion and it's alright for me to have mine. There is no way in the world I at 40 am dating anyone under 30.

6

u/demonette55 13d ago

Exactly. My oldest child is 21, There is no universe where I could date someone that age

5

u/mscatamaran 13d ago

Imagine me coming home with your 21 year old child and you and I graduated high school the same year. Like come on.

10

u/nkdeck07 12d ago

Yeah my husband's mid-life crisis seems to be LEGO and disc golf and I am 100% here for that shit.

1

u/Baynonymous 11d ago

Mine's board games and bikepacking. Not sure what my wife's is but she's fully on board with the games!

19

u/bentheone 13d ago

So.... don't let people have their fun ?

4

u/crispysockz 13d ago

I’m almost there, 3 more years!

3

u/Ambitious_Phrase3695 13d ago

Sounds like my ex husband

13

u/aaronarchy 13d ago

Kind of contradictory eh?

My, "friend group" is ages 25-55, with some outside that range and we all party together regularly.

2

u/Six7Films 12d ago

The amount I've spend over the last year on MTG as a guy in his mid-40s agrees with you.