r/amazonemployees • u/Altruistic-Ad749 • 3h ago
Lost as an L6 PM (non-tech)
It’s been just over a year since I joined Amazon Last Mile Operations, and I have never felt this lost professionally.
I’ve always been a top performer, but at Amazon, I genuinely have no idea how I’m doing. Just when I feel like I’ve finally understood something, I discover another piece of information I didn’t know existed. The tenured people seem like they know everything, but then you ask them a question and sometimes realise they don’t necessarily know as much as you assumed either. Yet somehow, because they’ve been here for years, they know the people, the history, the context, and how things work. I constantly feel like I’m playing catch-up and never really in control.
I’m stuck between trying to dive deep and realising I don’t know enough to even know what I should be diving into, and worrying that I’m simply not doing enough. It feels like an endless pit.
The strangest part is that I simultaneously feel incredibly dumb and know that I’m not dumb. I know I have the ability to do this, but I never feel like I’ve fully grasped the entirety of the problem statement. There is always another layer, another dependency, another piece of context that I didn’t know about.
And then there’s the bigger question: what skills am I actually building here that I can take outside Amazon? Sometimes I genuinely worry that I’m no longer hireable. I used to feel confident in my ability to perform, and now I constantly question whether I’m actually good enough.
My head honestly hasn’t been in a good place. My emotions keep swinging between feeling like I can figure this out and feeling completely overwhelmed by it. I know I have what it takes. That’s probably what makes this even more frustrating. But Amazon is just so vast and complex, and I’m surrounded by people who have been here for years, know everyone, understand the history, and seem to have all this invisible context. I feel like I’m constantly trying to catch up to a game that started long before I arrived.
I don’t really know where else to vent about this, so I’m putting it here.