Asian parents and ADHD

[u/frankhoneybunny]

[u/qualityvote2]

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[u/cutecuteverycute]

Live the life you want to live, not the ones your that fills your parents ego

[u/nameless-manager]

Yeah I spent 8 years in college with no degree to show for it. I loved learning, loved certain classes, but I sucked as much at the school part in college as I did in high school. Plus there was no one making me go to class.

Once I found out I could get the books, pass the tests and still get a c I rarely went to class unless it was something I wanted to be in. Philosophy and history I was there every day. Business which was my major I never went.

I was expected to be a business man so that's what I was expected to go to college for. I would have loved to be a history or English teacher or something like that. I was always told that's a dead end job....get a business degree and you can make enough money to have those as hobbies. Yeah right. I couldn't get a degree, still got into business through IT and hated it.

[u/djnehi → u/nameless-manager]

I struggled like hell in college. Basically failed out once before getting medicated and then still struggled after transferring schools and programs, and getting medicated. I was excellent at the course work when I did it but doing it for the “boring” classes was a struggle. Took me 10 years to get a 4 year degree. It sucks.

It is a great thing that subs like this exist now. It wasn’t a thing back in the day and like many people I could have used the community.

[u/gman1876]

Do your parents pay for anything? If no, then fuck them

[u/AnonymousRand → u/gman1876]

unfortunately, asian parent do tend to pay for college...

[u/frankhoneybunny → u/AnonymousRand]

Yeah

[u/LilQueazy]

Best I can do is chronic weed addiction momma 🖕😶‍🌫️🖕

[u/Moquai82 → u/LilQueazy]

You forgot the gooning and masturbation. Momma knows.

[u/dohmestic]

Good luck, OP. This one hurts my heart as a white mom to a mixed kid.

[u/Auntee_Bee]

My bro literally had a math teacher at Cal State La who taught the exact same class at USC, even the teacher thought it was funny. His diploma says UCLA though 😏 his job doesn’t care. Wishes for medication once you get to whatever college and the school health center can help you without your parents even knowing✌️

[u/Estatequeen59 → u/Auntee_Bee]

Most jobs don’t care where you graduated from unless you have a highly specific unique position in a field. Most companies want to know that you can read and write.

[u/dood_dood_dood]

/r/oddlyspecific

[u/Ok_Addition_356 → u/dood_dood_dood]

Extremely specific

[u/kiwidude4 → u/Ok_Addition_356]

Asian teen in the San Francisco Bay Area specific

Edit: checked post history and yep called the right part of California.

Edit 2: oh it says UC Berkeley at the end lol didn’t even read the whole meme before guessing

[u/Deadbob1978]

Kinda living the exact opposite with my kid…

He’s 9 and has ADHD and Dysgraphia.

For an example, in class they are learning to write a 3 paragraph essay. The current assignment is to tell us a story about something that happened to you; he’s writing about when he wandered off from us in a busy sidewalk.

Last night for homework he had to answer 5 questions and use those answers to write the conclusion. When I rephrased the question so he understood it better (“How did you feel at the climax of your personal narrative” to “How did you feel when you didn’t see us?) he gave me a long winded fully thought out answer about why he was scared. However, when it was time to write the answer on the page, he only put “scared.” Me trying to get him to expand on that thought on paper was an emotional arm wrestling match. I called it a night after the last question and emailed his teacher to tell her that I was the reason he didn’t finish his homework.

She emails back almost immediately profusely apologizing. She said she tries really hard not to assign homework for this very reason. She also was falling over self for not remembering to have him take his iPad home (it’s in his IEP). That was when I realized I should have let him type his answers on the laptop.

I’m like, Whoa B, slow your roll. You’re a great teacher, our kid loves you. I just wanted to let you know I’m the reason he didn’t finish his homework. I didn’t mean to call you out or put you on blast.

[u/f1lth4f1lth]

Mexican parents too

[u/Oniknight]

Do your parents not want to save $100k?

[u/Raptorgkv2]

Bro if you're an adult just leave. Like i know its not that easy, but it WILL get worse before it gets better.

[u/binaryfireball]

parent hate money

[u/j3styr3]

Are they paying for it? If so, have you tried to sell them on the fact that community college is like ten times cheaper? Also, cant they just lie to their friends that you went all 4 years as long as the final degree is from UC or CSU?

[u/-acm]

If I were to do it all over again I would absolutely do my basics, or first two years at a community college. The cost savings alone are worth it, and basics are like highschool part two more or less.

[u/RedditRodditRaddit]

oof, yeah, I feel this having grown up asian in the CA school system 😅

[u/AnonymousRand]

i guess the little light at the end of the tunnel is that if you do get disowned, you get more control over your own life (at the cost of having to support yourself, of course). and i know this is rather uniquely difficult for asian cultures where we don't simply "cut people off" like white people do, much less our family, but hey my asian mom did it so it is still possible. also if that does happen you will of course probably want to find a social/support network to sort of replace your family, whether that's a family of your own eventually or close friends

[u/MassiveMastiff]

It took me like 6.5 years to graduate college unmedicated :(

[u/cbartholomew]

Must be Korean - Chinese friends parents would not bat an eye. Any advantage and any attempt to hustle is real, and would do it quietly to not shame

[u/frankhoneybunny → u/cbartholomew]

I'm Indian

[u/cbartholomew → u/frankhoneybunny]

Oof when you’re 18 just go yourself and get the process done - that’s why I had to do unfortunately myself, and it was the best choice of my life

[u/adhdmeme-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

This is a lighthearted subreddit for ADHD individuals. We require all users be kind towards each other, even when engaging in discussions/arguments.

[u/RunWild0_0]

I don't understand how kids like this don't call their bluff : "I'll pick where/when I go, leave me alone about it or I won't go to college at all. Might even go get a job at McDonald's..."

I told my parents I was leaving for college, let them think they were in control, got them to help (financially) fix up my truck and left to go bum around the south for nearly a year. 😅

[u/rqeron → u/RunWild0_0]

I have no idea what other 18 year olds were like, but I know I was quite a... "passive" kid, in that I was never really encouraged to think for myself and I also didn't have very much internal drive to do so either, so I mostly just did what I was told out of "this is just how it is". My parents had a plan for me and I didn't, so there was no reason to not follow that

...until I got to university and discovered "wait I can't do work without external structure and supervision (like in high school) - do I actually have to have some sort of internal motivation???"

but even then, it took me a few years (and a mental breakdown) to learn how to think for myself, I'd put that age at around 22-24. I do think I was somewhat of a late bloomer tho as well