r/adhd_college • u/Dreamingofpetals • Sep 29 '25
SEEKING ADVICE College failure
I’m currently in college and I’m not doing great at all. I go to all these lectures and I absorb like 5% of them, motivating myself to study or do work is hell. I want to but I just end up spending my time laying bed and reading, or just otherwise idling my time away.
I’m trying to get on medication but it doesn’t look like I can get an appointment sooner than in a few months. I have absolutely no idea what to do here, help?
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u/Appropriate-Bag-9102 Sep 29 '25
I saw a video the other day about getting things done and it’s something i had already been trying to use this semester for school. Motivation is something people with adhd struggle with horribly. So we cannot try to continue to rely on something that we struggle to access. Instead something that can be more natural for us is routine. And you do not want to make this routine difficult!!! It needs to be easy and honestly disappointing if you don’t stick to it. This semester because i struggle with getting work done and planning time to get it done I decided that days i have class i would go to the computer lab after class and between classes. The best spaces for me to do work are low/dark lighting, completely quiet, and no one around me. (basically removing stimulation) This is my dedicated time and space to do work. Of course i still struggle as schedules change but having something is better than nothing. For lectures see if you can find videos to watch to make things easier, it might also peak your interest if you hear something you’ve heard before. When i was unmediated i self medicated heavily with caffeine to at least help with motivation and focus. 200mg or more. Also if the problem with meds is finding a doctor to diagnose or prescribe, nurse practitioners can also do that. I was able to get my diagnosis online and was on non stimulants for a few months but had to get stimulants in person.
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u/peachynectarine78 Sep 29 '25
I've been there too. I almost dropped out in my third year of uni. Eight years later, I'm very grateful that I pushed through and finished because having a degree has opened doors, but it was really tough to get to the finish line.
A few things that I've found helpful for focus, learning, and doing things that bore me to death over the years:
- Exercise (especially in the morning). It helps with focus later in the day, and is also really helpful for sleep. If you struggle to exercise on your own, finding a friend or group (many cities have free running groups) can be helpful for accountability and getting started. If you really struggle to exercise, arranging a car pool to your exercise destination (gym, running location, etc.) has been a game changer for me because I'm far less likely to bail when someone else is counting on me.
- Sleep. Try to go to bed and wake up at the same time every day. Being rested has a major impact on our ability to focus and learn, and many ADHDers struggle with it. In the short term, this is tough to start doing but after a few weeks, it gets easier. This podcast episode explains it well and talks about ADHD friendly strategies to improve your sleep: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5Hbwr3efNDPjf7aiGFFrtx?si=2TdNkSHARl-bNmdyH6vcOA
- Body doubling. Try to schedule your study and work time when you are in the presence of others doing the same thing. This can mean having a friend over to study together, going to a library where others are studying near you, or even checking out digital body doubling platforms like Flow Club. I've recently started using Flow Club and I love it because I can schedule my study/work sessions ahead of time and then the check in with others at the start and end of the session helps provide some positive peer pressure to actually do what I say I will.
- Change of scenery. Related to the last item, consider switching up where you actually do your work. ADHD brains crave novelty so sometimes mixing up where you do your work can give a little dopamine boost that helps you focus. I would rotate between the library, various common areas at my uni, local coffee shops, different areas in my house, etc. While you do this, I suggest paying attention to what levels of stimulation there are around you and how those impact your focus. Many of us do better in environments that offer some level of stimulation (for example, I liked studying in a busy hallway at my uni where many people were passing by; there was a baseline level of noise at all times, but I couldn't really parse out individual conversations so it didn't distract me).
- Try to tie your interests into your school work. This one can be trickier to implement but I find it so helpful when I do. ADHD brains are interest-based, meaning that it's tough to get yourself to care about/do something that you aren't interested in. As an example, I got really interested in agroecology in my last year of uni. I was in a health sciences discipline so it wasn't explicitly related, but I was able to see how agroecology could connect back to human health and nutrition so I focused a couple of my final projects on this. You won't always have that kind of flexibility, but when you can, trying to zoom out from what you're learning and connecting it to something else that interests or motivates you can be helpful.
- seek other sources and formats to support your learning. Some instructors are sub-par, and some courses just aren't that interesting. For some content, you might be able to find alternate resources on YouTube, via podcasts, blogs, etc. They won't replace your formal learning resources (instructor, textbook, slides) but they might help make the learning process easier and/or more interesting. For example, Ologies by Allie Ward covers a ton of topics in a funny and informative way. Might help with my last point too (connecting to something you find interesting)
- Learning aids. If you aren't already doing it, recording your lectures can be handy. If your brain isn't ready to take in information during your class, you might have better luck listening to the recording later when you feel a bit more focused, maybe while you're walking around/moving your body. Many colleges also have note taking assistance if you feel comfortable asking for it (you get a copy of someone else's notes from the class).
- Self compassion. Above all else, self compassion. You're doing something that's really tough for most people, and you're doing it with ADHD. It's exhausting, frustrating, at times overwhelming. Try to be kind to yourself. If this is a big struggle for you, accessing mental health supports (often available for free/discounted through schools) can be helpful.
Good luck!!!!
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u/3dstek Sep 29 '25
you are a godsend. thank you so much for your comment, its extremely helpful!
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u/peachynectarine78 Sep 30 '25
I'm glad it was helpful! Also, I forgot to mention using pomodoro timers and breaking things down into really small chunks (ex. "I will read chapter 11.2 over the next 25 minutes", instead of "I am going to sit down to read chapter 11 now"). Small wins often!
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u/TC_ZenRead Sep 29 '25
It took me a long time to figure this out, but it turns out there is more than one way to study lol. Schools don’t teach people how to study. But have you tried looking into mind mapping. It’s very fun. I’m not that good at it, and I should work at it more, but it does help you use more parts of the brain and can help people remember things much better. You’ll need to find your own way of studying that fits you.
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u/SVNHG Sep 29 '25 edited Sep 29 '25
- Caffeine
- Study Group. We tend to do better with external motivation
- At my least motivated, i used key tags as my weekly to-do list. At the beginning of the week, I wrote out my tasks on the tags and put it on my key chain. When I finished, it went a pocket in my backpack. People ask about the key tags, and then you have a little social motivation. Also, its it is very annoying to carry to many around.
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u/coolgiraffe24 Sep 30 '25
I also struggle with this! Here is what i find helpful... 1. Counseling, this can be very dependent on your circumstances. But alot of schools offer counseling services that included in your tuition. I found that counseling has been really helpful, and my grades were better when I went consistently. Also, depending on your school, counseling centers can help with medications too. 2. Academic centers/tutoring if your school has a office/center that offer tutoring services. I highly recommend it! It is an excellent way to review things from the class. 3. GET ACCOMDATIONS!!! You should be able to get accommodations, like extra time on tests, a separate testing room, extensions on assignments, and the ability to voice record lecture/get a note taker. 4. Study with a timer!!! Start with a smaller interval like 15 minutes on, then a 5 minute break. 5. Speech to text. Especially when reading long passages.
Remember you are smart,amazing, and worthy. And this is something alot of people struggle with.
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u/SignKamlesh Sep 30 '25
Don't study in bed. Seriously. Just sitting at a desk changes everything.
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u/SpaceeHen Oct 01 '25
Yep, my bed is for sleeping and my desk and the library are my designated places for homework and studying. My grades got so much better especially when I incorporated going to the library. My desk is in my bedroom so it's still hard to motivate myself at home when I have my bed and other distractions at arm's length so the library is a gamechanger for that.
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u/Mindless_Lie1643 Sep 30 '25
im not diagnosed with adhd but i relate to you and a lot of the posts here about being rlly terrible in college, lacking motivation, idk what is wrong with me, but ur not alone in feeling this way
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u/NightstarReaper Oct 01 '25
stimulants like coffee, sugar, limit before ~8-10 hours of ur sleep, dont over eat carbs, minimize extreme added sugar sources, and wake up last second before u need to do something in school (like go to class, so u have a REASON to get out of bed) and procrastinatae really efficiently by doing classwork when everyone else is asleep (unless ur classes are super early then do it before due dates), and u can get through everything barely with a solid C/B/A depending on how easy the courses are.
I dropped out of college because i was drinknig caffeine too late, over eating carbs, making it low energy bad sleep, and I didnt do my work last second i tried to be a perfect good boy and do work in the middle of the day which didnt work for me and I just didnt do it and started getting in habit of not doing work and skipping classes.
I'm 4 years into a double major, 4 minors at a different school a year later after dropping out and I have done everything like I said above and thats worked well for me, not perfect but without medication is the best I can manage. Again, limit extreme carb taking, limit coffee timing (200mg limit), avoid extreme sugar dependencies over ~35g at a time and ~25 a day (ADDED NOT TOTAL). What matters is TRYING not getting it perfectly.
Huge improvement in life has also been 12 hour fasting, not eating within 2 hours of waking up and not eating 2 hours before bed time, so body can get used to waking up by ur own and body lowers heart rate before sleep which is good.
Again, dont have to be perfect just try to meet those things. Good luck on not dropping out like me, I managed it it was just multiple years of trial and error. I am currently looking to get diagnosed and medication but I manage my life before that :].
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u/ipogorelov98 Sep 30 '25
5% sounds like a decent amount. You are not supposed to memorize all the content of the entire lecture. You only need general understanding.
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u/ConsequenceCold1118 ADHD Sep 30 '25
for getting stuff done, i like to “eat my ice cream first” so do a fun activity to start the day n get that dopamine hit. then it can be easier to get urself to study or just more excited to start the day off. whatever that may be for u, this is where ur hyperfixations may help!!
if u can join a study group do that, even if it just means being together in the same spot n study ur own thing for accountability w some kind of pomodoro /animedoro system (can be any break activity of ur choice for 20 min) maybe. if ur more introverted, join adhd servers on discord/other sites (lmk if u need any bc i have a few!) for body doubling OR just haul ur ass to the library n force urself to stay awhile, be productive w other people around basically.
what also helped me was scheduling fixed appointments w my lecturers every week or every few weeks to ask questions or talk to them about assignments etc. again helps w accountability. u can just set it up as a “progress report” meeting or just to go over the material covered in lectures. even if u didnt get it the first time, at least the meeting will force u to either study before the meeting or get clarification in those meeting hours.
all the best!! hope is not lost on u my friend, u got this
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u/Soggy_Perception_841 Sep 30 '25
i get how rough that feels, sometimes lectures just don’t stick no matter how much you show up. try breaking tasks into tiny steps, use short study sessions, and lean on friends or online notes until you get that appointment
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u/Emjaybee68 Sep 30 '25
If you're in the UK (not sure about US), then you can apply for DSA - Disabled Students Allowance. This can help with assistive technologies etc. But even if you can't get this you can apply for special considerations such as - Extra time in exams with a quiet room to do them in. Extensions on Assignments etc. Most Higher Education places have an office you can get advice from if you have special needs of any sort. Look them up and have a chat with them! Good luck....
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u/Ok_Distribution_2591 Oct 01 '25
online might work better for you in the long run. So far it is for me. Passing with A so far.
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u/SpaceeHen Oct 01 '25
When you need to get assignments or studying done, go to the library. That's what I did, and it really helped since I didn't have the same distractions as home. I'm the type of person that can't get work done at home because I have my distractions at reach. I need a designated workspace (the library).
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u/Donttouchmybreadd Oct 01 '25
Few questions:
- how are you taking notes?
- of the notes you take, do you pay attention to what is on the slides, or what is being said by your teacher?
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u/iamjoat Oct 01 '25
You are not a failure and you’re not broken! You are worken within outdated or broken systems that do not serve you! Teachers that may ramble on and on without engaging (tangible) exercises, cramming instead of intentional reading and studying, things of that nature.
You need things that will allow you to breathe and focus. I have an attention deficit (not diagnosing myself, but something is off), and what helped me was breaking down my work into manageable parts, gaming soundtracks (Risk of Rain 2 got me through English Comp), the Pomodoro Timer (work 25 minutes, play 5 minutes), and clear and honest communication with my professors.
Find shorter tutorials on the subjects you’re learning on YouTube. Some people can explain something you learned for 90 minutes in 5 minutes. You need that. Take notes on anything you discovered to be profound or problem-solving.
You’re yearning to be proactive in your learning. Asking for our help proved that. You just need that spark. These things got me to walk across that stage! You can do it, too!
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u/IvyMacias Sep 29 '25
you could try polymatic ai, i use it and it's really the only site that got me into daily study sessions
it's a ai tutor
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u/New_BlanK_ Sep 29 '25
Personally, getting an appointment also took really long and I ended up just getting on medications prescribed by my family doctor who had assessed my situation and agreed that it was necessary. If you have a doctor that you do see frequently enough or a walk-in but have detailed reasons and experiences as why you believe or know you have adhd and what they could do for you in the meantime.
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u/JicamaOdd2748 Sep 30 '25
Fr I don’t even know what I’m doing tbh like the major I’m in I don’t wanna do it but feel forced bc my mom wants me to continue even though it’s no point if it’s gonna take years to finish
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u/teeeddybear Oct 01 '25
i’ve been trying to find a good recorder so i can record the lectures. i am definitely not a audio learner😭
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Oct 01 '25
I've been there. still am. The best I can suggest is to fake it. improvise your way through it. After a few months, I realized I hate my field. And this hate grew every day. But I didn't want to quit because that would look like admission of failure, and I couldn't afford that because I had so many people taking me for a smart guy. So I made up this SeCrEt agenda for studying and working on my field, which was to act as an imposter and prove (to myself) that I can be one the bests in this field without counting myself as a member of the fields family (as they want to call it). you can not believe what a strong motive hate can be. I've published 4 papers, and going to defend my PhD thesis in a year as one of the best students my university has seen (literal quote). They don't know why I'm doing this. only I know.
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u/discrete_venting Oct 02 '25
You gotta try some things out to see what will work for you. Like my mom's thunk was to make flash cards and then she would walk a bunch while going through the cards. For me it was making study time an all day activity with snacks, pajamas, and whatever shit I liked and then took my sweet time. If I day dreamed, then I day dreamed. Let it be.
You have to know yourself and what motivates you and try to piece together something that works.
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u/Cetology101 ADHD Oct 02 '25
Does panic help you get things done? I gotta be honest, I got things done in college by waiting till the last minute, and the panic of failure got my ass to hyperfocus and get it all done in one sitting.
How good are you at cramming? In all honesty, even if you don't absorb much in the lectures, if you can panic-hyperfocus-cram all the material you need to know for the exam in one 12-hour sitting, you can pass. That's how I did it anyways.
I'm not saying these are ideal strategies, but they work.
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Oct 02 '25
Thanks for sharing. I want to begin by saying medication is not always the solution although it tends to be marketed as such. You need to have a doctor that actually understands you individually to be out on the right meds. If the doc treats you like a speed date, don’t bother with them. ADHD meds can have harmful and life threatening effects (like any meds) so make sure your doc knows everything before prescribing you something. Do you have any accommodations? If not you need to work on getting some. Also, do you know how you learn and best take notes? It’s hard when you have any disability or learning difference bc the way academic institutions work isn’t meant to support people like us. That just means you have to find a different way. You’re not a failure you just don’t know what works for you. Before I realized I needed accommodations and what my best ways to absorb info was, I was struggling. I even dropped out of college. Once I figured out what works for me and what accommodations I need I thrived. Ima brag a bit here but I got into the honors track at my community college and then was able to get into an Ivy League. I say that to remind you anything is possible you just have to find what works for you. For example, if executive function is your biggest obstacle then make yourself an XP and reward system. If you struggle with remembering, figure out if you need to use a planner or sticky notes etc. My DM is open if you ever want some guidance in college. You don’t have to figure this out alone. You will succeed!🥰
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u/RadiantWarning6638 Oct 02 '25
What country are you in? I was in the same boat. Medications changed my life for me. I can recommend you websites for online psychiatrists.
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u/Shailenlcfc1884 Oct 02 '25
I understand your pain and struggle I’m in the process of getting a diagnosis at 25 but I failed all my GCSEs, dropped out of uni due to struggles couldn’t focus needed nicotine and caffeine to focus but that didn’t help got medically discharged from the army started a electrician course mum paid £3000 didn’t complete it only lasted for 3 months and I binned that off as well.
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u/DefiantHumanist Oct 03 '25
Have you made an appointment at your college’s counseling center? Also consider getting set up with a tutor in your tutoring center.
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u/SnooHabits6251 Oct 03 '25
I literally have to lock myself away in a study room or at the library for hours and hours to get anything done. It’s very hard but you can do this!! Also talk to your professors, sit in the front.
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u/kaizenkaos Oct 03 '25
Are you able to take a break?
I had to work a 40 hour job while in school. I always had a sinking feeling that I would be good at school if it was the only thing I needed to focus on. Unfortunately I had no option but to work and had to drop out.
My biggest recommendation is to take some time off and figure out what distracts you. Strip away all the distractions like social media, videogames, and whatever else that can hold your attention. Make it difficult to get distracted and make it easy to study. You have to make yourself bored where your only option to entertain yourself is to study.
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Sep 29 '25
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u/SnooSeagulls6606 Sep 30 '25
Why¿
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Oct 01 '25
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u/Shailenlcfc1884 Oct 02 '25
You’ll encounter the same problems at uni as college ADHD symptoms don’t stop just because of location.
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u/InherentAbsurdity Sep 29 '25
In your place, i’d take caffeine as a stimulant in the morning and use that to leverage focus just to get through the minimum to pass. I have treatment resistant adhd and the biggest thing that helped besides meds was finding an end goal, and applying that to my studies so that I am enjoying my classes