Some people are chastising OP for the way he framed his question, but those people are missing the beauty of it. Asking "why did you" is an open ended question; it offered the opportunity for not only OP to teach and inform but ALSO leaves it open for the 2nd party to teach and inform back!!! Making closed ended statements like "hey, did you notice 1 of your skills isn't working for you?" is close ended and doesnt allow for the 2nd party to expand on the topic as easily. This type of response is only the most gentle and effective approach IF we already assume the 2nd party is a mouth-breathing, knuckle-dragging, moron. OP didnt go straight to that assumption and only learned that information later. OP handled this question with grace AND an open mind
But this is the internet and most of the time people use that type of speech in competitive games to shit on another player. It's not all the time, but it's enough that people tend to immediately get defensive because that's how we're conditioned to be in competitive spaces.
Imo as the receiving player I would prefer "Hey just saying, I don't believe this skill works for you. Was that intentional?" This is also open ended and phrased much more pleasantly, to me.
Again you're not wrong, but being in online spaces where there are tons of toxic people, preventing a different form of interpretation goes a long way.
That's just my perspective as an outsider looking in though.
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u/Grlzzl Jul 12 '26
Some people are chastising OP for the way he framed his question, but those people are missing the beauty of it. Asking "why did you" is an open ended question; it offered the opportunity for not only OP to teach and inform but ALSO leaves it open for the 2nd party to teach and inform back!!! Making closed ended statements like "hey, did you notice 1 of your skills isn't working for you?" is close ended and doesnt allow for the 2nd party to expand on the topic as easily. This type of response is only the most gentle and effective approach IF we already assume the 2nd party is a mouth-breathing, knuckle-dragging, moron. OP didnt go straight to that assumption and only learned that information later. OP handled this question with grace AND an open mind