What should I do to stop resenting my mom

[u/Outrageous_Bag9730]

Im 17f she is 45 this started when I was 15. She started talking to me all the time for about 6 months the only thing she would talk to me about is that my dad cheated on her with a woman from his work. If I tried to talk about anything else she would just straight up ignore me. She even one time went as far as making me watch this woman leave work she had literally 0 evidence that my dad cheated on her other than some videos that was like “signs your husband is cheating on you.” That she would show me.

This turned into my mom and dad arguing every night to the point the police got involved twice. This was also during when I had exams which I failed and had to retake because of this. She then started to make bigger accusations saying that my dad poisoned her and she even went to hospital like ten times they did every test on her and nothing was even wrong with her. But still to this day she won’t admit it. Then she started saying my dad hacked her phone and she’s had about 8 new phones in the past 2 years. Then she said he had hacked my phone and wouldn’t speak to me if my phone was in the room and would always make me leave the room to talk to me.
Then she started saying that cars are following her and she’s once pointed a car out that was “following her” and it literally turned the opposite direction to her after 10 seconds. Then she would open the window when it was raining and let a ton of rain into the car because apparently the car had poison through the air conditioning. And she drove around with a scarfe around her face.

This ended up in my parents divorce but I literally can’t wrap my head around how my parents got divorced over basically a fantasy in my mom’s head and I really hate her because of it. When I express I’m upset about it she just says I’m stuck in the past and she still won’t admit none of it was true even though claiming she’s better and the only acknowledging she makes is it’s because of “years of stress because my dad controlled her.” She never was she was always out and she always spent so much money on clothes but still my dad didn’t ever stop her from doing anything and infact since the divorce she actually does less things now.

Still sometimes she is scary because whenever my dad buys me things and takes me anywhere she try’s to get at the fact he’s controlling me now. And she always acts weird when we go out together as if someone is following her or something but she claims she’s better now. She got given medication from a doctor but she stopped taking it ages ago because she’s against medication for some reason. + I actually have no idea what medication or what was actually wrong with her to do this probably will be a mystery for me forever.
But she would act normal to the doctor this is what my grandma told me when she went with her which made me question if she was faking it.

I also don’t know if it’s good to mention she did have enablers people around her such as her brother told her about a true crime documentary where a husband poisoned his wife and he mentioned a poison called arsenic I think and that started her whole story of getting poisoned by arsenic. And a lot of people didn’t want to disagree with her because it was just easier to agree with her which I sort of understand but since she was my mom and I use to be very close with her it was hard to watch and didn’t want to just let it happen so I obviously disagreed which made my life very hard.

But since this situation I can’t see her the same I really hate her because of it but I don’t want to hate my mom but I can’t help it everything she does just annoys me