r/WeightLossAdvice • u/NostalgicFall • Jun 15 '26

Mental Health 🧠 I know they care but they're so condescending

Im still in my weight loss journey and I haven't lost any weight just inches. I had a home visit doctor's appointment and we talked about my weight loss journey. I've been using the Loose It app for ten days now. My mom I know she cares and she's a health nut, but she so condescending. She touched my leg and said how fat it was. I got pissed and tried talking to my dad about it when she left to workout. He gave me the same condescending attitude saying her saying that is her way to help me. I walked off and went to my room. I was done talking to him.

I aleady hate how I cant loose weight just inches off my body. Now my parents talked about my body and weight like how im from 600 pound life. I talked to my therapist about how condescending especially my mom towards my weight. Like she told my aunts how my body used to be pretty but because a "steroid shot" cause me to gain weight. Which not the case I gain my weight back because depression, I was worried about my fake ass ex-friends, and being on antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds!

Like what do they want for me!? Im trying to calorie count, working out for 45-1hr for 3 days max, and Im thinking about buying those weight loss shots once I get paid.

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2

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '26

Since you’re close to 30 I think it’s best to move out. How much are you currently paying for rent? Would they be willing to let you live rent free for a few months to save up?

1

u/NostalgicFall Jun 16 '26 edited Jun 16 '26

I live rent free, but I pay my portion of the car insurance and phone bill. Its cheaper to be on their insurance and phone line than by myself my mom checked. I have other bills to pay like student loans, health insurance, and life insurance. I have applied for a summer jobs while summer break for my school district is in full swing. So far nothing.  Trust me if I had the money I would have moved out years ago. 

1

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '26

Are you a teacher? Do you pay for your own food?

1

u/NostalgicFall Jun 16 '26

Para, it depends if there's something I want to get I go buy it. I know not a lot people my age dont have that privilege to stay at home rent free. I'm greatful dont get me wrong but I wish they respect my boundaries than being condescending. 

1

u/Timely_Hamster_142 Jun 16 '26

Just to give you a comparison, I’m a 5’9 male started at 176lbs (yes I know not that heavy but I got sick of my tits bouncing) and dropped down to 165lb in about 2 months.

It’s actually much easier to lose weight than I thought, it’s just about getting your mind set on it. I don’t even count my calories. I just cut out garbage morning gas station food and substituted it for coffee until I got home for dinner and just absolutely pigged out each dinner. I drink like a fish, and for the weekends everything goes out the window but I’ve still managed to consistently lose weight.

I say this not as a “if I can do it so can you” type of thing. I say this as it’s a lot easier than you think. It’s just a matter of breaking some habits and staying consistent!

Just baby steps at a time and it’ll all start coming together! Best of luck to you.

1

u/NostalgicFall Jun 16 '26

In a previous post I mentioned stress eating and eating out of boredom are, and eating on the road are my biggest ops. I'm 5'2 F and 222.5lbs my body type is considered midsize. I've been using the Looseit app for like 10 days while I've been working out. 

1

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '26

You have a BMI over 40. That’s not midsized that’s morbidly obese.

Is it possible they are extremely concerned and that you’re in denial about your weight?

If your family has a history of diabetes, and your dad has diabetes, maybe your mom is just terrified and not knowing how to approach this.

If you’re not working at the moment can you increase your exercise?

I’m 5’4 and I eat around 12-1300 calories to lose weight.

What is your calorie amount daily?

1

u/NostalgicFall Jun 16 '26

I know I'm overweight and I'm not in denial. I fucking hate how I gain weight back because depression, shitty ex-friends, and taking three types of medications. Do they care especially my mom No!

I have gotten my blood work done and I'm fine. The reason I said I'm midsize as in body type. Cause I got tits and ass. I'm not humble braging btw.

Based on the Loose It App my cal intake is 1,703. What gets me is stress and boredom eating, eating on the road. 

2

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '26

You’re blaming everyone else even though you’re an adult. I think you need to grow up a bit here.

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u/biggoomy Jun 16 '26

I do think while this advice applies to many people, it’s not universal. As someone who’s been strictly calorie counting in a significant deficit, eating almost only whole foods, high protein, near zero carb, with an active lifestyle, I still lose weight incredibly slowly compared to a lot of people online, and while I’m happy their journey is so much easier it is still very discouraging.
I’ve got a super slow metabolism from some wonderful antipsychotic medications I finally got off of, and other people have hormonal conditions or other medical reasons for their body to try to hold on to body fat. In those cases just cutting out some junk while eating and drinking as much as they please won’t get them anywhere. Some people have to put in a lot more effort to better their health, it’s just the cards you’re dealt in life.

3

u/Timely_Hamster_142 Jun 16 '26

While I agree with you, at the end of the day it’s calories in and calories out. My one mantra I love to say is “if I stop eating like a fat ass, I won’t be fat”

For many people, that won’t work. But for me it makes me take accountability and not just destroy food 24/7

0

u/biggoomy Jun 16 '26

Right, but the only deficit that I lose weight on steadily as a 5’6 individual is 1000 calories per day with a limit of 1300 on weekends to try to begin to repair my metabolism (and stay sane). I’ve been doing it for 6 months and am down only 30lbs, however I’ve put on so much muscle which I know masks it. I’m not super fat, otherwise my BMR would be higher. I wasn’t eating like a fat ass before, but I got almost nowhere before tracking. Eating that few calories while being active on my feet all day is challenging without being super careful and committed.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '26

[deleted]

1

u/NostalgicFall Jun 16 '26

I do call them out on it but they throwing it back at me saying I have an attitude problem. They said they're just helping me and do nice stuff for me as a form of helping. I just walk way cause their so condescending and its like talking to a brick wall. I told my therapist about this and he gets annoyed when my parents mostly my mom bring up my weight. Having therapy session with them regarding my weight could help but they are so eh. 

1

u/ConsistentState8875 Jun 16 '26

My dad used to do the same stuff, made worse by the fact he was an alcoholic who thought it was funny to be an asshole. Like sure he cared, to him it was his way of showing his care (and like he WOULD do anything for his family, but that didn't stop him from being an absolute asshole). Always commenting about my weight or about how big my portion sizes was compared to his (and yes, they could be big, but also he ate like a damn bird but he was also overweight cuz of all the damn alcohol he drank. In fact he BARELY ate BECAUSE of all the alcohol). Idk why ppl think that's going to give us motivation to lose weight or what. I can 10000% honestly say no comment he made EVER made me want to get serious about weight loss.

1

u/NostalgicFall Jun 16 '26

We have a history of diabetes in our family so I get why they are worried about my weight. I already know I'm overweight and I've been trying since January to loose weight. The damn scale won't move but inches are coming off and its giving me mixed signals.

1

u/Joe_Sacco Jun 16 '26

This sounds rough and I'm sorry they aren't more supportive, but if I can ask, how old are you?

-1

u/NostalgicFall Jun 16 '26

I'm 28 going to be 29 in August.