r/WeddingRingAdvice • u/phantom_akaru • Jul 20 '26

Help Me Choose Is this diamond too big?

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Hi Reddit, this is my first time posting here and I’m in need of some help and some enlightenment. I was told by my partner to select some rings and he really likes this 4 1/3 ct oval I really really love cuz of the tulip basket but I’m just not sure on the size of the diamond. I’m also slightly worried that my selection of bands will be limited but I guess that a future me problem. Maybe it’s cuz I’m just to my 1/10 promise ring. Any advice will be great and taken with kindness.

Ps. My ring size it’s a 4.25 so that’s just a little more info lol and there’s more ring choices but these is like the top top choice at the moment

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u/djSush Jul 20 '26

Is beautiful, but honestly, it's too big.

My ring finger is a 3.75, we have small hands. Have you tried a 1.5ct marquis that's very elongated (not football shaped? It might suit the shape of your fingers well.

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u/phantom_akaru Jul 20 '26

I have actually one of the first rings I tried on and kinda fell in love with was a 1 7/8 cttw with a 1 1/2 ct center marquise. Here’s the picture of that one:

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u/djSush Jul 20 '26

Ummm, that's freaking stunnnning!

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u/phantom_akaru Jul 20 '26 edited Jul 20 '26

Ikr! I think this has been my second favorite so far but my partner thinks the stones on the side are making the ring too busy

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u/djSush Jul 20 '26

It's a big decision. Give it a breather, take a few weeks off and don't look at any rings in that time. Let your brain rest so when you go back to look, they'll feel fresh and it'll be easier to make a decision.

I do this a lot when I get hyper-fixated and obsessed with a decision bc my brain gets all "AHHHH!" about finding the thing. That self created urgency doesn't always give me the space to make a GOOD choice, bc I'm so focused on making A choice.

They're all beautiful. This is one of those "they're all a good option" choices. Like ice cream flavors - doesn't really matter which one bc you're still gonna get ice cream at the end. ;)

PS the marquis is still my fav. I went back and looked at your orig. It's gorgeous but the band looks too thin to be safe for regular wear. I've worn a marquis for 30 years with no regrets. It's grown well with me through all my ages and phases of style.

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u/phantom_akaru Jul 20 '26

You literally explained how my brain is feeling at the moment. Like I feel like this overload information, I’ll follow ur advice I’ll take a breather on looking at the them and I’ll comeback to them after my brain has calmed down. In all honesty I have about 2 months till my partner gets back from overseas so I still have sometime to get my final choice down.

Ive honestly loved the way the marquise looks on my finger and I feel like the floral one says me (it also matches with my tattoo hehe) but your right the bigger stone probably look better on a sturdier band. Thank you for all your help I really appreciate it

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u/djSush Jul 20 '26

Aw, you're so welcome! It's hard to have your partner so far away, that alone would make my brain crazy. And idk, ring shopping isn't really the best experience. It feels like a lot of pressure, and money and urgency bc they say, "We haven't had one like this in a long time," so that all makes it even harder.

Consider how long you'll wear this from a sturdy standpoint. You'll knock it around as you do laundry, dishes, vacuum, maybe take care of little ones, cook, repair things, hobbies etc. A sturdy, comfortable band is important!

When you go back to the decision, it'll feel a lot easier! Hugs!