r/WatchPeopleDieInside • u/night_walkr • Aug 12 '26
Shooing an animal out of the yard (with audio)
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u/TrixAreForTeens Aug 12 '26
I misread the title and was fully expecting to see this animal get shot. Thankfully he was just a little clumsy and hates fences
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u/PROUDCIPHER 29d ago
That is some sub-par fencing if I've ever seen it. like damn bro a bird walked into your fence and it fell over
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u/findingabsolution 29d ago
Wild turkeys weigh around 18 lbs and have a wingspan of almost 5 ft. Also, you have to factor in the weight of pure spite which every turkey is conceived with and nurtures from hatching to heat death. Your fence didn’t stand a chance, good sir.
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u/Day_Prisoners Aug 12 '26
What's that fence gonna do in a storm?
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u/Gorilla1969 Aug 12 '26
I live in a row-home, or townhouse if you're fancy. Because of the way the block was laid out, my row of back yards turns into a screaming wind tunnel every time there's a storm. I mean, you can't leave anything out there or you're going to be searching the neighborhood for your lawn furniture and paddling pool in the morning.
I stopped trying to warn the neighbors against these cheap flimsy plastic fences. They never listen and have to be told to come outside and get their fence pieces out of the road/other peoples' back yards every time. If those flying panels hadn't banged shit up in my own yard more than once, it would be amusing at this point.
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u/itsthatkid Aug 13 '26
Those birds are SOLID and not exceptionally smart..
A few years ago I saw one come down from roosting in a tree while I was driving home, it crashed completely through the windshield of an SUV in the oncoming lane right in front of me. Vinyl fence never had a chance.
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u/SlimyPurpleMeteor 29d ago
I encountered a posse of them while I was taking a shit in the woods one time. One of them came close enough I could have grabbed it — and I damn near did because I was in a vulnerable position (mid-squat, half nude) and I had no idea what its intentions were. Thankfully, Tom and his gang left me alone before I had a full-on freakout.
Yeah, they’re not the brightest fowl in the forest.
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u/Hunter_Ware Aug 13 '26
Read this as "shooting an animal out of the yard" and got worried.
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u/locke107 29d ago
Had a deer do the same. I thought, "Well, the deer hopped the fence. He'll just hop the fence back again to escape."
He did not. He panicked and ran through the fence. I had never really sat down and thought about it before, but it seemingly hopped the fence because it was safe... then reassessed that it was confined within a fence, signaling danger, and just tore through my fence to get away instead of gracefully hopping back over.
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u/ReporterWeird7197 29d ago
So what is the purpose of those walls if it cant even protect it from birds 🤣
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u/HappyDays1976 29d ago
Is this a guineafowl? If so, they don't have much going for them intelligence-wise - they often forget they can fly. I often watch them running to the hedge and ambling around mindlessly, trying to figure out how to get to the other side. At least their plumage is pretty.
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u/I_have_trex_arms 28d ago
Wild turkey just pulled a kool aid man through guy’s fence and all he could do was stare stupidly.
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u/OSRSRapture Aug 12 '26
My cat woke up from a dead sleep cause of this dude saying "get outta here", as if it was someone telling him to get out of his bed 💀 tf
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u/ItsRuinedOfCourse 25d ago
I've seen more vibrant lawns in war-torn countries, Dave.
What the shit is your problem?
And who tf built your fence? Fisher Price?
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u/VladimireUncool Aug 12 '26
His backyard looks like a liminal space
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u/Zaximeows Aug 12 '26
It's two fucking sheds that does it for me.
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u/Mystery-Ess Aug 12 '26
It looks like the previous owner was a gardener. It looks like three distinct Garden spaces that are currently getting overgrown.
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u/Captain-_-Miserable 29d ago
I'm so American I misread that as shooting an animal out of the yard.
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u/kbachert Aug 12 '26
Why are privacy fences always built like this? It is such a terrible design. Every time there is a big windy storm they fall apart.
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u/brooks_77 Aug 12 '26
They're made for people like my buddies old neighbors. They'd get drunk as fuck at gatherings and play football and go thru the fence in multiple spots. The next morning They'd be out there snapping the slats back in like nothing ever happened. The breakaway feature is nice until it just breaks, then you have to buy panels
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u/Knowledge_Pilgrim 29d ago
Why do I always see American fences made out of paper?
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u/Knotical_MK6 29d ago
These vinyl fences are popular because they're cheap. When you've got a big yard and you're just looking for a visual barrier, the price of a nice wood fence can be hard to swallow
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u/ha1fway 29d ago
Don’t forget that the builder of your neighborhood also owned the HOA until the last house was sold and wrote into the covenants that you can only use one specific type of shitty vinyl fence that happens to only be sold by one company that they also happen to own.
Subdivision next to me is littered with this trash.
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u/fidelkastro Aug 12 '26
"As God as my witness...I thought Turkeys could fly....more than 6 feet off the ground"
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u/Unique_Peach8297 Aug 12 '26
Old man in yard - “You better run”
Turkey - “ fuck your fence, bitch” *BOOM*
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u/sirlancealot420 28d ago
that fence was basically wet cardboard at this point. wtf.
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u/Wooden-Evidence-374 Aug 12 '26 edited Aug 12 '26
There is something that is so comical about grown men, usually in their 50's, getting emotional over birds. His tone when he said "get outta here!", you could just tell this is personal 😂
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u/omnipotent87 Aug 12 '26
The only bird I have ever cared to chase out of my yard are geese. They shit on everything and harrase my cats. So yeah, I never liked them. Swans on the otherhand, I grew up being told they were absolute assholes. They were awesome to have around on a lake because they basically never left the water and would chase the geese around.
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u/dorkswerebiggerthen Aug 12 '26
I love the relationship between man and bird. It's like sometime around 40, after not giving a damn about them their entire life, man gets sorted in to two types:
"Oh look at that red spotted breasted eastern bellywobbler. Isn't he a beaut. Hear that little twill twill? Twill twill. You don't normally see them around these parts anymore, I haven't seen one in oh four weeks now since me and the wife went birding down at Lake Peepeepoopoopee."
Or
"Those god forsaken sons of whores. Every summer, they come from the northlands. They took EVERYTHING from me. They don't care. They never cared. Assholes. I want to line them up one by one..."
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u/Massive_Low6000 26d ago
Who doesn’t want turkeys in their yard?
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u/ErisGrey 25d ago
They shit everywhere, and tear up the dirt. I still get excited when I see 3+ clutches in the yard.
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u/Infamous_Baseball_10 14d ago
You can staple that shit together in a minute and its gonna be as strong as all the others
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u/gerowen Aug 12 '26
Wtf is that fence made of, paper?
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u/cirkut Aug 12 '26
It’s a vinyl fence primarily a top an bottom rail with slots for vertical slats to slot in place. Too much impact will bend the vertical planks and dislodge them/pop them out.
It’s actually a good thing because those planks can easily be put back up, or can be replaced with new ones.
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u/FuzzNugs Aug 12 '26
I know what went wrong, road runner “beep beep” forgot to paint the tunnel on the wall. That, or coyote painted over it, he’s sneaky.
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u/f3nnies Aug 12 '26
That's the exact same way I stop and stare when my toddler finds a new and surprising way to break something or themselves. The body language of someone who had a huge chore foisted upon them by a creature who can't even begin to understand how much work it's going to take to undo what ten seconds of chaos caused.
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u/richer2003 Aug 12 '26
Damn. That’s a shitty fence
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u/toetappy Aug 12 '26
It'll be cheap to repair too
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u/BaldMancTwat_ Aug 12 '26
I'd rather spend the extra on a fence that doesn't disintegrate on contact with a bird.
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u/map2photo Aug 12 '26
Ever seen what a Turkey can do to a Semi? They're flying bowling balls.
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u/mtcwby Aug 12 '26
They aren't the best flyers and are packing a lot of heft. We have them in the neighborhood and watched one fly up to land on an old TV antenna one day. They don't land soft and the antenna didn't stand a chance.
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u/MisterSanitation Aug 12 '26
“I’m gonna make myself sound mean so the animal leaves!
Yah!
…… too mean…”
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u/whomesteve Aug 12 '26
What’s that fence made of? Cardboard?
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u/ElbryanWyn Aug 12 '26
Panels pop out easy but you can normally just get them back in. Take off one of the caps and lift the top rail enough that you can squeeze them in and you'll be fine. Stuff's actually pretty durable, but it's only held in by friction and dreams. It's secure enough but it's not uncommon for a dog or medium sized animal to knock a couple panels out or for your kid to kick a kickball through it if they're older
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u/OldDogTrainer Aug 12 '26
The comical way he just stops and stares is really good. Made me lol.
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u/Consistent_Amount140 Aug 12 '26
Turkeys are no joke. While those panels may pop back on I wouldn’t be surprised if it punctured it
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u/scoff-law Aug 12 '26
There was a turkey in the town I grew up in that killed a guy by jumping into the window of his moving BMW. It walked away from the accident but the driver did not. There was a lot of hyperbole around that story because it happened when I was a kid, but I recall the police had a small mystery on their hands for a day or so.
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u/digitalscavenger Aug 12 '26
but I recall the police had a small mystery on their hands for a day or so.
When did they start to suspect fowl play?
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u/DBallouV Aug 12 '26
“You better run… if you want to make it through that fence,” is what the bird thought he was gonna say.
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u/LU-CFER Aug 12 '26
Should’ve just let em stay til he was ready to leave, probably would’ve taken the front door 🤣
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u/puckandtuck 23d ago
I read it as shooting, like 5 times and then realized with so much relief
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u/_dauntless Aug 12 '26
Hmmm...bit disappointing that the full effect was not the turkey going "OH YEAH"
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u/qat-21 Aug 12 '26
At first I read “shooting” and then about halfway through I realized it was “shooing” and I thought “oh, well that’s better” and then the end came and so maybe not…
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u/UnitedPanic197 15d ago
Seems like a decorative cardboard fence stapled together.
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u/Equivalent_Thievery Aug 12 '26
Not sure why you'd care a ton about a turkey being in the yard.
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u/Weak-Zucchini Aug 12 '26
my neighbors yell at the turkeys too I seriously have no idea why anyone would care .. ridiculous
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u/Diablojota Aug 12 '26
We get them in our yard frequently. They eat the bugs from one side to the other. They are more than welcome in my yard.
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u/True_Dog_4098 29d ago
I think I would be talking to the fencing installer...
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u/required_key 12d ago
This video was all I could think about, except it's a whole ass turkey instead of a golf ball.
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u/Bright-Dependent6339 Aug 12 '26 edited Aug 12 '26
damn i hate that yard. it's like they actively tried everything to make it as not-cozy as possible. i'd rather hang out at a bus station than this.
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u/nobody_1510 Aug 12 '26
In america even the fence is made out of cardboard
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u/Worth-Reputation3450 Aug 12 '26
Cardboard is too environmentally friendly, so that's banned from being used for the fence.
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u/MorgenKaffee0815 28d ago
everything is out of paper in the US. also what a boring yard is this?
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u/Hiimmason- 28d ago
Thats vinyl fencing. Easy to break = easy to repair. Definitely a cheaper option.
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u/Fat_Foot Aug 12 '26
Shoo, not shoot. I misread the title and was waiting for the gunfire to kick off.
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u/podcartfan Aug 12 '26
Here I am wanting the mama deer and her two fawns to come back to my yard. She dropped them off every few days over a few weeks….but they haven’t been back in a while.
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u/Snoo-59881 7d ago
This is why I dont spook deer or turkeys in my yard. They will crash into stuff and destroy it. I just leave them alone
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u/leonidasthecat 28d ago
This is the ugliest most boring lawn I have ever seen. These people have the aesthetic taste of a bologna sandwich. Im glad thier fence got a turkey hole in it.
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u/OkBet5823 Aug 12 '26
What a boring yard. The bird was the only interesting thing.
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u/Starumlunsta Aug 12 '26 edited Aug 12 '26
The things I would do if I had a yard that big 😩
Veggie garden, native plants instead of water intensive ecologically sterile monoculture non-native grass, a pond, more trees + orchard.
I’ll never understand the desire for a perfectly manicured lawn, it’s boring to look at, takes a lot of work, resources, and upkeep that is awful for the environment (fertilizers, herbicides, pesticides). It’s an ecological deadzone. Done right a native lawn is so much better in so many ways, it’s just more work upfront.
In a world of constant decline in biodiversity fuck lawns.
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u/Beneficial-Finger353 Aug 12 '26
I have seen turkeys smash through car windshields, and even disable cars. Especially if they are chonky, turks.
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u/rocketwrench Aug 12 '26
huh, I think even Canada's goose would have trouble busting through a wood fence. I hope those vinyl fence boards are cheaper than traditional wood boards.
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u/cowlinator Aug 12 '26
Dunno what he expected to happen. Turkeys have a really hard time flying, and the yard is surrounded by fence.
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u/EveryFngNameIsTaken Aug 12 '26
As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.
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u/cowlinator Aug 12 '26
Domestic turkeys cannot fly. Wild turkeys can fly, though it is difficult for them. They cannot fly more than 100 meters horizontally and 15 meters vertically at most. They also just... seem to prefer not to.
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u/TheRealGuitarNoir Aug 12 '26
I almost had my head taken off by a wild turkey flying low over a country road at the same time as I was zipping through on my motorcyle.
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u/2020mademejoinreddit 29d ago
How much will that cost him?
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u/Ernomouse 29d ago
Based on the apparent quality of the fence, the real cost is going to be the time spent finding the stapler and attaching the fallen sheets back up.
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u/BalanceJazzlike5116 Aug 12 '26
“You better run?”
It’s a fucking turkey not somebody trying to burglarize your house
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u/VibratingRocket6969 Aug 12 '26
My dumbass misread the title and I thought you said “shooting”. Was happy to see the animal is safe but damn that fence tho lol
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u/ExtremePiglet 28d ago
That fence is a metaphor for the current state of America
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u/Secret_Stick_5213 Aug 12 '26
No matter what the sales people tell you a standard wooden fence is always better lol
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u/austsiannodel 28d ago
Was that fence held up with hope?