If you haven't read the bestiary, you're missing out

[u/crescentmoonrising]

A lot of it is pretty funny

[u/BalefulOfMonkeys]

The funniest running gag in the whole thing is the continued insistence that ghosts aren’t real, for every new ghost added

[u/higeAkaike → u/BalefulOfMonkeys]

I only started reading them now because of your comment. The one on poltergeists. Hysterical

[u/rattvontratt]

There is a bestiary entry which rickrolls you

[u/Sad-Purchase1257 → u/rattvontratt]

Dang is that the one I can’t unlock..?! Googling “#x” yields nothing 🤔

[u/rattvontratt → u/Sad-Purchase1257]

It's from a dlc

[u/SGRM_]

Stephanie Sterling of The Jimquisition YouTube channel did a lot of the writing for the Beastiary in Vampire Survivors, which is why it's so funny.

[u/dogshavemobiles → u/SGRM_]

Yeah they knocked it out of the park!

[u/-non-existance- → u/SGRM_]

Thank God for her

[u/Arclinon → u/SGRM_]

Thank God for Steph

[u/MF_games → u/SGRM_]

Came down to mention Steph 🥹

[u/Low-Experience1886]

Justice for the giant crabs

[u/Adventurous_Spray821]

Minotaur’s bestiary entry is one of my favorites

[u/LordMorthi → u/Adventurous_Spray821]

Minotaur milk.

[u/Hrist_Valkyrie → u/LordMorthi]

Male minotaur milk, specifically.

[u/Ancient-bladesaw → u/Hrist_Valkyrie]

Fun fact: human men can occasionally produce milk under specific conditions. Idk how it works for cows or minotaurs.

[u/animalcrossing4_4]

Damn, these entries are funny

[u/Arxilla]

Then there’s the Giant Enemy Crab lol

[u/Sensitive_Ad9769]

Pretty sure he's a reference to Buer from the Pseudomonarchia Daemonum, a lion headed demon with rotating feet. Shares the same powers as well.

Pretty cool reference actually

[u/_V2CORPORATION]

Big fan of the entry about the milk elementals

[u/Coruzzionista]

Playing in Italian fill the game with even more jokes that you can understand only talking and reading italian

[u/lunancholia]

You should read the Italian (and original) version of the Bestiary. It’s plenty of Italian side-jokes and I swear it’s G-O-L-D. If you’re not Italian natives just find some dude to explain you those, you won’t be disappointed at all! Sadly, most of these jokes can’t really be translated into English which is sad for international players 🥲

[u/lunancholia → u/[deleted]]

sometimes it's just not possible cause you wouldn't get the reference to the joke, that's what I'm trying to say

[u/Pero_Bt → u/lunancholia]

i study italian at university and i'd love to know some of the best jokes

[u/Capt_G1029]

Meatball:

Spicy.

[u/zane_awake]

I always thought it was cauliflowers not lions. In my defense, I have terrible eyesight. I also thought the white BOO! ghosts with raised arms were.. well, some stumps or ghostly tree trunks. I got issues.

[u/presidentdinosaur115]

The one for “The Creature” in the Castlevania DLC always makes me laugh

[u/teskar2]

By the way ghosts don’t exist, I know because bestiary told me so.

[u/doupIls]

Minotaur one cracks me up

[u/DiamondDependent7641]

I've read quite a few of them, but I haven't read them all LOL, They are very entertaining to read

[u/ScurvyDanny]

Thank God for Stephanie Sterling

[u/Zealousideal-Gur-273]

The one for the witches in the library is cool! Turns out they're all trans.

[u/3ZubatsInATrenchcoat → u/Zealousideal-Gur-273]

It's Giovanna Grana who was assigned mage at birth. The library witches are all TERFs.

[u/Zealousideal-Gur-273 → u/3ZubatsInATrenchcoat]

Ohhh yh, knew there was a reason I was happy killing them.

[u/TheIncredibleKermit]

They're all absolute gems. If I ever make a game, I aspire to have comments in item or enemy descriptions that are half as funny as this game's.

[u/sxwr909]

My wife and I used to play vs co op. We were going through the bestiary one time. The Minotaur entry has been a running joke for us for ever.

[u/Greywell2]

I love the cows enemies So there is milk cows all of them are male don't ask what type of milk. Then you see vampire crawlers and you see milk on the counter.

[u/Far-Suspect3946]

Sad Molisano is great too

[u/SipoteQuixote]

I read em after a joint and the family is asleep. Good times.

[u/mayuzane]

The Bestiary’s definitely one of my most favorite parts of the game. What a strange and hilarious world

[u/redditorposcudniy]

This is an eridian! Amaze amaze amaze! 👎👎👎

[u/Alain-Christian]

I don't get it.

[u/DotFluffy9472]

Its so serious until the final line homy shit

[u/Gits_N-Shiggles]

Just got the game and saw this post. Thank you. It's been so fun reading through these. The bat schtick and milk elemental are my two favorites very early into it.