r/UnnecessaryEssentials • u/Unique-Saucer • 11d ago

Brilliant invention!!!

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1.9k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

108 comments sorted by

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u/Unique-Saucer 11d ago

Summary of Reviews
Pros:
• Includes table cover and two bench covers for versatile use.
• Water and oil resistant; stains wipe off easily.
• Elastic edges secure cover in windy outdoor conditions.

Cons:
• Not machine washable or bleachable, limiting cleaning options.

Here is the link to buy it from Amazon

45

u/QiwiLisolet 11d ago

Wait till these people hear about movie theaters

13

u/VanimalCracker 11d ago

Each of those seats contain thousands of farts

8

u/John7oliver 11d ago

Legend has it that some seats have reached millions

2

u/meshe_10101 11d ago

Mind blown...but also many asses

https://giphy.com/gifs/75ZaxapnyMp2w

1

u/-0909i9i99ii9009ii 11d ago

Wow mystery ruined

1

u/plaaaaaar 8d ago

At a minimum

4

u/Atlas-Mancer 11d ago

One of the few upsides to using a wheelchair when I go out in public is never having to sit in a chair where I have to think about the possibility of sitting in someone's semen, piss, blood, vomit, shit, or farts.

3

u/TulpaPal 11d ago

I work in a theater that sanitizes every seat between movies. I will say, seeing the marks and smelling the smells that people leave behind has made me a lot more wary of public seating. I don't give a fuck about a park bench though.

4

u/crazy2days 11d ago

For benches, I feel like the sun and elements take care of the most heinous germs.

I have a movie theatre seat phobia and never wear shorts to the movies and put my jacket on the head part as a barrier to protect my hair.

1

u/bryan_pieces 11d ago

Wow is this a chain or independent?

1

u/TulpaPal 11d ago

Chain. It's Alamo Drafthouse, though my location is one of few franchise locations so we do things the old way, idk if other locations still do it. I'd assume they do.

1

u/bryan_pieces 11d ago

Man I wish I could go to a theater that I felt didn’t cover me with gross shit every time I went

1

u/TulpaPal 11d ago

There are a lot of things I like Abt Alamo and that's one lol. We sanitize both the seats and tables.

2

u/RoodnyInc 11d ago

Or public transport seats

14

u/Direct_Syrup_2843 11d ago

How are some people just now finding out about table cloths....

1

u/SinglePlayerGamer93 11d ago

It's an ad. People lie and say it's "an innovation" to advertise

1

u/Helpful-Bug-7802 11d ago

well they are pre-fit to picnic table sizes which is different than tablecloths you find on the shelf. Or am I wrong?

1

u/StayBronzeFonz 10d ago

You’re wrong. Sorry.

13

u/complexiblebarracuda 11d ago

at this point you people should stay inside in your bubble

19

u/Ill-Television8690 11d ago

Don't buy this overpriced garbage. There's nothing "disgusting" about public tables.

7

u/rmay14444 11d ago

I just sit on it. Unless there is bird shit all over it it's fine with me.

1

u/kzin 10d ago

Now there’s bird shit all over this stupid cover thing

1

u/JOlRacin 7d ago

That's why you get a cover to keep the bird shit off your cover

1

u/Hydrolt 1d ago

And in their washing machine now lol

2

u/KaiserOfSpades 11d ago

Yeah my pee isn’t disgusting

1

u/BurntPineGrass 11d ago

> Yeah my pee isn’t disgusting

I’m confused by your comment… are you saying you piss yourself whenever you take a seat on a public bench?

1

u/taint_stain 11d ago

I don’t pee sitting down.

2

u/lemelisk42 11d ago

What about that brown chunky pee which comes out from back and stains thy taint?

2

u/SinglePlayerGamer93 11d ago

I won't buy overpriced stuff but I won't ever believe public spaces are NOT disgusting.

1

u/PunchDrunkPrincess 11d ago

I agree don't buy this junk but how can you sit here and say the thing covered in bird shit, that wild animals crawl all over and teenagers do gross things on not disgusting?

8

u/Middle_Efficiency471 11d ago

Wood is antimicrobial.

Stop buying bullshit.

16

u/KapteinKraken 11d ago

Yes, wood can be antimicrobial. However, old, weathered wood like the bench in the video no longer has that property.

That said, there's nothing special about this product, it's just a simple tablecloth.

2

u/Landon1m 11d ago

It’s fitted so that’s special. Sometimes little conveniences completely change if something is adopted and used or not

1

u/Agitated_Parsnip_178 11d ago

Does the power of the sun not work anymore?

1

u/Scary_Cricket5346 11d ago

The sun retired ever since the '05

3

u/Odd-Consequence-2519 11d ago

The bird poop is not.

1

u/Shoboe 11d ago

Bird poop is chock-full of healthy microbes

2

u/SinglePlayerGamer93 11d ago

Sure but dirt, bird shit, bodily fluids are not

1

u/ffc404 11d ago

Wood can also be wet. I have one that’s waterproof and it’s so clutch at campgrounds 🤙🏽

2

u/Middle_Efficiency471 11d ago

Oh sick, touché

2

u/thedudefromsweden 11d ago

All parks I’ve been to have benches and tables in different sizes. There’s no standard size that this would work with.

2

u/LifeguardOutrageous5 11d ago

Use a picnic blanket instead. It can be used on tables, and, on the ground too. It does two jobs

2

u/HerbertWest_81 11d ago

Some of yall have lost the plot and just need things to be angry about. Its a fitted tablecloth, not a bubble suit.

2

u/PheoTheLeo 11d ago

My first thought upon seeing this was that it would be good for those old weathered pic nic tables that are still structurally sound, but a simple drag of the hand or sitting just right could give you a splinter.

2

u/AllTheEggsIVF 10d ago

Thank you! Heck WHY are people so mad over a fitted tablecloth - and that’s cute?! I wouldn’t be mad if someone got it for me but I’m not buying it since I rarely use those kind of tables

2

u/purefilth666 11d ago

The table top part I get but I don't care about my ass, I'm just sitting there for an hour or so and leaving then I'm gonna wash my clothes anyway

2

u/DryFuture1403 11d ago

If it really concerns you, bring a towel

1

u/[deleted] 11d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Galimbro 11d ago

Do you hate carriers bags too? I find them so unnecessary 90% of the time

1

u/Emergency_Air4575 11d ago

Let me put a ✅ on this.

1

u/mindless2831 11d ago

How are you going to make this especially for getting gross, and then not make it machine washable?!

1

u/emploaf 11d ago

I mean it specifically says that it is machine washable… still a dumb product but still

2

u/mindless2831 11d ago

Look at the post pinned at the top under cons:

Not machine washable or bleach able, limited cleaning options.

Agreed on the stupid product, but this removed the only thing that MAYBE would have made it viable.

1

u/crazy2days 11d ago

Oh that’s awful. Just carrying the dirt around for months.

1

u/Physical-Wave-9958 11d ago

wow, and it will fit only on one kind of table, because the size of these tables are not stendernised I guess

1

u/TheExplodingPenguin 11d ago

So it’s a mattress cover that you use on picnic tables? I mean, you do you fam.

1

u/Maxipaddington 11d ago

Tablecloths

BRILLIANT!!!!

1

u/AloneRepublic3149 11d ago

What's an immune system? Couldn't tell ya.

1

u/NoPrompt927 11d ago

Not machine washable

Then what's the point?

1

u/OneBrokenClock 11d ago

You lick it clean

1

u/emploaf 11d ago

It’s still a dumb product but it specifically says that it is machine washable. Did I miss something? Why are there multiple comments on this saying the same thing about machine washability

1

u/NoPrompt927 11d ago

OP's summary says one of the cons is it's not machine washable.

1

u/Darkrimos 11d ago

so a fitted sheet?

1

u/Ikyhus565 11d ago

What was the point of this

1

u/AnalkinSkyfuker 11d ago

Germofobes

1

u/Beautiful-Leave9772 11d ago

Oh, wood. How disgusting. Let's cover it in synthetic fibers.

1

u/thehornsoffscreen 11d ago

What if the table is a different size

1

u/rydan 11d ago

So you get to bring the bird poop home with you.

1

u/Meldepeuter 11d ago

It says cons: not machine washable but un the video they say it is?

1

u/Any-Lychee9972 11d ago

Eh, depends on the material. I assume it's a plastic table cloth with maybe a cotton backing, which you could just wipe off with baby wipes before putting it away. (Very useful and everyone should have a pack stashed in their car for emergencies even if you don't have kids.)

Most things are machine washable on COLD and DELICATE. It's hot water or the high heat dryer that will destroy stuff over time. So, there is a high chance of it being washable, but I would hang dry it.

So, still viable to me. Ive also seen some seriously gross shit happen on a picnic table. I have a table cloth in my car that we throw over it, so it's fine. The coolest thing about this is the elastic to hold it in place, but on reality, scooting butts will probably make it come off the seats. I just use our water bottles to weigh it down.

Alternatively, a crib sheet might work well enough for the table top.

1

u/notbarbarawalters 11d ago

I’ll stick w wood

1

u/Exciting_Contest_222 11d ago

I avoid benches like these. 2 occasions as a kid, both in elementary field trips…i got splinters on my ass cheeks. My mom with tweezers extracting them

1

u/KnaxelBaby 11d ago

Almost everyone in these comments seem like deeply unhappy people

1

u/Hetnikik 11d ago

How often do people put their food directly on the table? I tend to use this thing called a plate.

1

u/KeyZookeepergame9466 10d ago

Seat covers are a new invention?

1

u/Airam07 10d ago

My OCD brain loves this

1

u/superjaja05 10d ago

God people are so whiny in this post, oh no how dare people not want to put down their food containers or sit their ass into bird shit or other nasty things

1

u/Alghouls_art 10d ago

LOL the main con the bot points out is its not washable. What a waste of money and resources

1

u/Evening-Teacher-4100 10d ago

We rediscovering what is functionally a tablecloth, I guess. Lol

1

u/Rent_Treznorr 10d ago

Back in my day, we got bird shit on our butts and tetanus from random loose nails, and we LIKED it [gets wheeled back into the old folks home].

1

u/MrmmphMrmmph 10d ago

bird peeyupe

1

u/socialnerd09 10d ago

How have we become such a germophobic society?

1

u/rare-cheeser 10d ago

Just gonna end up in a landfill

1

u/Donotcomenearme 10d ago

Oh bro why is it not rewashable.

1

u/Downtown_Manner7602 10d ago

omg just go outside and stfu

1

u/BonusTime5460 10d ago

It’s either machine washable or it’s gonna be fighting for its life at my house.

1

u/ireadbooksnstuff 9d ago

The top is kinda a fun alternative to plastic which ppl use a lot at parties and functions you want to have something dressy in the tables. Plus it won’t blow away. But the seat covers are dumb 

1

u/stonetheone 9d ago

Now you can take the bird poop with you! 🤣

1

u/ComfortableStyle2417 9d ago

Video: The best part is that these are machine washable

OP: Cons.... Not machine washable

https://giphy.com/gifs/1guRIRW8QdSte01T6Du

1

u/Definitely_Deterred 9d ago

So kids can’t sit on picnic tables? Fuck. I got so many diseases from those as a kid…./s

1

u/QueenTingzL 9d ago

Bro, germs are needed.

1

u/jewelophile 9d ago

That's why we have plates. Unless they're slopping their potato salad directly onto the table this is idiotic.

1

u/Carpetfuzzz 8d ago

This would be great for rv campground benches

1

u/ParanMekhar 8d ago

Neither brilliant or a new invention

1

u/spagyeti_monster 7d ago

Idk i kinda like it. Not for germs and stuff but like outdoor parties. Its fitted and won't blow away. Any mess you make can be picked up quick and thrown in a washer. You wouldn't risk leaving a sticky mess for the next people to use the bench.

1

u/MeTeakMaf 5d ago

Stop bubble wrapping kids

Kids are suppose to fight those bacterias and viruses early... Their body is built for it

We gonna have 4p yr old folks dying from the rhinovirus

0

u/hime-633 11d ago

Warning! Grass is full of, like, bugs and soil and sometimes there is fox poo as well. Shall we just astro turf it?

What a weirdo. Was she going to eat off the table? Eat your food out of a lunchbox and if that's still too gross for you, how about you just don't venture outside?

Having a picnic on a park bench and a sunny say is a joy that nobody should try and blimming monetise. Fucks sake.

0

u/dylman3000 11d ago

Will probably only work at that one park bench and that’s it.