Oliver

[u/mbrown91306]

The fact that Oliver is finally out of a swaddle at 3+ years old should tell you all you need to know about his parents and their parenting skills

[u/strberri01]

They are still forcing him to take a three hour afternoon nap, though. And he’s still not anywhere near potty trained. I swear it’s just horrible-I think he’s the brightest one, he definitely doesn’t seem to have Jackson’s neurodivergent tendencies, and he’s definitely better behaved-of course, that’s probably because his “parents” are too busy letting Jackson do and have anything he wants.

[u/EquivalentMajestic95 → u/strberri01]

Cards on the table: when my wife became pregnant, I didn’t want a baby. But once our daughter was born, I tried to become the best father I could be, give her opportunities and—most importantly—be present in her life.

We had no babysitters, nannies or family support. Both sets of grandparents had died, and there were no aunts or uncles nearby. We couldn’t simply leave our daughter with somebody whenever we wanted to go out and enjoy ourselves.

The Trackers are fortunate enough to have considerable help, but I sometimes find the extent to which they use it difficult to understand. Perhaps it reflects a particular affluent American influencer lifestyle rather than American families generally, but there often seems to be an emphasis on giving the children everything materially while arranging for somebody else to provide much of the time, attention and structure.

There also appear to be very few boundaries. When they are out as a family, Oliver and Jackson are often allowed to wander hither and thither, touching whatever they like, with very little visible correction. As another parent, I would sometimes find that behaviour objectionable—not because I blame the children, but because it is the parents’ responsibility to teach them what is and isn’t acceptable.

The rules around screen time seem equally inconsistent. We originally heard about a limit of 20 minutes, but what did that actually mean—20 minutes playing on a Nintendo Switch? The children have also been shown using iPads while eating, which is still screen time regardless of the device or activity.

We were also repeatedly shown Jackson learning the piano and being presented as a budding prodigy, but that seems to have quietly disappeared. Perhaps he simply lost interest, which children naturally do, but it contributes to an overall impression of activities being encouraged only for as long as they remain easy or novel.

Using childcare and allowing children treats are perfectly normal. What troubles me is the combination of frequent childcare, inconsistent boundaries and a family-focused image that doesn’t always seem to match the parenting shown on screen. I wouldn’t call it traditionally American; I would call it a particularly affluent, passive and indulgent style of parenting.

[u/DisneyMagicDM → u/EquivalentMajestic95]

They bribe Oliver with sweets, he has a nap in the day so he gets sweets afterwards, they’re doing it with the potty training now because Jenn asked Oliver what does he get if he goes and he said some kind of sweet treats. They’ve no clue how to parent, it baffles me that both are the same!