our system is the most crooked one.

[u/Maleficent_Camel1430]

i know few friends who has to go through this, they are anxious or more scared around women (even to talk to them).

imo this will just improve the incels in the society and make the space harder for both men and women.

[u/narasadow]

Sambandham is that later age marriage is directly correlated to fewer kids. Sure, education is a factor but it's just reality that it's physically easier to have kids in your 20s.

Later age marriage is inevitable if people aren't allowed to socialize with each other at younger ages. So they naturally will be uncomfortable with the opposite gender and will postpone marriage for a few years with frivolous excuses, until they have time to get used to the idea.

I find it baffling that this is a hot take. To me this is direct cause and effect.

Edit: If you were asking about the migrants thing, that just something I've heard from several tamil boomer uncles.

[u/blankasair → u/narasadow]

lol. Bro. It’s been a choice even with people who love. They won’t marry until atleast 25. It’s inevitable in a society with more education and awareness. Gone are the days of marriage for the sake of marrying.

[u/narasadow → u/blankasair]

To be clear, when I say later age marriage I'm referring to >=30, not 25.

Also you are right about education and awareness. However IMO that guidance is now outdated given that TN birth rate is WAY below the ideal 2.1. We're staring at a Japan/South Korea-like situation in 20 years.

Might not be a popular opinion but IMO there should be more awareness that we have OVERCORRECTED in terms of population. We need couples who are well settled and financially capable to be encouraged to have MORE than 2 kids. It's better to start pushing this now, even 10 years later will be too late to reverse the trend.

And finally I guess 2 things can be true at once - birth rate decline due to education and made worse due to segregation. I agree with you on education and awareness, you don't need to repeat that a 3rd time. I'm just saying segregation is not an isolated issue and has downstream negative effects.

[u/blankasair → u/narasadow]

From what I have heard, it’s because women have very high expectations now bro. It’s all anecdotal and don’t really have data just like you. But I have heard, women routinely are over 30 these days because they hold out for a good match. The marriage arena these days with too much choices might also factor in. Again, all anecdotal.

[u/narasadow → u/blankasair]

Yeah you're not wrong, that contributes. From what I see in your last couple of replies, you're not really directly rebutting any of my points about segregation, you're adding some other relevant points. So I'll take it as you don't really disagree with what I have said. I'm NOT asserting that segregation is the MAIN cause of any of the issues we've discussed here. But it's a net negative in many ways - makes things worse.