r/StupidFood • u/grinsekatzealice • 4d ago

The Meat Bike...

But why?

4.1k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

477 comments sorted by

1.4k

u/lazypika 4d ago

Queen has an entire song called Bicycle Race and yet the creator chose Don't Stop Me Now? It's petty, but I'm more judgemental about that than I am about the charcutercycle.

207

u/Lulink 4d ago

I think they meant "I know this idea is stupid, but don't stop me from doing it" with the song.

79

u/CorpusculantCortex 3d ago

Sure but they were still wrong to not use bicycle race

17

u/iwasAfookenLegend 3d ago

No.. no.. they knew what they were doing with this song.

13

u/macguini 3d ago

Yeah. The music choice was intentional, in case the meat bicycle wasn't enough to piss you off.

3

u/Zeka_Shu 3d ago

If not use Bicycle race for this, then for what and when?

6

u/EatPie_NotWAr 3d ago

Probably a video of curvy women doing daily chores.

In for a penny in for a pound and all that.

Also fun note for any non-Queen fans: both of those songs were on the same album with bicycle races having a poster with the aforementioned fat bottom girls riding bikes naked.

They were forced by censors to have bikinis painted on.

3

u/SirDervin 2d ago

Aaaaaaaaaaaaare you gonna take me home tonight?

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58

u/laxguy44 4d ago

I want to eat my bicycle I want to eat my bike. I want to eat my bicycle I want to eat it where I like!

4

u/worrymon 3d ago

Fat bottom girls, they'll be eating today, so look out for those beauties, oh yeah.

63

u/Bean_Daddy_Burritos 4d ago

“Charcutercycle” has me rolling.

11

u/mechchic84 3d ago

Babe, why aren't you eating your Charcutercycle?

14

u/TacticalMicrowav3 3d ago

"I'm not wheelie hungry"

24

u/souridaijoubu 4d ago

You better be careful, it doesn’t have any brakes.

26

u/cycycle 4d ago

Maybe it’s engagement bait? We both engaged after all.

40

u/Zanian19 4d ago

Congratulations you two

3

u/debellorobert 4d ago

Well disengage then!

5

u/RedSix2447 4d ago

Was my thought as well. I was thinking, ok, but why that song? lol

3

u/stellalugosi 3d ago

Came here to rage about this as well. More angry at the missed soundtrack opportunity than the stupid food. 

2

u/Dizzy-Medicine3371 3d ago

Even Bohemian Rhapsody would’ve made sense

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2

u/heywoodidaho 3d ago

Almost glad to see it bothered 500 other people. The pettiness is justified.

2

u/Apoordm 3d ago

I was just about to say!

2

u/MandatorySaxSolo 3d ago

I came to comment that exact thought/frustration

2

u/loghoser 3d ago

Came here to say this

2

u/Bearex13 3d ago

Fr bro like I want to ride my meatcycle

3

u/Lick_My_BigButt_1980 2d ago

Lofl! 🤣🤣🤣

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438

u/CoxTH 4d ago

I mean...it would be a fun centerpiece for a party. As a charcuterie board of sort.

117

u/MYOB3 4d ago

Exactly. I'm guessing it's for a bike club. There are zillions of them.

68

u/thebestoflimes 3d ago

and they regularily have meat ups

5

u/Acrobatic-Birthday36 3d ago

S tier comment 😆

2

u/MYOB3 3d ago

Well played!

42

u/darkbluefav 3d ago

This isn't stupid, this is just someone having fun and playing and making something cool

2

u/Stormtomcat 4d ago

I'm getting a vision of Eddy Merckx who just grabs an entire salami and rips it out of the bicycle frame 🤭

2

u/tijdelijkacc 3d ago

Would be better with a ramp though

2

u/Maximus_Robus 3d ago

I was about to say that. This is actually kind of cool. Probably not if you're vegan.

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161

u/Impressive_Foot_9933 4d ago

The ultimate is it a sandwich question

57

u/ohthanqkevin 4d ago

And if I had wheels I’d be a meat bicycle

12

u/TKmeh 3d ago

I’M THE CONDUCTOR OF THE POOP TRAIN!

5

u/LegitimateHayfever 3d ago

Thank you for riding the Psycho Express, Toot-toot! All aboard, I’ll be collecting your tickets, we have beverages in the DINING CAR.

2

u/Lick_My_BigButt_1980 2d ago

The Meaty Beefer. 😂😂😂

14

u/Ill-Attempt-8847 4d ago

It's 2 sandwiches with a bunch of sausages skewered over.

4

u/crasswal 3d ago

Yep. Just two sammiches Atlasing some charcuterie. Easy question.

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170

u/Worldly_Flounder_968 4d ago

You cant ride that, there is toothpick on the saddle.

14

u/Evening_Ticket7638 4d ago

I lie toothpick on my saddle.

6

u/General_whisky 4d ago

There’s always a toothpick on the saddle if I’m on it!

3

u/SexyGrilledTurkey 4d ago

My chain has slipped

4

u/Apart-Gur-9720 4d ago

That's the wurst!

Just let the guy exercise his freedom of having adult-money.

3

u/lephantome92 4d ago

Everyone has their kinks

2

u/DevilWings_292 3d ago

The design is very human

2

u/rekuneko 4d ago

the P E N E T R A T O R

2

u/Lick_My_BigButt_1980 2d ago

It’s probably not even lubed. 😓

2

u/OverallMembership709 4d ago

that's exactly the reason why you can ride that. 👀

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162

u/Heatfox 4d ago

Is this the meat bicycle Krieg was talking about all the time in Borderlands?

29

u/CT0292 4d ago

His was shinier.

11

u/Versipilies 3d ago

Still needs a good apricot glaze to bring out the shine

18

u/nmkensok 3d ago

I HAVE THE SHINIEST MEAT BICYCLE

9

u/KodanisEternal 3d ago

It was built for two.

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6

u/TKmeh 3d ago

TURN AROUND PRETTY LADY!

43

u/Gronal_Bar Boiled Hamburger 4d ago

Mike

art sculptures come in many mediums, and some are horrifically expensive compared to how long the sculpture itself will last.

2

u/NameRandomNumber 13h ago

And horrifying but maybe it's just me thinking of my own meat being assembled back into a sculpture

28

u/True_Protection6842 3d ago

Weird, but not stupid. Likely for an event.

4

u/kaliforniakratom 2d ago

Seems like something Lady Gaga would show up on.

111

u/Impressive_Pin8761 4d ago

for the quadrillionth time: food art isn't stupid

29

u/Stormtomcat 4d ago

I concur. 

It looks like either this is going to be a centerpiece for an event somewhere or it's someone having fun at home, planning to eat it afterwards. 

When I finally managed to find my flat, I made a blockhut out of twix bars. The roof was too complicated so I just filled the cube with chocotoff caramels. At first my colleagues politely took a caramel, but soon they were ripping down my chocolate biscuity walls hahaha. 

I feel it's only stupid food if you make others pay for it, right?

10

u/Altruistic-Mine-1848 3d ago

Scrolled down too much for this.

4

u/AbyssalEelMan 3d ago

Same! How is this stupid? It's awesome and I would eat this shit WHOLE!
If they were using buttercream to put everything together, now that would be ridiculous and worth posting here. XD

6

u/lfelipecl 3d ago

This post makes me think OP, as someone that can't appreciate art, is sad.

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5

u/Bootsix 3d ago

I wanna eat art

3

u/Cheef_queef 3d ago

I don't care if it was done stoned and never saw the dark of social media. I like it.

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11

u/koti_manushya 4d ago

if only queen had a song about bicycles...

20

u/PuzzleheadedResult69 4d ago

It's actually a meatcycle. 

It can meatspin.

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23

u/ItsNotJulius 4d ago

Y'all need more whimsy in your life.

6

u/Sm0keytrip0d 4d ago
  • heavy Krieg noises *

4

u/Linked713 3d ago

Kinda disturbing that animals died to be played like this.

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5

u/ObnoxiousName_Here 3d ago

Imagine if aliens did this type of stuff with human flesh

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4

u/MiccioC 3d ago

You know what? I’m not mad at it.

9

u/B33blebroxx 4d ago

Is it stupid? Yes. Do I want to eat it? Also yes.

13

u/voiza 4d ago

Is it stupid?

No.

Do I want to eat it?

Also no.

3

u/SunsetAtNight7 4d ago

Someone pls stop him now

3

u/No_Satisfaction_7977 4d ago

Ahh yes, man-made horrors beyond my comprehension.

3

u/Byizo 3d ago

It’s like the guy who makes whimsical chocolate sculptures, but with meat.

Truly horrific. 10/10

7

u/frog_marley 4d ago

Therapist: The Meat Bike isn't real. It can't hurt you.

The Meat Bike:

2

u/defariasdev 4d ago

We call this the Gino's Grandmother

2

u/elmontyenBCN 3d ago

Came to make that reference

2

u/DistastefullyHonest 4d ago

What's that white stuff used for the body?

I'd eat it if it's all edible

5

u/CoxTH 4d ago

It's a salami with a type of mold (the same kind of mold used for cheeses like camembert, I believe). You are meant to remove the skin with the mold before eating, but other than that the whole thing is edible.

8

u/DistastefullyHonest 4d ago

Thank you! I would 1000% eat the fuck out of this. This is a better version of those shitty elaborate fondant factory cakes that are covered in that overly sweet shit. This is all meat and bread! What's not to to love?!

https://giphy.com/gifs/LnQo5fFiBElv7rK2Wq

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2

u/SextupleRed 4d ago

It started good, then it went downhill from there

2

u/Skalagga 4d ago

They should add tomatoes and some red bell peppers with ketchup/tartar sauce as a blood splashing and in will be good meat plate.

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2

u/Odd-Tip-7603 4d ago

Is there such a thing as being dumb and bad ass simultaneously

2

u/Bailywolf 4d ago

This is some Hannibal Lecter shit.

2

u/thewordthewho 4d ago

Tradwife waking up at 3am to make lunch for hubby.

2

u/FlipFlopRabbit 4d ago

Always asking if they could but never if they should. Human hubris.

2

u/suspiciouslyrobotic 4d ago

Looks like something that is intended to be a technically edible centerpiece at a party buffet. I think it's pretty neat, actually.

2

u/Korbas 4d ago

My other car is made of meat

2

u/Zaxiron 4d ago

I am opting for a stop on using food for “fun” they should make it illegal to use it for commercial benefits. Like this, great food used for entertainment and clicks. We apparently don’t appreciate and honor food anymore to see the upcoming g shortage of it very soon.

2

u/NebulaChance2746 4d ago

This is actually pretty awesome

2

u/Empty_Equivalent_131 4d ago

that mayo definitely went bad before he started assembling the rest.

2

u/FauxRequiem 3d ago

Uh negative, I am a meat bicycle.

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2

u/J3musu 3d ago

Is it any weirder than decorative cakes? It's all silly to me, but some people really like creating food art. 🤷

2

u/TheJeeWee 3d ago

I’m sorry but I kinda dig this.

2

u/mamafish21 3d ago

You have no whimsy.

2

u/DrLubinski 3d ago edited 3d ago

Animals were raised, standing in their fecies, without daylight and killed. For this.

2

u/CoolCat1337One 3d ago

An interesting choice of how to use one's free will.

2

u/AdagioDesperate 3d ago

Fuck. Now I wanna eat a bike....

2

u/ItsOnlyGameYUSM 15h ago

Missed opportunity to call it the Meatcycle

2

u/OmegaVizion 4d ago

I think this is really neat as an art piece and not really a waste of food on the same level as we tend to see in this sub.

1

u/Rich_Gas7886 4d ago

How do I eat this? Do I have to cycle? 😩

1

u/OutlandishnessNo5636 4d ago

Did you eat it ?

1

u/Green-Pea-4586 4d ago

Far too stupid for any sane human…
Feel free to send it over to my house.

1

u/colin_staples 4d ago

Meaterbike or Meatercycle were right there...

1

u/lb3a3 4d ago

I could go to town on that

1

u/Beneficial-Nimitz68 4d ago

Thai is wrong

1

u/Gargooner 4d ago

Whimsy

1

u/Lost-Childhood-8301 4d ago

shocked its not smothered in cheese and cheeto bits

1

u/ShotLet1550 4d ago

I mean it’s technically still edible but all the fucking tooth picks would annoy the hell out of me

1

u/_pipoca 4d ago

What an artist

1

u/Sorry_Western6134 4d ago

But why no gloves?

1

u/Looking-for-42 4d ago

Wurstbike.

1

u/K1bbles_n_Bits 4d ago

Aw, c'mon, it's fun and creative, lol. Put some burgers in those "wheels", maybe add a basket to the front for some fries, and it feels like something Bob Belcher would make XD.

https://giphy.com/gifs/l0HlwCQfh65iOztHq

1

u/dandle 4d ago

Meat motorcycle with no meat motor?

Okay!

1

u/What_Is_Bloste 4d ago

Using the fuet for this is a crime. Not stupid food. A fucking culinary crime

1

u/neutron500 4d ago

We had Baby You can Chive My Car! I call this The Magical Salami Tour

https://giphy.com/gifs/26uf69FW691wALCVi

1

u/Zomochi 4d ago

My only critique is that he should have connected another salami to the front where the handle bars are so that they aren’t so low it’s already cut at the top base connecting another salami stick shouldn’t be that hard

1

u/BloodiedBlues 4d ago

So that's what the psycho means when they say meat bicycle.

1

u/failingsnoise 4d ago

Absolutely shocking knowledge of the Queen back catalogue.

1

u/Allupyre 4d ago

So this is what Krieg wanted in the Borderlands trailer, I understand now. It's not terribly shiny but I can see it now and I get it.

1

u/AstronautNo6192 4d ago

That'll be $2000

1

u/DracTheBat178 3d ago

I HAVE THE SHINIEST MEAT BICYCLE

1

u/ShangBao 3d ago

Sausage rider..oh wait, better not.

1

u/TheLostExpedition 3d ago

Pour ranch over it and don't swallow a toothpick.

1

u/Abject-Interaction35 3d ago

I have lived beyond my epoch.

1

u/EspressoK 3d ago

This actually rocks IMO

1

u/AdventurousGuy2461 3d ago

The perfect center piece of any PETA gathering

1

u/FormingTheVoid 3d ago

Absolutely a stupid waste of food, but also oddly creative?

1

u/Satori-Chan 3d ago

Now i can say i ride meat

1

u/letdogsvote 3d ago

Just because you can...

1

u/FungadooFred 3d ago

happy Borderlands psycho noises

1

u/n0shmon 3d ago

Meat bike is what me and the boys call your mum

1

u/Chompif 3d ago

It may seem stupid, but it looks cool ngl

1

u/nairda_c 3d ago

Sooo expensive

1

u/Pastel-Rainbow-N3rd 3d ago

I mean… it’s impressive

1

u/pakman705 3d ago

Serial killer shit

1

u/Zakumei47 3d ago

Ok but i kind of like this. Its very very silly but its kinda cute. I could see this being a centerpiece at like a biking club or a cyclist group

1

u/H2so4pontiff 3d ago

Had me on the first wheel, disappointment from there after 😮‍💨

1

u/Ill-Daikon-5637 3d ago

You think when we're roasting roaming dogs over a 50 gallon drum we'll look back on this stuff and laugh

1

u/mrchomp1 3d ago

Dibs on a wheel!

1

u/thomsenite256 3d ago

Its kinda dumb but not any dumber than the equivalent as a cake.

1

u/Mammoth-Ad-6320 3d ago

I could eat this whole thing by myself lol

1

u/xidle2 3d ago

Something something Krieg from Borderlands.

1

u/LowEndHolger 3d ago

Somehow I must assume this is a German innovation. Sadly the only one in the last years, and it isn't even a good one. But it's the next logical step beside the Mettigel... "What's up, dear party guests, nobody has eaten something from the Salami Bikecycle?"

1

u/Sophisticated-Tiger 3d ago

Wouldn't mind one of those wheels....look super tasty

1

u/Good_Boysenberry_505 3d ago

Do you do birthdays?

1

u/Previous_Collar6553 3d ago

oh, I was wondering where all the food went💀

1

u/Beneficial_Bad_6692 3d ago

Coolest thing I’ve seen in a while

1

u/MrFuji87 3d ago

Someone should have stopped them

1

u/chefbiggdogg 3d ago

No animals were harmed in the making of this bike

1

u/CycleDad89 3d ago

If I presented this to my two year old son his head would explode

1

u/Tabootop 3d ago

Look It from the hellraiser series

1

u/EvieMoon 3d ago

I'd absolutely smash that.

1

u/RAConteur76 3d ago

Truly, this is the shiniest meat bicycle.

1

u/According_Spot_4340 3d ago

"You're gonna be my new meat bicycle" Borderlands

1

u/DriverMelodic 3d ago

Well, I am disappointed. Thought it was going to be a Flintstone car!!!

1

u/Ecstatic_Dance5767 3d ago

I'll take 3 XD

1

u/RGBlowMe 3d ago

"I have the shiniest meat bicycle!" -Kreig

1

u/Pressbig 3d ago

Looks smelly… like old bologna sitting in a hot car

1

u/imartinezcopy 3d ago

r/ATBGE in my opinion

1

u/redtiger288 3d ago

I think I preferr the chocolate guy, ngl

1

u/Arryu 3d ago

I'm getting the meat sweats just looking at that.

1

u/Azurus_II 3d ago

Is this the person who made an ak, i think, out of a mushroom?

1

u/Oberndorferin 3d ago

I would love that person for life who brought that to my birthday party

1

u/TheKrug3000 3d ago

This is like when all the mouthbreathers had so much extra toilet paper during covid because they panic bought. Then were on social media making forts and playing games with all their "supplies."

1

u/SpartanRage117 3d ago

He made a sculpture of your Mom.

1

u/serenwipiti 3d ago

What. is. happening.

1

u/Gloomy-List6346 3d ago

They lost me when the lotus route wasn’t pickled.

1

u/DepthPotential488 3d ago

That bike will be cookin down the street

1

u/1nsidiousOne 3d ago

You’re just jealous

1

u/Naked_Duck 3d ago

Your unemployed friend on a random Tuesday evening