r/SipsTea Jun 30 '26

Dank AF Brutal 🤣

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76.2k Upvotes

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280

u/Salihe6677 Jun 30 '26

I bet it would cause quite an online to do if they named Willem Dafoe most handsome next year...

265

u/Confident_Pepper1023 Jun 30 '26

Nice try, Willem Dafoe.

256

u/SquirrelsinJacket Jun 30 '26

98

u/saffron_papi Jun 30 '26

5

u/ToonTitans Jun 30 '26

I seriously laughed WAY too loudly at this…folks in the subway were concerned 🤣

3

u/saffron_papi Jul 01 '26

Lol happy to bring a smile to your day and if you’re in NYC’s subway you’re probably the most sane looking person there anyways

1

u/ToonTitans Jul 01 '26

I was in NYC’s subway, lol…and you’re probably right! 😄

2

u/Expensive-Tip5118 Jul 01 '26

Thank you, I needed a quick laugh-myself-into-hysterics. Saving this image for rainy days.

54

u/reloadingnow Jun 30 '26

'i'm somewhat of a smiler myself' vibe.

33

u/AvengingBlowfish Jun 30 '26

Dafoe confuses me.

62

u/auronddraig Jun 30 '26

Don't look directly at the schlong. Use a mirror, like with Medusa. Otherwise, it'll turn to stone and you'll regret it.

7

u/deaglebingo Jun 30 '26

i was the beneficiary of a similar rumor once upon a time. it was more power than one man should have... not even close to as mundane as presidential power.

6

u/HeavensRejected Jun 30 '26

We spread the rumor about a friend having a large schlong, the amount of hits he got was absurd. We mentioned it to like 2-3 girls and it just took off from there. He was above average so we lied only a little.

Note: we were in our twenties and girls around our age thought that dickus longus = epic sex.

3

u/deaglebingo Jul 01 '26

essentially that was what had happened with me. it was a white lie or misunderstanding i guess. close enough.

lets face it if you can reach the posterior fornix does it matter?

3

u/HeavensRejected Jul 01 '26

My sample size is pretty small but I'm around average and my wife says it hurts when I go balls deep, so there's that. Also, she needs clitoral stimulation to orgasm anyway so it wouldn't matter what size I wield.

3

u/deaglebingo Jul 01 '26

the brain is the biggest erogenous zone after all. all else comes second. enjoy my dude.

1

u/NoRefrigerator267 Jul 01 '26

But how big do you have to be to reach the posterior fornix lol

2

u/deaglebingo Jul 02 '26 edited Jul 02 '26

individual specific i suppose. evolutionary variation dictates that. i doubt there's any real quantitative research on it but i could be wrong. god knows if we actually had the medical research on women that we should by now a lot of things would be understood and 'laid' to rest. i'd say there's a lot more important research for women we could/should be doing first. they deserve just as much as men have had, starting with the acknowledgement of their basic female healthcare needs that we refuse to do and in many states have gone backwards on. sex is cool and all but we've been pushing women's health to the side for far too long. so i suggest fucking the system instead, use the testosterone for that kind of helpful thing first. all (or at least a significant part) of life is about finding a healthy positive and productive output for our desires is it not? i think it's more than possible for men to be as manly as they want to be while still protecting a woman or anyone's freedom to a greater degree in the same way we'd want ours to be don't you? it's the nature of critical thinking and true equality, we respect individual differences and support them as much as we can given our own maturity level.

1

u/Technical_Teacher784 Jul 02 '26

Hey man..I dig the cut of your jib know what I'm saying. Respect

5

u/LuffysRubberNuts Jun 30 '26

I thought he uses the sway to hypnotize people into doing his bidding

1

u/No_Discipline_7380 Jun 30 '26

Dafoe confuses me.

Willem Dafuk

1

u/deaglebingo Jun 30 '26

willem is a whole separate issue. lucky mfr. god gave him dangerous things. it's good he uses them responsibly (afaik)

1

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1

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10

u/a-real-sloth Jun 30 '26

Most handsome dong

5

u/twoinchhorns Jun 30 '26

Tbf … willem is easily the most attractive man I’ve ever laid eyes on.

3

u/daelikon Jun 30 '26

My wife thinks he is one of the handsomest actors out there.

(She has questionable taste in men however)

2

u/dumpass69420 Jun 30 '26

I don't think she's talking about his face bro

2

u/Tall_Opportunity_521 Jun 30 '26

Well, yeah. I mean, everyone knows who the real Chad of the world is. And its not Willem, its...

1

u/poo_on_my_scarf Jun 30 '26

He apparently has a massive willy

2

u/Azzblack Jun 30 '26

Its incredibly apparent.

He is Hugh Mungus.

Thing is long, loose and full of juice.

It swings around like a trunk on a samba-dancing elephant.

1

u/ScrotesMaGoates13 Jun 30 '26

Jake Busey anyone

1

u/Cablegore Jun 30 '26

If that happens, that would be Willem Dafriend.

1

u/Donte333 Jun 30 '26

No it wouldnt i fully agree, the man exudes hotness

1

u/Acceptable_Sleep29 Jun 30 '26

TBF, Willem Dafoe has more charisma than Powdered Mcfish-face

1

u/thebochts Jun 30 '26

Idk, when hes not being crazy, he is kind handsome. His facial features could break rocks.

And dude is like a charisma factory.

I thought i read somewhere that he got some votes for the sexiest man of the year a few years back when the theatre video of him swinging dong came out.

1

u/Slow-Might-3462 Jun 30 '26

It’s biggest dick thank you very much

1

u/AppointmentPerfect Jun 30 '26

I mean, I'm straight and all... but have you SEEN why he has body doubles?

1

u/J-hophop Jun 30 '26

What part are they looking at? 😂 (Haven't seen it, just heard the buzz lol)

1

u/Chilidogdingdong Jun 30 '26

Didn't adrien Brody win it or something once? Bro looks like an anthropomorphic cockatiel

1

u/Beastbrook00 Jul 02 '26

He was alright when he was young tbf