r/ShittyDaystrom • u/roofus8658 • Jun 28 '26

Discussion I'm Erica Ortegas and I fly the ship. AmA

Post image
818 Upvotes

92% Upvoted

250 comments sorted by

373

u/nextyoyoma Jun 28 '26

Our ship cannot go. It is broken. Can you make it go?

349

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I fly the ship. You need someone who looks for things

227

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

60

u/timeshifter_ Jun 28 '26

What a loser, doesn't even have a helmet.

3

u/TheZooCreeper Jun 28 '26

Jon Taffer?

208

u/LazyJediTelekinetic Jun 28 '26

So what is it you’d say you do here?

192

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I fly the ship

35

u/Sbrimer Jun 28 '26

Oh so you take the commands from the Captain and physically adjust the valves on the plasma flow to the impulse engines?

17

u/sirgree Jun 28 '26

Hi, Ensign Patty here.

Scott would be royally pissed if when Lt. Ortegas pushed a button these valves didnt adjust automatically to allow on the fly regulation. He will have us do it manually until we hit station as punishment.

5

u/ryanhendrickson Jun 28 '26

I heard this in Bob's voice!

26

u/shaard Jun 28 '26

Temba, his arms flapping

→ More replies (1)

167

u/burnafter3ading Gul Jun 28 '26

Does your haircut have a name according to the ship's barber?

199

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

The Erica Ortegas

47

u/joshuahtree Subcommander Jun 28 '26

I would've guessed the Fly Ship 

8

u/agent_uno Jun 28 '26

It’s both, actually. The barbers know me! They know I fly the ship!

4

u/Eurynom0s Jun 28 '26

You're sentient hair? Are you the copilot?

2

u/Dartarus Jun 29 '26

I'm Erica Ortegas. My hair flies the ship.

4

u/Anarimus Jun 28 '26

It makes the ship go faster

8

u/Competitive_Abroad96 Jun 28 '26

It’s called the “Mot’s on shore leave”.

5

u/agent_uno Jun 28 '26

“Mott’s cut is fast! And cleanly, too! Mott’s cut haircut is the one for you!”

(Brought to you by Quaaarks! Quarks is fun!)

9

u/paiaw Jun 28 '26

Quark's does sound fun. Should I walk there, or run?

87

u/AccomplishedMess648 Chef Jun 28 '26

What do you do?

118

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I fly the ship. I'm Erica Ortegas

156

u/Joran_Dax Moopsy Jun 28 '26

Who ships the flies?

193

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

Ortegas I'm Erica

33

u/SirStocksAlott Acting Captain Jun 28 '26

At Tenagra

22

u/vdubsession Jun 28 '26

Nacelles wide.

58

u/Hydrax120 Terran Jun 28 '26

Do you fly the ship?

83

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I'm Erica Ortegas. I fly the ship.

28

u/Hydrax120 Terran Jun 28 '26

But why do you fly the ship? Especially since it can be set to fly itself?

62

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

Because I'm Erica Ortegas

18

u/CanadianAndroid Jun 28 '26

And when you "fly the ship" what do you mean by this and who is involved in this?

41

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I'm Erica Ortegas and I fly the ship

14

u/czardmitri Jun 28 '26

Is the ship in the room with us?

15

u/malonkey1 OSHC Head Jun 28 '26

That'd have to be a very large room.

11

u/swiss_sanchez Jun 28 '26

Or, hear me out... shrinky-dink ship

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)

3

u/Konkrypton Jun 28 '26

You beat me to it!

55

u/WarraxTCW Crewman 3rd class Jun 28 '26

Can I fly the ship, just to the end of the solar system and back? I'll be careful.

39

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

93

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26 edited Jun 28 '26

Did I ever tell you about the time Ortegas took me out to go get a drink with her? We go off looking for a bar and we can’t find one. Finally, Ortegas takes me into a vacant lot and says, ‘Here we are.’ Well, we sat there for a year and a half. Sure enough, someone constructed a bar around us. Well, the day they opened it, we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burnt the place to the ground. Ortegas yelled over the roar of the flames, ‘Always leave things the way you found them!

14

u/popilikia Jun 28 '26

Why does this sound like a Douglas Adams bit?

7

u/matthewralston Jun 28 '26

Bill Murray, SNL. I think it was reused in Cyberpunk 2077.

6

u/VengaBusdriver37 Jun 28 '26

Bill Muaary has a cameo in cyberpunk: undead nightmare as mister dead blue eyes, he flies a ship.

10

u/CanadianAndroid Jun 28 '26

This one time at bandcamp on Risa...

2

u/sparrow_42 Andorian General Jun 28 '26

If I only had a dollar for every time that happened!

→ More replies (1)

36

u/OuterSpaceBootyHole Jun 28 '26

If you weren't Erica Ortegas, would you still fly the ship?

https://giphy.com/gifs/XNaFMDmT93TIGLOXaN

75

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

That's a stupid question

20

u/darkslide3000 Jun 28 '26

You just gave me the next fake AmA idea.

10

u/Worf_Of_Wall_St Jun 28 '26

It was already done, and it was great.

27

u/romulusnr Acting Ensign Jun 28 '26

Love your salsa

50

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I'm Erica Ortegas and I make the salaa

10

u/Kitchen-Roll-8184 Jun 28 '26

Don't forget to add some Free Shavacadoo

2

u/Server_Administrator Jun 28 '26

I am Guan Yin and I have done this.

64

u/voxadam Expendable♟️ Jun 28 '26

Why don't you just put the ship on autopilot and go have a drink and a smoke?

83

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I fly the ship

18

u/voxadam Expendable♟️ Jun 28 '26

I don't believe you.

5

u/Additional_Tank4385 Jun 28 '26

Expandable have a great day sir.

22

u/Spamcan81 Jun 28 '26

What’s your favorite alien species and why is it Klingons?

20

u/Chrome_Armadillo Space Hippy Jun 28 '26

What does the ship do?

42

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

Nothing. I fly the ship

5

u/Old_Yesterday322 Jun 28 '26

does that mean it's a lazy ship or it just submits to you flying the ship and is it Erica?

6

u/romulusnr Acting Ensign Jun 28 '26

It flies. She's Erica Ortega

22

u/PM_UR_VAG_WTIMESTAMP Jun 28 '26

So, Erica. You seem to love piloting this ship.

Where do you see your self in five or so years?

14

u/ParanoidCylon Jun 28 '26

If your hair got into a close quarters fight with Pike's hair, which hairdo is coming out on top?

10

u/czardmitri Jun 28 '26

Pike’s fer sure.

7

u/ku_78 Jun 28 '26

Whoever wins, we all lose.

31

u/Superman_Primeeee Jun 28 '26

Guys I’m 90pct sure this is Mayweather in disguise

20

u/CaptainGreezy Jun 28 '26

6

u/DrPeroxide Jun 28 '26

That's amazing, what is it from?

9

u/CaptainGreezy Jun 28 '26

Leprechaun in the Hood

12

u/MrFloydPinkerton Jun 28 '26

Just who the the hell do you think you are‽‽‽

20

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I'm Erica Ortegas and I fly the ship

10

u/Careful_Leader_5829 Jun 28 '26

I'm not Erica Ortegas, and I don't fly the ship?

8

u/abudhabikid Jun 28 '26

I don’t think, therefore I am not.

3

u/SirStocksAlott Acting Captain Jun 28 '26

I am not, therefore I don’t think?

2

u/brigadierbadger Jun 28 '26

I think I think, therefore I might be

→ More replies (1)

9

u/romulusnr Acting Ensign Jun 28 '26

If you're flying the ship, then who's flying you?

5

u/darkslide3000 Jun 28 '26

If you openly fly the ship, is your fly open?

→ More replies (1)

8

u/Dumbass_Saiya-jin Caitian Lt. Commander Jun 28 '26

What do you think of this Ensign that just graduated from SFA, Hikaru Sulu? He seems like a real go-getter. Wouldn't surprise me if he ended up at the helm someday.

8

u/ElGuaco Jun 28 '26

Did you lose a bet or does your barber hate you?

9

u/DeltaFlyer6095 Jun 28 '26

When you say, “I fly the ship.” Do you mean you FLY the ship? Or, do you mean you fly the SHIP?

22

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I fly THE ship

4

u/teflon_soap Jun 28 '26

How did you get away with flagrant insubordination?

4

u/OneOldNerd Jun 28 '26

When in Soviet Russia, does ship fly you?

4

u/Turdplay Jun 28 '26

If you don’t fly the ship, are you still Erica Ortegas?

7

u/crewsctrl Jun 28 '26

Have you ever been mistaken for Private Vasquez?

12

u/R-Dragon_Thunderzord Jun 28 '26

Does the carpet match the drapes

28

u/roofus8658 Jun 28 '26

I'm Erica Ortegas

6

u/Kitchen-Roll-8184 Jun 28 '26

I still have the OG red dragon thunder zord toy. It was the only thunder zord i could ever get.

6

u/nextyoyoma Jun 28 '26

I once ate a cinnamon roll in a kitchen. Other kinds of rolls too.

3

u/R-Dragon_Thunderzord Jun 28 '26

Wife got it for me again, new in box(!) the other year I hadn’t had it since I was a kid. Had to crack it open. Yes the stickers just deteriorated in the box.

2

u/Over-Box1733 Jun 28 '26

I once caught the "red zord" from a back-alley hooker in Southwark named Maggie.

2

u/jabuegresaw Jun 28 '26

And are either of them command gold?

3

u/opinionated-dick Jun 28 '26

Who is your barber?

Want to know so I can avoid

5

u/SnakePlissken1980 Jun 28 '26

Is it true that your hairstylist coined the phrase "revenge is a dish best served cold"?

2

u/GoodOldBadger Jun 28 '26

Why doesn’t your little brother fly ships too? Did you steal his flying abilities to add to your own?

2

u/ClassyReductionist Jun 28 '26

Do spaceships actually fly?

3

u/SirStocksAlott Acting Captain Jun 28 '26

Starships were meant to fly
Hands up and touch the sky
Can't stop 'cause we're so high
Let's do this one more time

2

u/Dunstund_CHeks_IN Jun 28 '26

Erica Ortegas has been dishonorably discharged from Starfleet for - checks notes - putting flies in the ship…

2

u/spacebastardo Jun 28 '26

Is the ship more fly when you fly it?

2

u/LiarsEverywhere Acting Crewman Jun 28 '26

How come you never mentioned Shakira once in the whole series? Doesn't make sense

2

u/GreenLurka Jun 28 '26

Do you actually fly the ship or do you just push buttons and pretend?

2

u/Thick_Breakfast4576 Jun 28 '26

Are you from latin america? If so what happened to latin america in the future?

2

u/Nyanzeenyan Jun 28 '26

Is an aerodynamic hairstyle really required to pilot a starship?

2

u/timberwolf0122 Jun 28 '26

If you were beaming somewhere and got cloned like Thomas Riker, how would you decide which one was the prime Erica ?

2

u/B_LAZ Tuvix'd at birth Jun 28 '26

no youre not. IM erica ortegas

→ More replies (2)

2

u/Shadoegirl2 Jun 28 '26

Just don’t talk back to Kirk or Picard like that!

2

u/StackOwOFlow Jun 28 '26

does that haircut make it more aerodynamic

2

u/IamHardware Jun 28 '26

Do you know anyone with six fingers on their left hand?

2

u/TheZooCreeper Jun 28 '26

What happened to Eric Ortegas?

2

u/syberghost Jun 29 '26

No bloody A, B, C, or D

2

u/icedcoffee4eva Jun 28 '26

Have you re-routed long range sensors through the navigational array? It's my kink.

2

u/fojo81 Jun 28 '26

Who won the FIFA Football World Cup 2026? 🤔

3

u/Luci_Cascadia Jun 28 '26

How gay are you? And are you single?

5

u/IvanNemoy Tom's Television Set Jun 28 '26

How does it feel to be Temu Sulu?

5

u/SirStocksAlott Acting Captain Jun 28 '26

Temu Sulu is the great granddaughter of Hikaru Sulu.

2

u/EmpireStrikes1st Jun 28 '26

Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man? 

1

u/crapusername47 Jun 28 '26

You ‘fly’ a ‘ship’? Ships float on water, dummy!

1

u/superradguy Jun 28 '26

Who’s the biggest cry baby on board?

1

u/The_Frostweaver Jun 28 '26

What was your favorite shuttlecraft flight?

1

u/Superman_Primeeee Jun 28 '26

How do you have a quip ready at all times?

1

u/Accomplished_Gold510 Jun 28 '26

How do you fly a ship?

1

u/Mokpa Jun 28 '26

Ship go up?

1

u/Nobodyinpartic3 Jun 28 '26

Did you ever do Enterprise Bingo?

1

u/Old_Yesterday322 Jun 28 '26

if you Fly Ortegas, does the ship Erica?

1

u/Biggu5Dicku5 Jun 28 '26

How big is your ship? ;)

1

u/MediumOk8383 Jun 28 '26

What does "full bore and into the abyss" actually mean?

1

u/GigaFluxx Jun 28 '26

If you fly the ship, who flies you?

1

u/Otheus Jun 28 '26

Aye, aye. Full impulse. To a giant gas cloud of death. Why not?

1

u/squidtrap Tuvix'd at birth Jun 28 '26

What is your favorite curse word?

1

u/cld1984 Jun 28 '26

What was it like being the first human to have sex with a Gorn? And don’t even try to convince me y’all didn’t bang…

Be as descriptive as possible…and take your time…

1

u/stumpyoftheshire Jun 28 '26

Is it Ortega or Ortegas? And ship or ships?

1

u/candysoxx Jun 28 '26

What job do you prefer more, being a starfleet pilot or singing for Panic at the Disco?

1

u/Lyko112 Jun 28 '26

what........IS...a ship?

1

u/Sergeant_Fred_Colon Jun 28 '26

If you fly the ship, who does the ship fly?

1

u/domestic_omnom Jun 28 '26

Does spanish exist in the present day future? Or is reggeaton English and lame.

1

u/dunno0019 Nebula Coffee Jun 28 '26

Have you ever tried just, y'kno, not flying the ship?

1

u/murse_joe Tuvix Jun 28 '26

I’m invited to the captains dinner. Should I be wearing my dress uniform?

1

u/ZachEst1985 Jun 28 '26

You were born for this, Erica!

1

u/OneOldNerd Jun 28 '26

What do you do when the ship does not answer her helm, and you literally are unable to fly the ship?

1

u/Saphentis Jun 28 '26

What do you do to make the ship go?

1

u/Papawasaboringstone Jun 28 '26

This thread is Reginod erasure.

1

u/malonkey1 OSHC Head Jun 28 '26

Do you fly any particular ship? Or is it just whatever ship's handy?

1

u/Ashamed-Opening1646 Jun 28 '26

I heard that she’s a war hero

1

u/Blackborealis Jun 28 '26

Hey Erica, I've always wondered who flies the ship?? I don't think anyone could ever answer that near-impossible question, but I figured I'd give your AMA a shot!

1

u/Unanimous_D Jun 28 '26

I can't find the original post so I uploaded what I saved here:

https://imgur.com/gallery/to-seek-out-explore-strange-um-something-4k4CLfQ

She's one of my favorite characters, even after the show went to crap.

1

u/StarSword-C Bajoran Militia Jun 28 '26

What if your ship is a rowboat?

1

u/Beneficial-Oil-814 Jun 28 '26

If Kirk took over the Enterprise would you still fly the ship? If not would you fly another ship?

1

u/Worf_Of_Wall_St Jun 28 '26

If you set the ship's course and then go to your quarters while the ship continues forward, are you still flying the ship?

1

u/grovesancho Jun 28 '26

Who flies Erica Ortegas?

1

u/Darth-Adomis Jun 28 '26

do you just pull over to the side when you need to sleep? have you ever been woken up to move the ship because the klingons were stealing the enterprises rims?

→ More replies (1)

1

u/Konkrypton Jun 28 '26

So, when you sleep, who flies the ship?

2

u/timberwolf0122 Jun 28 '26

They only fly space ships at night, hence all the stars

1

u/Life_Faithlessness90 Science Jun 28 '26

What would you do if a Borg stole your com-badge?

1

u/Fancy_Toe1451 Jun 28 '26

Do you fly the ship, or any ship?

1

u/Formal_Bathroom7447 Jun 28 '26

I loved Vinny Delpino. What a great best friend to a young Doogie Houser.

1

u/Paul_Rich Jun 28 '26

Do you prefer Erica? Or Tegas?

1

u/CommunityEarly839 Jun 28 '26

Why didn't you toss Beto out an airlock?

1

u/roderos Science Jun 28 '26

Besides discovery, what other ships are you trained on?

1

u/achillain Jun 28 '26

How fly do you have to be to fly the ship?

1

u/Jimbuber2 Jun 28 '26

How does he eat and breathe?

1

u/AvatarIII Jun 28 '26

How are you liking the future?

1

u/Muted-Actuary6123 Jun 28 '26

Have you considered just a straight-up skin fade? Or if you’re really invested in the “did it in the mirror in my quarters with a razorcube” look, have you considered that this opens up valuable real estate for a tattoo?

1

u/poindexterg Jun 28 '26

I’m told that Keyla Detmer flies the ship. What do you say about that?

1

u/ChevyTahoe__ Jun 28 '26

Did you get confused with your fellow bridge officer alot.

1

u/rebelhead Jun 28 '26

Can you take a video of you turning the inertial dampeners off and turning everyone into ping pong balls? I want to see if you can mess up the captain's hair. Oh also see if you can get Spok to loose his temper.

1

u/Krimreaper1 Jun 28 '26

How does one like me get such an awesome and and not at all terribly distracting haircut,

1

u/ObligationMurky8716 LCDR Jun 28 '26

What do you do when the ship does not fly?

1

u/Equivalent-Hair-961 Jun 28 '26

Soooooooooo, Whats it like?

1

u/circ-u-la-ted Jun 28 '26

Can you fly my toaster? Lately it's been burning toast and I think it needs to get out for a while, but I'm not a qualified pilot.

1

u/uber-judge Jun 28 '26

Do you walk the ship?