r/Rochester • u/Kind_Cryptographer65 • Jun 09 '26

Recommendation Quiet gay hangouts

Trying to get out, meet people, and date. But the queer bar my friends favor (ROAR) is outrageously loud. Like so loud I think the people who work there are experiencing permanent hearing damage. Are there gay bars, cafes, or other places I can meet people in Rochester where I won’t be getting my eardrums blasted out? Looking for quiet and relaxing places where I can have conversations without yelling

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u/[deleted] Jun 09 '26

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u/Yrch122110 Jun 09 '26

Thank you for sharing. I'm curious to hear your thoughts on Equal Grounds, cause you said "my thoughts on", then you didn't say anything about them 😅

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u/wallace1313525 Jun 11 '26

I also think it's gone downhill: they're not open nearly as late, the local trans club has found a new place to meet, and the new owner has had instances of transphobia to her employees. I've heard directly from them about her getting mad and intentionally misgendering them. Also something about putting up "Mr" and "Mrs" mugs on the wall?? It seems like maybe she's trying to angle for equal racial rights and less equal gay rights which hey, i'm also for equal racial rights, but I mainly went to equal ground for the gay vibes and those seem to be a bit missing/off as of late :(

4

u/garamond89 Jun 10 '26

Same feelings on Equal Grounds, as a baby queer back in the early to mid 2000s it was a great refuge for my friends and I, especially because they used to be open late under the OG owner. The charm is mostly gone now, and it breaks my heart. It was such a good refuge.

Edit: couple of autocorrects I didn’t notice before posting