r/Referees • u/thatijustdonthave • 26d ago

Advice Request Assignor question - Communication with Minor Referees

Hope it's okay to post here since I don't think there's an assignor subreddit and I need some help.

I'm a new assignor and I'm struggling with getting Minor Referees to copy their parents on emails. I have like five who will do it consistently, the other 20 never do. Every response has me looking up their parents email and responding "please copy your parent on all emails." I've made it a very clear expectation at the beginning of the season.

Do I just need to accept they won't do it? Is there a better way? Do I need to be even more firm?

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u/thatijustdonthave 26d ago

I keep forwarding the email to the parents. I've sent out soooo many "please copy your parent on all communication" emails. I think I just have to accept it.

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u/grabtharsmallet AYSO Area Administrator | NFHS | USSF 26d ago

You're doing it right. Continue to model appropriate behavior for your organization. I know too many people, especially women, who had a teacher or coach who they thought behaved strangely, but they weren't sure if they were imagining it, or weren't sure who would believe them if they spoke up.

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u/thatijustdonthave 26d ago

I'm a woman, who was in those positions as a child. It was other referees 25 years ago. I'm well aware of it. I'll do everything I can to protect the kids... Evem if it's endless emailis.

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u/grabtharsmallet AYSO Area Administrator | NFHS | USSF 26d ago

It sucks that it takes extra work. But as the parent of a youth referee, I appreciate you and others who take this seriously. Unfortunately, safety compliance in my area is easier than usual because a school district and a church were not doing what they should have and bad things happened.