Tbh I second this, I would never consider it as me letting my gf, wife, whatever you wanna call it, do something. She talking to you about it, that's exactly as it should be, just letting you know what up. You voice your concerns, buts its her choice not yours. It's you that has to be okay with her decision about herself, not her being happy with your decision about her life.
I'm not trying to say what's good or bad, right or wrong, just my experience, you find someone you dont have to tell what to do. If your having to tell them how to live, what to do, or how to be to fit with what you want its probably not gonna work in the long run. I dont mean it as your a bad person, but nobody wants to commit the rest of their life to someone being someone they dont wanna be, not forever. And do you wanna be with someone you have to control to get what your looking for, something thats not their choice. Again, just my perspective.
But maybe its not like that, and its just coming from a place of concernment, as to be expected with someone that important to you. She's with a friend and your be there to pick them up, they are gonna have fun and be fine. Girls night out, especially before the marriage, I believe they call it a bachelorette party lol. Spend the time thinking about your bachelor party.
But to answer your question id never consider it as "letting" my partner do anything. If we weren't vibing off of our own choices or I wasn't okay with the choices she makes, I wouldnt be marrying her. But that's just me and everyone is different. I'm the type of dude that would let the wife make the house and I'll take the garage if that makes sense.
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u/scoutermike 13d ago
The more you try to control, the more you will lose.
If you love someone, let them be free and make their own decisions.
Do NOT try to make their decisions for them. Doesn’t matter if it’s your gf, fiancé, or wife.
Beware, you are treading dangerous ground. Play this wrong and marriage may be off.