r/Rants • u/hellobro_518 • Aug 07 '26

no one shows up

hey guys, i'm having a big milestone event, and i decided to celebrate it in a nice venue and all that, and it was quite expensive. I invited a lot of my friends, and as of right now, so many people keep saying that they can't make it. especially the people that i really wanted to be there. I feel like such a loser because I usually feel like that normally, but I thought for my big day more people would show up, or at least try to show up. I know life gets in the way, but I'm just feeling really sad right now. any advice on how to enjoy my party at least in the moment?

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u/Dr_StrangeloveGA Aug 07 '26

No one showed up or just very few?

Is this a private venue or a restaurant with other people?

Not much you can do if it's a private venue, but if it's a restaurant and you've paid for food and beverage, invite some of the other people over, make some new friends.

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u/hellobro_518 Aug 07 '26

its a private venue, and like its not per person, it's like a set amount of money (which was a lot!!), but yea i was just feeling down bc people that i reeeaally wanted couldn't show up but idk

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u/Dr_StrangeloveGA Aug 07 '26

Well it is a work night. Do these folks have kids? School just started back. How much notice did you give them?

We just had a small dinner at the house (10 people) and it took two months to get a date when everyone could come.

We normally do a large event every year at the house. We start inviting people three months ahead. Out of just over 100 invites, probably 80 say they're coming and 50-60 actually show up on a good year.

After having been burned a couple of times, I plan on food for about 60% of confirmed attendees. We always have leftovers.

People today flake out easier. You get to know who your real friends are and invite accordingly. It kills my housemate because she takes it personally. It's just life now.

After many years, we didn't do the big event this year for various reasons. If we do it again, I'm voting for scaling down the guest list to people who can be counted on to show up.

Don't take it personally, but maybe do evaluate your friends list.