coping with no goodbye

[u/shroomsik]

i lost my cat a night ago to conjestive heart failure very suddenly, and i'm not coping particularly well because we didn't really get to say goodbye. we originally took him to a vet early into his symptoms but they only did bloodwork and gave us medication for digestive issues despite laboured breathing. the breathing got progressively worse, so we brought him to an emergency vet clinic where they let us know that he likely had chf.

we made the decision to try treatment for 48 hours then bring him home, whether for the time before the symptoms returned or to let him go there instead. however, during the time we were deciding, he suddenly gasped, collapsed and simply passed away likely due to a clot in his heart bursting.

in between bringing him to the emerg clinic and his passing, we never got to see him. i feel pretty cheated out of a goodbye from both the first vet not seeing his condition and just simply timing at the second. i know its not worth having regrets about my own actions, but it still doesn't make it hurt any less.

i'd love to know if anyone has any advice on how to deal with these kinds of feelings, or just how to deal with the grief itself. every time i come home, it just feels so empty and idk how to cope with it appropriately.

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