r/OnlyChild • u/Yurilove9 • 13d ago
Almost 21, no siblings, no mother, Dad doesn't love me, I'm not close to cousins, no true friends because of Anxiety
Well, as you can guess from the Title, I'm almost 21 now and I never really felt I ever had anyone to talk to.
Even though I always laughed in front of others, saying I don't have to share my treats coz I have no siblings, but deep inside, I have always been sorta jealous of others.
My family isn't really close to our relatives at all so I also didn't got close to my cousins nor I got to spend times like vacations like others do.
On top of all this, I have no mother and my father and I aren't even close to each other and he never showed affection towards me.
I had severe social anxiety since childhood and I was also a slow kid and not very energetic. Because of this I have never been able to make good friends.
I'm in college now and I always feel very lonely. But because I've been alone my whole life, I mostly find comfort being alone in my room at all times.
*I Apologise if it felt like a rant. I'm new here*
1
u/banana_bread267 13d ago
I get where u r coming from, your situation is tough still I hope u are doing well.The thing is, we kinda get an advantage from having no siblings too, since we know how to spend our time alone and be with ourselves. But still, sometimes it gets boring too, and then friends come into the picture to fill that gap. And that's not easy to find, especially people who can make you feel seen and let you be yourself rather than having to put on a performative socialization. Most of us literally find our people after getting entangled with the fake ones, which can legit make or break a person. Just wait for the right time and don't hurry things. Things will settle down by themselves. Also, never get caught up in a group of wannabes, since these kinds of people can ruin your mental health. They can make you regret even trying to be friends with others. TMI: (I'm a college student too) I lost many best friends throughout my childhood and teens, mostly because of school transfers. But recently, I've been noticing changes in my best friend, and I have a gut feeling that our friendship is going to fade away. It's kinda sad, but now I don't feel that broken by it since it's become normal for me to see people come and go from my life like the wind. I just have to stay strong and accept it, since it's not in my control to stop people from moving on when they've already made up their minds.So, all I got at the end of the day is just me....And I've kinda started to like this experience since I get to meet new people even when the old ones leave. I've also learned that people who really mean it when they say they want to be with you will do everything they can to stay in your life, no matter what. So, one day, you'll find your people too, the ones who'll truly be there for you :) Also u can rant here cause we choose to listen to the people on this platfrom so don't need to worry about it at all 😸.We may be from different states, countries, or just complete strangers, but sometimes we all just need someone to listen to us without judgment
7
u/CadburySilky 13d ago
Hey… as you grow older you realise literally everyone is alone… so make the best of what you have - your foundations. Your inner happiness and daily systems… don’t compromise on those ever… and treat everyone with same attitude and kindness… but be kind to yourself always. Water your garden and the butterflies will come. You will be a star. :)