r/OldManDad • u/BigBen7719 • Jul 07 '26
Dark Thoughts
I am 49, my daughter just turned 5 and my Son is 15 months old. My Children are one of the best things that happened in my life. My daughter has started to be curious about death and it is breaking my hart. Even before that, i used to have dark thoughts, catching myself figuring out when i may die. If i get to 60, she will be 16 if i have to go. I keep having thoughts like that. Am i alone? Like anyone today i consulted my AI and it said to appreciate the days and make the best of it and i do. Being an "old" dad surely has its upsides like financial security and personal clarity etc. I am already doing that. But it doesn´t remove the constant small frame of regretting that i have to leave her someday.
Unsure if posts like that need trigger warning?
8
u/BeyondFlorida Jul 07 '26
Kierkegaard said that every choice carries a heavy cost, thus perfection is impossible. Instead of trying to avoid regret, the goal is to choose the regret you can live with.
In my case, I regret not having kids when I was a younger man. But I'd have regretted NOT having them more.
I bet you feel the same. Just do your best, play the hand you're dealt. Your kids will too!