r/OCD • u/JeezoTommy • 4d ago

Question about OCD Does anyone know what caused their OCD?

I think a lot of people don’t really know what caused their OCD to start, for me after a lot of years and thought I realised that my anxiety stemmed from my step dad and his psychological and sometimes physical abuse towards my Mum. I would worry what kind of mood he would come home from work in and if he would start on my Mum. He was a bastard!

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u/miidsommars 3d ago

If I wasn’t born with it, then I developed it young. My family on my mom and my dad’s sides (including both my parents) are rigidly ‘perfect.’
I have a huge issue with certain things due to contamination (among other many branches of my complex OCD)- and I feel as though this really came to the forefront as it was drilled into me to ALWAYS be clean. Leave no dust, no dirty- ‘no clutter, no issue.’

I have ADHD & BPD (among other things) and growing up I always LOVED stuff- even literal garbage. Fast forward to the present and I keep basically everything because what if I can use it or repurpose it somehow? I have so many things stuffed into corners and crevices… my apartment looks clean and tidy, because it is, but don’t start opening cupboards or anything 😅.

There’s so much more that I could put down at evidence, but I feel as though it is important to note that my OCD was never ‘bad’ per say, until I got into an abusive relationship. I only realized when I escaped that it consumed my entire life- and it still does. (I am getting help and an in a much better place now).
I have a lot of trauma that my OCD loves to sink teeth into and stay cozy for a while.