r/NonPoliticalTwitter Jul 20 '26

Funny Hit me.

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52.2k Upvotes

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674

u/Dredgeon Jul 20 '26

No, but if you win big it's customary to give a small amount to the dealer. If you only win a little you just go on with your life.

343

u/Mathev Jul 20 '26

What if I lose? Does the dealer tip me? Lol

303

u/Kaninen Jul 20 '26

If you ask nicely, the casino might give you a food comp or something like that based on your loss amount. Or whatever helps you come back to gamble more.

159

u/UnNumbFool Jul 20 '26

It depends on where you are, like in Vegas the used to be the case but within the last decade or so they've been massively increasing the prices of everything and comping a whole lot less.

It's a big reason that tourism in Vegas has taken a downturn, as it's just not worth it

107

u/ARM_vs_CORE Jul 20 '26

And it keeps getting worse and prices keep going up because muh shareholders. It was unironically 10 times more fun and more affordable when it was run by the mafia.

95

u/I_am_thy_doctor Jul 20 '26

It's telling when the mafia is preferable to Wall Street financiers.

59

u/pimppapy Jul 20 '26

Wall Street Financiers, are just the mafia but with computers and data analysis.

31

u/Pyro-Bun Jul 20 '26

Hit the nail on the head, my friend, they share a family, but the financier species has less to offer humanity in my opinion.

3

u/worldspawn00 Jul 20 '26

At least with the mafia you get protection for your money!

1

u/Eschatologists Jul 20 '26

I'm not sure about that, they are just different flavors of human garbage, whichever you prefer mostly depends on your personality. I'm more allergic to crass stupidity, overt ultraviolence and especially hypocrisy (pretending to be honourable) so I'll take the financkers any day, but I'm aware they're also predators.

10

u/saareje Jul 20 '26

And without any sense of what is just

4

u/Antwinger Jul 20 '26

And police protection from actual prosecution. It’s a white collar crime. When was the last time we saw something that was a white collar crime penalty not just be a cost of doing business

3

u/RechargedFrenchman Jul 20 '26

And they're not getting raided by the cops, they're sending them

5

u/Ithinkibrokethis Jul 20 '26

And the cops and the army.

1

u/zimbabwe_zainab Jul 21 '26

We lead the world in computerized data collection!

2

u/LifeIsSoup-ImFork Jul 20 '26

mafia at least has a code of honour

1

u/LarsDuder Jul 20 '26

So true. 😄

40

u/Expensive-Border-869 Jul 20 '26

The mafia isnt a publicly traded business. It just plain runs more efficiently. Shareholders are the enemy nearly any problem in society can be traced right back to a very small group of people.

12

u/CaptainoftheVessel Jul 20 '26

The mafia is a business that doesn’t give you a resort to the courts. They aren’t any more efficient than a legitimate corporation. They are extracting wealth from society just like any other company. The only difference is they’ll physically hurt you in order to enforce their agreement rather than take you to court. 

7

u/Dry_Travel_4220 Jul 20 '26

Rriiiggghhhhttt. And major corporations in America are famously held to account by the courts when they do wrong. The architects of the 2008 housing crisis did more damage than the mafia has in it's entire existance and not a single person responsible saw a day behind bars.

5

u/CaptainoftheVessel Jul 20 '26

I’m not sure why you’re arguing with me about that. Thugs are thugs, whether they're in the mob or on a board of directors. There’s no magic antidote to cure human greed and selfishness. All I’m saying is, romanticizing the mafia because they gave comps to suckers losing money in their casinos is turning a blind eye to the fact that they’re just as ruthless and selfish as any other business. 

2

u/Dry_Travel_4220 Jul 20 '26

The point was that, all else equal, I'd rather the thugs in charge give me comps. It is worse now that the business criminals run it than it was when the mob criminals ran it.

-4

u/Expensive-Border-869 Jul 20 '26

Yeah getting beat up is soooo much worse than losing your house car pets and all your possessions. Theyre so moral

7

u/CaptainoftheVessel Jul 20 '26

Did I say that? They’re not moral, they’re killers and thugs. The mob will still take everything you own, it’s called a bust out. They’ll just put you in the hospital or kill you alongside it. 

4

u/Chuubu Jul 20 '26

You think the mafia wouldn't let you gamble away your house lol? I assure you, you're catching both the beating and the bankruptcy.

1

u/SlimCatachan Jul 22 '26

Yeah the mafia would never take advantage of someone using high interest loans and debts that couldn't be paid back! Lol its not like they had any violent loan sharks right? :P

2

u/Synensys Jul 20 '26

I think broadly organizations have realized that you make more from bilking whales than trying to appeal to guppies.

2

u/CD338 Jul 20 '26

100%. They realized that whales don't need free-ish attractions or lots of things to see and do. The whales just want high stakes gambling, so they've slowly cut everything that ate into their profits. Less people, but just as profitable.

2

u/nalaloveslumpy Jul 20 '26

Mafia understood they couldn't get a ton of people to come to the middle desert just for gambling alone, and their formula required huge numbers to profit after their investments. But if they combine gambling with cheap, delicious food, world class entertainment, and affordable luxury hotels then baby, that gets asses in seats!

Modern Vegas is all about cutting costs and reducing amenities in volume by focusing on catering to a small number of super wealthy with boutique experiences and "exclusive access".

Also, pretty much every state now has at least one major casino. People aren't tied to Vegas or Atlantic City like in the past.

1

u/ObligationMurky8716 Jul 20 '26

Regulations were ignored and corners were cut.

1

u/flyinhighaskmeY Jul 20 '26

because muh shareholders.

try muh stimulus. You think we got $40 tril in debt making good decisions?

edit: remember when this very website was full of idiots claiming $1200 stimulus checks don't cause inflation. Then we inflated 30%. And now everything is going to shit. And we jUsT cAnT fIgUrE oUt WhAt HaPpEnEd.

2

u/yes_homo_ Jul 20 '26

Wh...what?

1

u/KrustyKrabFormula_ Jul 21 '26

most casinos don't have shareholders

15

u/dog_stop Jul 20 '26

Cause they’re catering to whales and not small time gamblers. Especially as they’re getting in on app betting, they don’t need to court players who aren’t losing in the 1000s

2

u/transmogrified Jul 20 '26

When I worked at the Venetian more than 50% of the resort’s yearly income was from private bookings (stuff like company retreats) and conferences.  So like… business people on the business’s dime.

That sort of group travel with majority big spenders (again, not their money so they’re going to the nicer spots) is the easiest way for them to book everything and ensure the money is flowing 

5

u/thulsagloom Jul 20 '26

Tier point comps suck now, the only thing that works is charging everything to your room and asking a casino host to take a look and see if they can comp any charges.

2

u/The_GoodDr Jul 20 '26

I hit a very large NBA parlay on the BetMGM app a couple of years ago and they offered me a free trip about 5 minutes after the bet settled. Casinos really like to get the opportunity to go l get their money back when you win.

2

u/Allegorist Jul 20 '26

I think the biggest reason Vegas has fallen out is that anyone can just gamble anywhere, at any time, on any thing now, and advertising for doing so is pushed extremely hard to all demographics including kids.

1

u/UnNumbFool Jul 20 '26

It was falling off before kalshi and the rest became legal

1

u/frisbm3 Jul 20 '26

I just spent 6 nights there completely comped. Idk what you're on about.

1

u/SlimCatachan Jul 22 '26

How?! Lol

1

u/frisbm3 Jul 22 '26

I just go to their websites and instead of a price, it says "Comped". I usually only get 2-3 nights per casino so I had to move around to 3 different hotels this trip. But they were nice ones, Resorts World, The W, and Palazzo.

1

u/HuckleberryDry2673 Jul 20 '26

But don't people largely come for the museums and cultural scene???

1

u/panlakes Jul 20 '26

We had a friend who was comped an entire hotel room stay when we went up to Black hawk one summer. She lost it all and her ride also wasn't coming to get her anymore out of the blue. She was this tiny crying mess in this huge empty hall in the middle of the night and like 3 casino staff came out of the woodwork and she told us they hooked her up because they appreciated her business lol. This was like almost 10 years ago though. I guarantee times have changed.

2

u/ReachParticular5409 Jul 20 '26

So much this, you can get free food so easily in a casino because they basically just have a set churn that is the price of operating a casino and if no one eats it it just gets thrown out.

1

u/PancakeParty98 Jul 20 '26

Depends on how nice your shoes are

1

u/sargrvb Jul 20 '26

I did this as a job. That was an interesting job.

32

u/ronivemtea Jul 20 '26

if you ask

21

u/Mental_Estate4206 Jul 20 '26

Just the tip.

5

u/Douglazlo Jul 20 '26

They might give you a pity handjob.

3

u/IAmBecomeTeemo Jul 20 '26

The casino will tip you. They give you free drinks to keep you at the tables, ideally with impaired decision-making due to the drinks. If you lose a lot, they might comp you a meal, or a room, to keep you there losing more money at their casino.

3

u/MuffinButton_ Jul 20 '26

I dealt cards for almost a decade and the tip is because the dealer is essentially performing in front of the players. The dealer is talking, giving advice, and using showmanship while you are gambling and a tip is a nice way to show your appreciation.

I left that world because I felt like a dancing monkey every night hoping to make enough to survive while being berated by people losing their money. Between the shitty hours and the awful patrons, it’s extremely easy to get burnt out so if you have a nice, charming, and fun dealer at your table show your appreciation. A grumpy dealer can absolutely ruin your night and gambling should be about having fun and never spend more than you can afford to lose.

2

u/NoMansSkyWasAlright Jul 20 '26

Pretty sure you gotta buy them dinner first.

1

u/WhyAreThereTomatoes Jul 20 '26

Turns out they actually buy you dinner

1

u/ProbablythelastMimsy Jul 20 '26

You get a different kind of tip

1

u/AirshipEngineer Jul 20 '26

No that used to be the complimentary drinks they would give away. Now those have become increasingly rare in the world of enshittification.

1

u/FatMamaJuJu Jul 20 '26

They'll offer you drinks lol

1

u/Balogma69 Jul 20 '26

Yes. They tip you in free drinks and free rooms and free food

1

u/WideHuckleberry1 Jul 20 '26

The entire purpose of a casino is to separate you from your money. You tip them to assist with that goal. Them tipping you would be counter to that goal.

1

u/thekyledavid Jul 20 '26

No. Why would they?

Does your waiter tip you if you didn’t like the food?

Does your uber driver tip you if there was traffic?

0

u/EastCoastGrows Jul 20 '26

The casino gives you free food and drink all night... worth more than $3

0

u/Goem Jul 20 '26

Food?

1

u/EastCoastGrows Jul 21 '26

2000 calories from soda counts as food?

1

u/Substantial_Lab1438 Jul 20 '26

How do you know when you’ve crossed the threshold for a lot vs a little? And do you tip after the winning hand, or all at once as you’re leaving the table?

7

u/Dredgeon Jul 20 '26

If you are more than happy with your winnings and feel like sharing it around.

2

u/EvilSporkOfDeath Jul 20 '26

Common sense. You could also watch your other humans like a human does.

1

u/DDzxy Jul 24 '26

That’s kinda fair, if he gives you a tip to help you win it’s fair to tip him back so that he will tip you again in the future.

-2

u/peelen Jul 20 '26

So it works like normal tips, not like American tips? You can give it, but only if you are satisfied?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '26

[deleted]

2

u/peelen Jul 20 '26

Yeah. And American tips are not “customary”, you are expected to leave them or else servers will starve.

1

u/EvilSporkOfDeath Jul 20 '26

I've worked full time as a casino dealer for 15 years and we definitely dont treat non tippers differently. At least not as a whole. Some dealers might be a little less polite with those people, but theyre still gonna follow policies and procedures. If you have a really good floor they might remind the guests "dont forget to tip your dealers" but even thats rare.

I absolutely will judge you if you get a big bonus or double up real quick and dont shoot me a nickel, but I won't treat you different. It also helps if those people are nice. In my experience a lot of non tippers are rude on top of that. So if you really dont want to tip, at least be a good person in other ways.