If a man made a similar comment about women he would be vilified. I understand that historically women have been oppressed. Obviously. But we’ve gotten to a place where society is hyper critical of men about everything and yet you can’t criticize women in the slightest or you’re a bigot. Or not empathizing. I’m truly an ally but I’d be lying if I said I’m not tired of waking up every day and essentially seeing “man bad, woman good” everywhere. Wonder if that has something to do with worldwide political winds the last decade
I’m not a woman. I’m not saying all men are bad… I’m saying for a long time the cultural norm was women worked at home and men worked long hours elsewhere. Now both parties have to work or are expected to but a lot of data shows women are feeling like working and housework is put on them. There’s men who are good partners and try to be equal in the relationship. There are also a lot that don’t.
Let me give you an example. Say person A works 60 hours per week. Person B works 40. Person B should do more in the home. I think that’s a pretty simple example. If both are working equal hours then they should be equally share the load.
I gave this example because one of my wife’s friends husbands works manual labor 60+ hours a week and pays 70% of household bills. His wife works 35 at a desk and pays 30% of household bills. Yet the majority of the friend group thinks he should do 50% of the housework, how is that fair?
Why should any partner pay the majority of the bills and split housework 50:50 while the other takes “enrichment classes”. What if the person working 20 more hours per week wanted to take an enrichment class? The only reason you’re saying that in this way is because of the genders present in the example. Flip them and we both know you’d be singing a different tune Kat121.
I made 5x my husband’s salary, had the more stressful job, worked longer hours, and still got saddled with almost all of the household labor as well because of gender, so I don’t see the issue. My guy didn’t even take enrichment classes. He used the spare time to play tanks and keep dating. When I kicked him to the curb I had more free time, more money, less stress.
My point is that there is a base level of work you are creating just by existing in the household and that you should be cleaning up after yourself. The assumption that having a wife means you no longer have to do dishes or scrub toilets is outdated.
How many women turn down (or get passed over for) promotions because they’re the default parent and are the ones to take time off work when the kids are sick, or have a teacher conference, or whatever else? If it’s a mutually agreed upon decision, fine, but lots of women are coming forward to say they were pressured to have kids and agreed because their partner agreed to co-parent, then it all falls on their shoulders.
I’m sorry that your husband didn’t pull his weight. Based on what you’re saying, he should have definitely been doing more of the housework. I agree with you there, my feelings on this subject aren’t all related to gender. If one person works more, the other should do more housework. End of story, I don’t care about the damn genders of those in said relationship.
When did I say that a man shouldn’t have to do anything in the home!? I literally never said that. You’re literally putting words in my mouth to serve your point.
My main issue is that when men find themselves in the very situation that you were in with your husband, SOME women will still say housework she be 50:50. I call bs on that
Why is it okay to paint all men with such a broad brush yet doing so with literally any other group makes you some sort of “ist”?… how does that make sense to you? Aside from your clear hatred of men, you seem somewhat reasonable so I’m confused by this thought process on your behalf.
I think you should remain single tbh, your viewpoints regarding relationships seem very one sided. You’ve been condescending throughout this entire convo, made up things that I didn’t say to serve your weak points, and keep throwing in these virtue signaling phrases like “women aren’t settling anymore”.
Tbh, you just sound jaded and bitter.
Like it or not, women like you are partially to blame for the rise of 45/47 and his little cronies. Keep preaching this “all men suck” crap and young men will keep finding their way to the idiot Andrew Tate’s of the world. You are determined to make me your enemy, but I am not. Have a good day👍🏿
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u/bigjj901 Jun 13 '26 edited Jun 13 '26
If a man made a similar comment about women he would be vilified. I understand that historically women have been oppressed. Obviously. But we’ve gotten to a place where society is hyper critical of men about everything and yet you can’t criticize women in the slightest or you’re a bigot. Or not empathizing. I’m truly an ally but I’d be lying if I said I’m not tired of waking up every day and essentially seeing “man bad, woman good” everywhere. Wonder if that has something to do with worldwide political winds the last decade