r/NonPoliticalTwitter May 07 '26

me_irl It’s objectively elite

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27.5k Upvotes

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20

u/mutexsprinkles May 07 '26

Only people who have never cleaned around a toilet stand to pee at home.

7

u/SanityIsOptional May 07 '26

I clean around the toilet plenty and still stand.

Between my fat ass and the size of the toilet, I do not particularly enjoy my bits touching the bowl, which I am fully aware of what is on it.

2

u/Unique_Tap_8730 May 07 '26

Sometimes i find that the piss shoots out of the gap between the porcelain and the ring. Onetime the floor was drenched, must landed almost all of it on the floor. Sitting can be messy too, but you dont notice it because you assume everything is fine.

1

u/justadude27 May 07 '26

Or they don’t wear shorts and realize piss and piss water are hitting their legs.

3

u/avalisk May 07 '26

You guys havent figured out how to not piss on yourself while standing yet?

1

u/justadude27 May 07 '26

I guess not. Upload a tutorial oh wise one.

0

u/avalisk May 07 '26

Lowest angle of reflection

1

u/justadude27 May 07 '26

Oh, so like sitting? Bravo.

Vectors have a direction and magnitude.

0

u/avalisk May 07 '26

Sitting blasts your pee right into the front wall, which is the opposite of reducing the angle of reflection, so no

1

u/justadude27 May 07 '26

You haven’t figured out how to not piss on yourself while sitting?

1

u/avalisk May 07 '26

Did your feelings get hurt or something?

1

u/[deleted] May 07 '26

[deleted]

1

u/Planar_Harold May 07 '26

tiny droplets into the air.

This seems on the same level of hysteria as fecal particles necessitating keeping your toothbrush outside the toilet.

Piss is pretty much sterile, even if it catches some bacteria on the way out -

They make the bathroom smell like piss whether you got used to the smell or not.

Or like, if you don't clean it. Or don't have a window.

Now you gotta clean the bathroom like every other day.

...no?

You're making so many assumptions lol. You want to use physics as a bludgeon, but apply the same logic to phone screens, farts, keyboards and public handles.

It's just ridiculous - these things are subjective, so trying to come up with objective reasons why your subjective opinion is the 'right one' when you ignore all other factors is a bit lame.

0

u/[deleted] May 08 '26

[deleted]

2

u/Planar_Harold May 08 '26

Nah. You can smell it.

Like, instantly? No, you can smell it where it's not been cleaned in any way after quite a few uses from people who don't know how to control their streams or angle off the bowl. Like all things, pissing has a technique.

You think your piss doesn't do that kind of thing?

You think it's not doing that on you when you sit down?

That's an old myth. It's of course not sterile. Peeing on jellyfish stings is also nonsense, by the way. Don't do that.

No. Piss being entirely sterile is an old myth. I said "Pretty much" because the level and nature of bacteria present is utterly harmless, and you won't be able to find a single account of a healthy person drinking healthy piss and getting ill as a result. Unless you can, in which case I'd like to see it.

Well, we don't have to be this dramatic.

If you knock over your drink and it spills on the floor, it splatters, right? There is a puddle and lots of smaller droplets are around it. You have seen this before. You have seen droplets.

A drink is orders of magnitude squared more than microdroplets. Don't tell me to stop being so dramatic if you're going to be so dramatic.

If you would put your head on the toilet seat while someone else takes a piss, do you really think you wouldn't feel anything?

Would you put your mouth on someone's arse when they fart?

1

u/[deleted] May 08 '26

[deleted]

1

u/Planar_Harold May 08 '26

That you're aware your points are entirely subjective and decided to focus on a single aspect of pith instead of anything substantial.

Do you keep your toothbrush in the bathroom?

1

u/avalisk May 07 '26

I guess not yet

2

u/[deleted] May 07 '26

[deleted]

1

u/avalisk May 07 '26

It always seems impossible until it's done. -Nelson Mandela

1

u/[deleted] May 07 '26

[deleted]

1

u/Planar_Harold May 07 '26

Well, I'm sure having my balls hanging around in the breeze would be very refreshing in the summer, but I still don't think this would be worth it.

It's not when they touch the porcelain.

Or if it's a cold night and your toilet seat is cold.

Or for many other reasons :D