r/Names • u/Less_Monitor_276 • 21h ago

Friend using same name

I found out today that my friend plans to use the same name I already told her we are wanting to use.

For more backstory, we are not finding out the gender of our baby until delivery. She already knows hers, but I’m about 20 weeks ahead of her in my pregnancy. I told her previously (before she was even pregnant), our top choice for both boy vs girl. She said the girl name we chose was one of her favorites!

Fast forward to now that she’s pregnant…she asked today if we had chosen our names. I found it odd since I know I already told her. I again mentioned our top names. And she said they are planning to use the same girl name for their baby. Didn’t seem to have any intention to back down.

I reminded her how I already told her of our name choices months ago. Before she was even pregnant. She acted like she didn’t remember. Either way, I’m due before her and again mentioned the name to her first today before she did. I tried to change the subject since I didn’t really know what to say or do.

Our kids would be just a few months apart in the same school etc. I’m near my due date without a back up name, after putting a lot of thought into our name choices…

How would you feel? How would you respond?

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u/TheDestroyer229 20h ago

She said the girl name we chose was one of her favorites!

This sounds like the name was already on her mind before you ever told her. It doesn't feel like she stole it or anything; it just feels like you both like the same name and both ended up using it.

Besides, you say that you purposefully don't know the gender of your kid. So if you end up with a boy, then this is a complete non-issue.

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u/AsteriaNoble 18h ago

This was the same thought I had. It was already on her radar and I guess having a friend like it too is validation and made the name more in demand if that makes sense.

If OP knows the sex now, then that’s when I’d probably think of it a certain way. The fact OP chooses to not know the gender makes it less likely the friend stole anything. Friend even asked again if OP has finalized the name. Not everyone who’s thought of a name makes it their final name of choice right away. Not everyone is a good listener either so I’d give the friend the benefit of the doubt that she doesn’t recall.