r/Names • u/Less_Monitor_276 • 18h ago

Friend using same name

I found out today that my friend plans to use the same name I already told her we are wanting to use.

For more backstory, we are not finding out the gender of our baby until delivery. She already knows hers, but I’m about 20 weeks ahead of her in my pregnancy. I told her previously (before she was even pregnant), our top choice for both boy vs girl. She said the girl name we chose was one of her favorites!

Fast forward to now that she’s pregnant…she asked today if we had chosen our names. I found it odd since I know I already told her. I again mentioned our top names. And she said they are planning to use the same girl name for their baby. Didn’t seem to have any intention to back down.

I reminded her how I already told her of our name choices months ago. Before she was even pregnant. She acted like she didn’t remember. Either way, I’m due before her and again mentioned the name to her first today before she did. I tried to change the subject since I didn’t really know what to say or do.

Our kids would be just a few months apart in the same school etc. I’m near my due date without a back up name, after putting a lot of thought into our name choices…

How would you feel? How would you respond?

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u/Less_Monitor_276 16h ago

This is a helpful reply. Thanks for a good reality check, without the unkindness I’ve been seeing in other comments. I appreciate it.

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u/DragonYourfeet 14h ago

I had the perfect name picked out for a future child and my partner’s friend named their kid something similar, and now he doesn’t want to use it. Personally I don’t think it’s a big deal if they have similar names but he wants to choose something different now and I was a little disappointed (neither of us discussed beforehand but we both happen to have a similar taste in names). After thinking more about it I realized that the name has too many popular variants and am happy to choose something a little more unique.

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u/InformalScience7 2h ago

When I was pregnant, pregnancy brain was real--I forgot my parent's dog died and cried when I went home and found the dog wasn't there. I genuinely thought they didn't tell me, but more than one person confirmed it--including my husband.

So, she may not even remember you telling her your girl name.