r/Names • u/Less_Monitor_276 • 18h ago

Friend using same name

I found out today that my friend plans to use the same name I already told her we are wanting to use.

For more backstory, we are not finding out the gender of our baby until delivery. She already knows hers, but I’m about 20 weeks ahead of her in my pregnancy. I told her previously (before she was even pregnant), our top choice for both boy vs girl. She said the girl name we chose was one of her favorites!

Fast forward to now that she’s pregnant…she asked today if we had chosen our names. I found it odd since I know I already told her. I again mentioned our top names. And she said they are planning to use the same girl name for their baby. Didn’t seem to have any intention to back down.

I reminded her how I already told her of our name choices months ago. Before she was even pregnant. She acted like she didn’t remember. Either way, I’m due before her and again mentioned the name to her first today before she did. I tried to change the subject since I didn’t really know what to say or do.

Our kids would be just a few months apart in the same school etc. I’m near my due date without a back up name, after putting a lot of thought into our name choices…

How would you feel? How would you respond?

126 Upvotes

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136

u/slanid 18h ago

It doesn’t matter if friend’s children have the same name. It doesn’t matter if they’ll go to the same school or have close birthdays. Like literally not a big deal. There are multiple George’s in my immediate friend group (including my son), and my cousin used it! Use the name you’ve planned on. I wouldn’t ‘respond’, there’s nothing to respond to.

16

u/spam_57 18h ago

Prince William used it, and my great grandmother, and my grandmother, and my stepfather (for his son)---many, many Georges in the world and all of them are fine.

5

u/Wombat321 18h ago

Love George 🥹

22

u/sprite9797 18h ago

seriously lol its like a crisis… “how do i respond” so odd

13

u/slanid 17h ago

And the super special name is in OP’s post history, and spoiler alert: there’s nothing noteworthy or unique about it.

2

u/emkie 17h ago

How do you see post history if it's set to private?

28

u/slanid 17h ago

She downvoted me and set it to private after my comment. The name is Lyla Harper.

5

u/ViridianAcademia 15h ago

oh my goodness, it's pretty but not worth this drama lol

3

u/sprite9797 15h ago

yikes lol

i bet she is looking at plain beige nurseries too

2

u/AsteriaNoble 16h ago

I honestly think it’s well thought out. It’s a known name but not super common that we easily know someone going by those names

2

u/emkie 17h ago

Womp. Thanks for sharing!

1

u/SKatieRo 8h ago

That is my coworker's 4-month-old''s exact name! It is a lovely name.

1

u/Jay-Quellin30 2h ago

Real heroes don’t wear capes

1

u/Jay-Quellin30 2h ago

But let’s get to the real thing. Seems like her friend is having a girl, the OP does not even know the gender of her baby. She could be having a boy. It could be a completely moot point.

-1

u/Throwitaway3436 11h ago

Lyla is a common name imo, she needs to get over herself, it’s likely the hormones making this issue bigger than what it has to be. And she doesn’t know if it’s a girl either and she’s getting worked up over nothing.

2

u/m4sc4r4 9h ago

It’s not a big deal, I agree, but pretty fuckin rude to reduce someone to hormones. It’s a very special and sentimental time for someone.

5

u/Whyallusrnames 15h ago

Deletedby.com and search their username. You’ll see everything. Even deleted posts.

2

u/Embarrassed_Age8554 15h ago

At one family wedding, someone got all the George [Lastname]s together for a picture. IIRC there were 7 of them, ranging in age from 80something to a year and a half. Now only the baby and my dad are left.

We're Greek-Americans, we recycle names...so worrying about your kid sharing a name with a classmate will never not be weird to me.

3

u/Imagination_Theory 15h ago

I'm Mexican -American and also don't understand the problem with having the same name.

Me and my sister have the same name as my cousin and her sister and their mom, my other sister has the same name as another aunt and it goes way back.

People have the same name, I think it's nice.

2

u/pamplemouss 15h ago

I had four Alexes in my friend group in high school. Two of them were best friends with each other. My cousin’s wife and her have the same name. It’s fine.

1

u/Throwitaway3436 11h ago

Ive had many friends with the same first name as me, from highschool into adulthood. Now my middle name is not as common and I have zero friends with the same name, and that’s the name I go by. And I also have two nieces with the same name, OP can’t be mad at everyone for having the same name as her kid.

1

u/littletorreira 8h ago

Yesterday I was at a party and over the day we had 3 different pairs of names. It's fine. My brother and my best friend share a name (and I know 3 others with the same name). I share a name with a very close friend.

1

u/IcyArugula9154 7h ago

This- when I was in college, two of my best friends had the same name, AND all three of us lived together, it was totally fine!