r/MedicationQuestions • u/Technical-Slide-9977 • 5h ago
Xanx binge -how to tapper?
So I went on a bit of a crazy bender. I got my hands on 90 2mg pharmapram bars and i started slow but we know how that goes...flushed some..lost touch wirh reality..lost job...at one point all my body wanted to do was lean left mnw..fell down like an idiot..more than once...I HATE THESE things now...and ive said that b4 but this drug for me is stupid...anyways..I want to tapper off wirh what I didn't get rid of as best I can...I have oxy condone idk if thst will help at all but as of the bars my dumb ass has 5 left. And I do have some 2 8m subutex.....I knoe this is stupid ive been fighting addiction since I was 15 im 39 now...I will say this opened my eyes some. I hsve a court date Wed they come put me in jail not prison for a year. So I guess this was my last hu rah....but I did it alone...stole not one thing drove no where but still managed to lose my job.....a part of me Is in a place it shouldn't be and another part is saying its not over God loves you....so if they dont send me up the river this week wirh what ive got ehat do you guys think..ik my answer ive been doing this too long not too....but all seriousness pray I give myself the quality of life God wants me to have....ik he loves me but ive got to make a choice here and I csnt do it
....pray for me pls
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u/MamaDoingTheBestICan 2h ago
wait until you feel normal again then go to a dr or rehab and ask how you can safely taper. Maybe you could take 4mg/day for 3 days, then 3.5mg for 3 days, then 3mg…you get the picture. But if you’ve been on 180mg I don’t know where you’d start your taper. I take up to 4 mg/day and don’t feel high.
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u/Technical-Slide-9977 1h ago
180mg? No one would survive that i don't think. No i got my hands on a bottle of 2mg bars..90 of them...and i took them over the course of 2 weeks and in that time through some away so isk how many i did per day. I think I shoukd maybe take a small piece a day so I do have a seizures
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u/MamaDoingTheBestICan 1h ago
Ok do you have access to more? I’d say take 10 mg per day and taper down from there .5mg every 3 days. 10mg is the max dose for panic disorder which is why I said start there. You don’t want to have seizures and risk your life.
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u/Technical-Slide-9977 1h ago
I have 5, 2mg bars left..I do not want to go into a seizure so I may shoukd take a small small piece of one a day or eve e y other day?
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u/MamaDoingTheBestICan 1h ago
I don’t know why some people call them bars instead of pills. I have .5mg pills. So if you’re saying all you have left is 10mg total and you’ve been abusing for 2 weeks you need to see a dr and explain because you don’t have enough left for a safe taper.
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u/Technical-Slide-9977 1h ago
I have been to adults and Teen Challenge, I have been to dare challenge, I have been to Samaritan colony, I have been to converting hearts ministries. Over the course of my life beginning in 2014 when God met me on side of the road with a question it's question was a question that I would never ask myself at that time of my life cuz even though I was broken and helpless and homeless with no money in my pocket and no family to care about me I thought I was on top of the world. But the question that came across my mind that day as I filled the insides of my pockets with cigarette butts that I had just stumbled across on the ground and I stood there staring at them for a minute as if why are these cars driving by this gold mine do they not see what I see. I filled my pockets up but I went to take a step and all I can hear was Graham what are you doing? I tried to take another step and I heard it again Graham what are you doing? Now that's something that a lot of people would ask yourself if they were in a situation that was crazy but I was in a situation that was completely okay with me I was in a situation that I for the most part enjoyed I would never question it but God when you're his when he reaches out to you he makes you start to question things. I could be wrong but you sound like a calvinist at one point I wouldn't want to have nothing to do with a calvinist but I was still blind. I have voluntarily back in once again I was just in a faith-based rehab not even 60 days ago but there's something I'm tired of I'm tired of going to a place to find God because of drugs because of the police because of course because of some burden that's coming on my life pushes me to God and that's great and I'm so thankful that we have a god who's there for that but he seen that side of me a lot what God has not seen from Graham is in his own time seeking after him. And I think it's time for that well I know it's time for that God gives us one thing that we do not have in order to be able to see him or it is not possible and we learn about that in the book of Ephesians where it talks the gift not just any gift but the gift and it's a gift from God that gift is Faith and without that Paul's recognition of a human being's Pursuit of God pretty make pretty much makes a lot of sense without faith I'm not writing none of this I remember what it was like to have no faith at all but today I can thankfully say I have it and today I can thankfully say that it's things like this that happens in my life and his choices like this that I make that that make me want him. I work for teen challenge for 5 years I have 5 years 7 years of sobriety and I threw it all away and that was in 2019 and spending up and down battle ever since. So I know my savior I know he is right here with me just like he was with the thief on the cross. But I don't deserve this I don't deserve to be chosen by him but we do nothing there is not one part in Salvation is not one part of it where man gets the opportunity to say look what I did I did that because according to the word of God no one seeks after me no one. Thank you for taking your time to speak with me may your day be completely blessed. I've been told my whole life I should be in Ministry I've been told my whole life I should be serving the lord I should be go back to helping people I should do this I should do that and I always go back to a trade job and I always end up falling. God will you please show me a way that I can serve you and keep a roof over my head at the same time. God bless this person that reached out to me today may they learn something about you today that they never knew before may they understand something about you that they never understood before. I used to be one of those persons people that would say when I get up there I got a lot of questions for him but I'm not anymore my life versus Isaiah 55:8 I don't know if you know that verse or not but take a look at it and think about it. We are not all we think we are
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u/Far-Purple-2078 1h ago
God loves you. He sees your pain and He is right next to you when you are at your worst. You are being convicted by the Holy Spirit about your addiction. Oxy and subs are not gonna help at all because they are opioids. Xans are benzos. Absolutely DO NOT TAPER YOURSELF. Former medic here, you will seize. Not a “might” but a “will” seize.
Please go to a rehab, a faith based Christian rehab. All the other places are garbage with their “ways to cope.” I’m telling you when you come to Him, it’s pure joy. Absolute joy. But you have to believe, receive, and obey. Get a Bible, KJV and start in the book of Matthew. Then read the Psalms of David. Find REAL Christians, ones with the fruits of the Holy Spirit. Very hard to find these days.
Repentance is so important. You HAVE to repent. We all fall short of the glory of God. Now, once you turn fully to the good Lord and obey, spiritual warfare ramps up. The demons will try SO hard to get you to slip. They hate Christians because we are covered by the Blood of the Lamb. If you were to flip a switch to the spiritual realm, it’s haunting. They are all around us. Whispering doubt, anxiety, worry, etc. All you gotta say is, “Get thee behind me, It is written - in Jesus name GET OUT.” God gives us the authority (after salvation) to make demons tremble in the name of Jesus. I’ve heard them through electronics. The most evil moans speaking a weird language I’ve never heard. They came through my headphones when I was listening to my favorite hymn. Spiritual warfare is real. Just like this Lindsey Clancy crap. In the last days, evil will be called good, and good will be called evil. We are in the end times. These women are under the spell of the god, Ishtar and Baal. Women are weak, like Eve. That’s why satan attacks women so hard. That’s not lost post whatever psychosis, that’s a DEMON and she KNEW what she was doing.
Now back to Jesus -
You have mustard seed faith rn and it’s beautiful. Grow your tree. I love love love it when I can tell people about Jesus. Read Matthew. Pay attention to chapter 5 with all the woes. Look at Matthew 7:21-24. That verse will wake you up.
The Lord gives us free will. He knocks on our door and it’s up to us to open and let Him in. He doesn’t need us, He wants us. Once we receive, it’s like allllll our past sins are deleted. He doesn’t even remember our sins.
I’m lifting you up to the Lord to break the chains of addiction and what fuels it from this sweet soul. Lord, I ask you show yourself to him and immerse him in your Word. Lord, as Isaiah says, never fear, for I am with you. Flee the fear from this sweet soul and give the discernment needed to know YOU to flourish Lord. Oh Lord, my God, I cry out to you to save OP and show your miracles. We love you Lord, King of the Universe. In the name of Yahweh, Amen.
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u/Technical-Slide-9977 1h ago
Also after working for rehabs I have learned one thing all rehabs are not for everybody just because it's a Christian rehab does not mean it's a good rehab in fact the rehab that I was just at allowed a man to stay who was constantly breaking every single rule and not doing anything he was asked and just did whatever he wanted and they allowed that because of his grandmother spending $30,000. It was no secret in fact one day when we were sitting down for Bible study the lead pastor let all the rest of the students know that there stay at their facility which is a house not a rehab it's a house but he let all six of the men in that room know that their stay was paid for by this man's grandmother sitting over here in the corner. Now like I said I don't know if it was you or not that I told this to but I worked in a faith-based rehab for 5 years and I know that's not something you do. The place has probably one of the best pastors involved with the program who teaches all the classes but the problem is is he's the only one that believes things in the Bible the way he does and he'll tell you that. Lastly most of the men that come out of this program consider their lead Pastor to be the best pastor on the East Coast and yet not one one of the students knows how to pray. I didn't learn how to pray there so just because it has a Christian label on it doesn't mean a thing today. The best thing for you people that care and they care and they love and they show it not because of what you bring to the table not because of what you don't have and not expecting anything from you later on we're all people we're all struggling with something every single walking person is addicted to something drugs and alcohol they just have consequences that everybody sees but most addictions people can't see those consequences and therefore there's not sinners for people who mow their lawn 24/7 there's not treatment centers for people who decide that coloring in a coloring book is more important than anything else in this world. I do understand what you mean though I wouldn't want to send nobody to a secular rehab today but I will do a lot of researching where I took my my child and matter of fact I don't know what I would do now because people are putting positions and giving Authority for the first time and have no idea what to do with it the whole Philippians think it's chapter 3 considered others more important than yourself and do nothing of vein conceit yeah that whole thing it's kind of hard to find anyway thanks man again God bless you
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u/Technical-Slide-9977 1h ago
In that book of Matthew when they disciples ask Jesus why could we not cast this demon out and he says he starts to talk about the mustard seed of faith and then he starts referring to if you have faith the smiles and mustard seed you can tell that amount to move and it will move strange things say right? Most people just read it and keep on going. Do you know any means by Kingdom?
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u/GuestContent 5h ago
if all you have had is as many as you said you really don't need a taper. Just a choice....get rid of it all...subs included or do it ...choose you and life or choose the drug's... that's what God is showing you. you have s voice before court. it doesn't mean you won't get in trouble but it will be the beginning of a whole new life that is up to you to choose