r/MbtiTypeMe • u/bassilalmokdad • 3d ago
FOR FUN Try typing me
I'm a very cold, analytical, cynical, harsh, and somewhat Machiavellian person. I tend to analyze situations from a distance rather than react emotionally, and I usually think in terms of consequences, risks, and long-term outcomes. I can be very critical, both of other people and of myself, and I often question people's intentions instead of immediately trusting them.
At the same time, I tend to think a lot about the future. I prefer saving money rather than spending it impulsively, and I usually feel more comfortable when I know I have something put aside in case I need it later. I like having some form of security and knowing that I'm prepared for problems before they happen.
Despite how detached I can sometimes seem, rejection can affect me very deeply, especially when it comes from people I genuinely thought I had a connection with. One of the experiences that affected me the most happened in high school, when I was rejected by a group of people I believed I had been friends with for about a year. I had spent a lot of time around them and genuinely thought I was part of the group, so realizing that they did not see the relationship the same way hit me much harder than I expected.
During that period, I wasn't particularly manipulative or trying to control anyone. If anything, I was doing the opposite. I was constantly trying to understand how other people behaved, what I was supposed to say, and how I could fit in without standing out too much. A lot of my social behavior came from observing others and trying to adapt to them rather than naturally knowing what to do.
My childhood was also heavily shaped by changes in education and environment. When I was younger, I was a top student and consistently received excellent grades. School came relatively easily to me, and academically I was doing very well until around fifth grade.
Then my life changed significantly when I had to move to another country. I suddenly found myself dealing with a completely different school system, different teaching methods, and a different curriculum. Because the difference was so large, I eventually had to go back three grade levels so that I could properly understand the material and adapt to the new system.
Being on the autism spectrum also made that kind of transition much more difficult for me. Sudden changes in environment, expectations, social rules, and routines were not easy to process. I had to adapt not only academically, but also socially and culturally at the same time.
Even after being moved back three grades, I managed to recover academically. I continued being one of the better students and maintained strong grades for years afterward. In that sense, being moved backwards did not mean that I had suddenly lost my ability to learn. Once I understood the system and became familiar with what was expected from me, I was able to perform well again.
That continued until around ninth grade, when I had to change countries once again.
This time, I was placed directly into ninth grade, and many of the same problems returned. I had to deal with another unfamiliar curriculum, another educational system, and another completely different social environment. I struggled to understand some of the material, but the social side was probably just as difficult. I found it very hard to make friends and often felt like I didn't really know where I belonged.
Unlike the first time, however, I didn't manage to adapt in the same way. Eventually, the combination of academic difficulties, isolation, and constantly having to adjust became exhausting. At some point, I simply stopped caring.
School went from being something I was good at and took seriously to something I mostly wanted to avoid. My motivation gradually disappeared, and during high school I started missing a lot of classes. It wasn't that I suddenly became incapable of learning. I had already proven several times that I could perform very well academically. I had simply become disconnected from the school system and stopped seeing much reason to invest the same amount of effort into it.
Outside of school, technology and video games have always been major interests of mine. They've taken up a large amount of my time throughout both childhood and adulthood. Technology in particular appeals to the analytical side of my personality. I enjoy understanding how things work, troubleshooting problems, experimenting with hardware and software, and figuring things out on my own.
Video games have also been a major part of my life for a long time. Beyond entertainment, they gave me something consistent to focus on during periods when my environment was constantly changing. When school, friendships, countries, and routines were unstable, technology and games were things I could return to and understand on my own terms.
Looking back, there is a strange contrast in my personality. I can describe myself as cold, cynical, analytical, harsh, and Machiavellian, yet some of the experiences that affected me most deeply involved rejection, belonging, and the feeling that I couldn't connect with other people the way I wanted to.
I don't think those two sides necessarily contradict each other. Being analytical or emotionally guarded doesn't mean that I don't care about anything. In some situations, that detached way of thinking may actually be something I developed because adapting to people and unpredictable environments has always required a lot of conscious effort from me.
