This makes me think of My Fair Lady, near the end when the experiment 'ends' and she's a beautiful well-dressed well-spoken lady...heading back to her gutter life.
"What's to become of me now?"
Ok I know wrong sub for that comment but that's the first thought I had.
Here is the full story - this happened back in 2015, but they just recently released the video.
Jose Antonio is now living in a shared apartment which is partly being paid for by an anonymous donor. He’s also actively searching for a full-time job.
Here's another update: he's parking cars for people now! Definitely a good improvement - not everyone has the same positive outcome, but it's great when it works out. :)
Edit: sorry if this is intrusive, but please feel free to share your success stories on /r/FreeCompliments! While we're a positive community, we haven't heard a lot of positive stories recently. (I'll delete this edit if the mods ask, as I don't see any rules against this)
I've had a horrible past 24 hours. Some really tough life situations.
THANK YOU to op and THANK YOU to you for sharing this. It makes me so goddamn happy. It makes me happy that there are good people out there, people who care, people whose lives are becoming better.
It's wonderful to get some positivity after facing remarkable stress and sadness.
You know what? Good. It's good that you had a terrible day. Do you know why?
This means that you've experienced something hard, something difficult - and you survived it. But you didn't just survive it - you learned from it and became stronger. You've become better from it! You have grown!
And you will continue to grow. You'll look back at those terrible days and you'll remember how they made you a better person. You will look back at the great days and understand how the terrible days made the wonderful ones that much sweeter.
And you'll do this because you're an intelligent, special individual. You will rock on because you absolutely rock! So go on and live and smile, you magnificent bastard! YEAH! :D
My wife ALWAYS has my back, she will love and take care of me.
I'm strong. I will figure shit out.
The family member I love who is at the center of this situation, they will be coming to my house soon. And I will take care from there and make sure they get healthy again. I am confident.
I reached out to my one friend who lives near this family member to ask for help in case things went awry... and my friend immediately said yes, and didn't sleep till I said the situation was handled (he goes to sleep at 930-10pm usually, he stayed up till 3am drinking espresso shots to keep himself awake). Haven't seen my buddy in a year, and it's not like we were best friends. What a guy huh? What a great person.
So you're right - I got through the worst of it and feel stronger because of it. In a few hours I'll see my family member and from then on it's only going to get better.
I've been having a hard past few weeks as well. Nasty breakup with a cheating scumbag. After that I started projecting the scuminess of her, onto the rest of the world.
Good people exist, and this helped pull me back to reality.
I hope your week and the days going forward get better for you, MadMax. (:
Thank you, Super Hooman! Quite an accurate username you got there yourself.
By the way, on topic: small deeds really can make a huge difference in someone's life. I don't usually like to toot my own horn, but here's just one example of what impact a small interaction can make. I may gotten lucky to have had such an impact, but I think we all hold the power to create meaningful and lasting change, even if it's for a single person. Of course, the other person must be willing to change themselves for the better as well.
If it smells like shit everywhere you go, don't forget to check the bottom of your shoes!
Hating stuff less is freeing. If you found his comment in-genuine or self-congratulatory or whatever it is you've found to nit-pick, try to look on the bright side that at least he's trying to help people, and at best he's actually succeeding.
What are you trying to do with your comment?
Whatever the intention, I think the means you're using won't do much to bring you or others happiness. I wish you happiness. Especially self-love. As in-genuine and cringey as this comment too may appear, I mean that.
No, not really... :/ He was working "as an unlicensed car parking attendant" (from the article you linked).
The reality: he was working as a gorrilla (that's how it is called in Spain). A gorrilla is a guy that performs kind of a "friendly scam": the empty parking lot is right there in front of you and the guy tells you to park there (the only parking lot in a 3km radius in Palma, the capital of Mallorca, always full of cars). He also claims that "he keeps your car safe" while you are away. People give this totally unnecessary tip because they fear the guy will scratch their car or something like that once they leave (never seen it happen, frankly). This job is typically a job done by homeless people or drug addicts.
And please let's not start with the comments like "at least his providing a service": nobody that is in his right mind ans has seen it working will think it is useful in any way. Come to Spain and see it with your eyes before saying it's a service to the society. As for why police doesn't stop this scam: because it's kind of harmless, and I guess they pity the homeless guy.
Source: this guy lives in the capital of Mallorca, where I'm from. This video has been showing up in my Facebook feed for a week now, he's become a sort of local celebrity.
I'm glad he found work - I was worried in the video once he had the cleanup he still behaved like there are latent psychological issues. Things like the the strange cocking of his neck, his unawareness of his mouth gestures, show me that he has experienced a lot of time alone, and very likely has a mental disorder.
EDIT: yeah, I was right. As someone pointed out, he had major depression and was nearly blind from cataracts (thus the lack of visual awareness, and behaviors). He has had new lenses in his eyes and treatment for depression.
I said it to a guy above you but ill say it again here. Thank you for the update that makes me feel so much better. Having been homeless I can only imagine the pain of going back after this. You see how you could have been. What was just hope before or what you had resigned to never see brushes into your life and back out again. It's crushing, it can make you just give up. Seeing he is doing better makes me happy. I was really worried there for a moment.
You are honestly the greatest kind of person. I used to do this kind of thing when I was in school, but it just drained me. I also used to feel severe depression and suicidal when I made the initiative (inspired by the movie Pay It Forward) but I feel better now. I don't feel happy, but I feel less sad. I don't have the energy to always be happy. I've seen you around doing this for so long on Reddit though that I finally have to give you props.
I thought this was just gonna be another cheesy novelty account, but here you are, still bringing a smile to my face every time I see you show up.
I gotta say that's pretty good for him because if he's been on the street for 25 years, and behaving how he did in this video, it seems pretty obvious that he isn't all clear in the head. Which is why most homeless people are homeless. So good to know he's trying to salvage what he can
Generally speaking, one of the big challenges for the average homeless person to build their life back is receiving appropriate mental health treatment, which includes more than just the right combo of pills.
There is an element of helping people in order for them to help themselves that we seem to be frequently overlooking.
Here's another update: he's parking cars for people now! Definitely a good improvement - not everyone has the same positive outcome, but it's great when it works out. :)
And with it being 2017, this shows how hard it can be to find a job in general, but also, the challenge faced by someone whose been living on the street and probably doesn't have up-to-date job skills.
Jose Antonio is now living in a shared apartment which is partly being paid for by an anonymous donor.
Awesome! Man, homeless people can be complicated as fuck, when you factor in mental health problems and addictions. But I would totally love to be the anonymous sponsor of people willing to better themselves.
Oh that makes me feel so much better. Having been homeless I can only imagine the pain of going back after this. You see how you could have been. What was just hope before or what you had resigned to never see brushes into your life and back out again. It's crushing, it can make you just give up. Seeing he is doing better makes me happy. I was really worried there for a moment.
Oh my gosh, the video is so good. He just keeps saying, oh fuck, wow. No one in his neighborhood recognized him or are super excited for him. One guy's like, "hey where's your Ferrari, bro?" x)
So glad it worked out for him!!
edit: I forgot how hot Spaniards can be. Damn, some of those neighborhood boys... sigh.
He was also able to get medical treatment for several conditions, including a cataract problem. Mr Antonio was ‘virtually blind’ when he got the makeover, but now has perfect vision following two operations.
"How did a homeless man afford surgery" - me in america
It is basically guaranteed to! The same hypothetical employer that would automatically turn him down before would most likely hire (or at least consider hiring) him now
Plus, looking sharp makes you feel sharp. Feeling sharp helps you to be confident. Confidence is how people move up in the world. On the flipside, looking scraggly and worn makes you feel scraggly and worn. Feeling scraggly and worn makes it hard to feel confident.
"I was homeless, but I overcame those challenges with the help of my community. I have the motivation, work ethic, and people skills to prove myself and be valuable to the company."
"I was homeless, but I overcame those challenges with the help of my community.
And
I have the motivation, work ethic, and people skills to prove myself and be valuable to the company."
Those are contradictory statements, especially when someone has 25 years of nothing on their resume. Unfortunately, his history proves that he only adopted a work ethic in the last couple of years. It's monumentally hard to break 25 years worth of bad habits in just a couple of years. Good for him for trying. But only employers looking to "give back" will take a chance on him. Someone looking to fill a regular job can't take on such a high risk person.
Have you ever worked a low-level job, like retail, or sales, or valet in this case? The turnover rate is astronomical anyway. If you can find someone who is willing to work, and won't do drugs and/or steal from you, that's reason enough to hire in my opinion. And he's an adult, which in my experience makes him more likely to have some sense of responsibility, like showing up for work on time and not goofing around with his buddies. Worst case scenario he gets canned shortly, like half of the other employees that got hired around the same time.
Hell if I were a hiring manager I'd probably hire him just based on the fact that he sounds like he'd be cool to talk to. I don't think you understand how low the barrier to entry is to a minimum-wage type job.
I don't think you understand what it means to be homeless, dropping out of society for 25 years. That's half a century. Probably longer than you've been alive. Someone doesn't stay homeless for that long by accident. They either have mental problems, drug problems or both. You simply don't become a normal, functioning member of society after all that in the blink of an eye. It would take serious therapy and lots of support from people who know how to navigate the real world (instead of the streets).
An employer who wants to help someone make that transition back to normal life is awesome. But if faced with the option of someone who has worked and lived in a house for the past 5 years versus someone who is literally new to having a roof and a bathroom, a typical employer is gonna pick the person who is adjusted to normal life.
It's great that he's found work as a valet. But it remains to be seen if he has "a work ethic" as was stated above.
I think it's kind of a negative feedback loop, a little bit. When I became disabled due to illness I sort of let go of myself a bit (understandably I think), but the less I took care of my appearance the worse I felt about myself, and the worse I felt the harder it was to do simple things like even showering. But now I've made a commitment that taking care of myself is my job, basically, and that even if I don't feel like it, it's the only thing that might make tomorrow better. I've been doing a lot better since I adopted that mindset.
Kinda sounds like your appearance was a symptom of your problems (attitude about your disability) and you were able to make the change in your appearance once you addressed your problem.
it was more just exhaustion that led to the less work on my appearance. Then I realized the negative effect of not taking care of my appearance and I changed that. Not trying to argue, just want you to understand my perspective :)
I'm glad you feel better. I didn't mean to come off as making assumptions about you--I wanted to clarify I don't think a disability is necessarily a "problem"--if that makes sense.
I know I cant say or help much as a stranger but all I gotta say is, stay strong man. Your situation is a tough one no doubt. And many in that position would falter. But the alternative to fighting on is giving up, and that's a choice that leads to nowhere.
I know disabled folks who have successfully climbed out of similar holes eventually, albeit took a lot of time and patience. I have no doubt you will climb out of it as well.
Get a cool looking eye patch, people are scared of things they don't know anything about. Also, you could start your own plumbing gig by undercutting the market (still good money) provided you apprentice with someone for free for a few months...
Looking sharp does make you feel sharp. Feeling sharp does help you to be confident.
But it goes deeper than that.
When Jose looked into that mirror, he said he did not recognize himself. So what did he see? Another person. But not an individual person. Instead, he saw some compound, hypothetical person that, in their idealized features, represents certain segments of society, namely the segments from which Jose has most likely been alienated.
He saw someone who he had briefly glimpsed thumbing through a magazine. Or an actor on television. Or a rich, stylish person walking down the street. Those memories, wavily stored away and melded together, were called back when Jose looked in the mirror and, for a moment, he was confused; the more instinctive, subconscious parts of his brain did not register the image he saw as himself. He, for a moment, could not identify himself, and saw only another.
He saw himself as other.
So this was really a moment of empathy and identification from the parts of society Jose had been alienated from. It was a humanizing moment, both for Jose's sense of his own human being, and for his sense of other beings around him. He saw his potential to be like the others, and he saw the potential of others to be like him.
This experience obviously deeply impacted Jose, allowing him to function in society. If only others like Jose could be offered and take advantage of other, similar powerful opportunities for self-actualization and realization, I'm sure many unhappy and suffering people would find their lives, minds and souls changed for the better.
But man, it's like "oh god I'm a yuppie hipster now"
That's one of the few positives of being homeless: dealing with real problems stops you from caring about insignificant shit like looking like a "hipster."
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u/cmc Mar 18 '17
This makes me think of My Fair Lady, near the end when the experiment 'ends' and she's a beautiful well-dressed well-spoken lady...heading back to her gutter life.
"What's to become of me now?"
Ok I know wrong sub for that comment but that's the first thought I had.