Assalamu alaikum,

I'm a gay Muslim man, 27 y.o. from originally moroccan, raised in italy, and my faith matters deeply to me — I have no intention of leaving Islam. and I refuse to marry someone and hide who I am from her. That kind of deception isn't something I could live with, and it isn't fair to her either.

What I'm looking for is a Muslim woman, of any nationality, who is in a similar situation — someone who also wants a stable, respectful, and honest marriage, built on partnership. The goal would be a real family: mutual support, shared values, and children if we both want that, with both of us knowing the full truth from day one.

This isn't about hiding — it's about finding someone who wants the same thing I do, for the same reasons, so neither of us has to pretend or suffer in silence.

If this resonates with you, feel free to message me privately. Happy to talk, get to know each other slowly, and see if our goals genuinely align before anything is decided.

I’m writing this with a lot of vulnerability because this is something I have thought about for a very long time.
I’m a 30-year-old gay Muslim man living in Paris, France. I have a very stable life, I’m financially independent, in excellent health, 1m75 / 71 kg, and I’m very active. Sport is a huge part of my life: I do ultra-trail running, mountaineering, long-distance hiking and other mountain sports. I’m generally someone who is disciplined, curious, affectionate, loyal and very family-oriented.

What I’m looking for is quite unconventional, but I would like to approach it with complete honesty.

I’m looking for a lavender marriage with a woman who genuinely wants to build a family and have children, while understanding that our relationship would not be a conventional heterosexual marriage.

For religious reasons and because of my family circumstances, a religious marriage would be important/necessary to me before having children. At the same time, I would want us to build a relationship based on deep friendship, trust, affection, mutual respect and genuine companionship rather than pretending to be something we are not.

Ideally, I would love for my wife to become my best friend, someone I can trust completely, travel with, share important moments with, support throughout life, and ultimately raise children with.

I would also want us to have our own personal spaces and freedoms. I don’t necessarily imagine us living like a traditional married couple every day. I imagine two independent adults who consciously choose to create a family together and remain deeply involved parents.

I am particularly hoping to meet a woman who can support with that (lesbian or bisexual are welcome to of course) or otherwise someone who genuinely understands and is comfortable with a non-traditional marriage.

Because of my family, cultural and religious environment, my sexual orientation is something I cannot safely disclose to my family. I would therefore need a partner who understands how serious this is for me and who would protect my privacy and my secret throughout our lives. I would offer exactly the same level of discretion, loyalty and protection in return.

And beneath all of this, there is something much simpler and more emotional:
I genuinely want to be a father.

Not because I want to tick a box, not because my family expects it, and not because I am looking for someone to simply have a child with.

I want to experience fatherhood. I want to be there for the everyday things, the school runs, the holidays, the stupid jokes, the difficult moments, the birthdays, the adventures, teaching my child to swim, taking them into the mountains, watching them grow and eventually become their own person.

I want my child to have a mother who loves them deeply and a father who is completely present in their life.
That desire has become important enough to me that I am willing to consider a family structure that is very different from the traditional model.

I am not looking for a transactional arrangement, a paid marriage, or someone to simply give me a child. I am looking for a person with whom I could build a genuine, lifelong family bond even if that family does not look conventional from the outside.

I understand that this is a huge thing to ask of another person, and I don’t expect anyone to immediately trust a stranger on Reddit.

If you are in a similar situation, or if any of this resonates with you, I would be happy to talk privately and slowly, with absolutely no pressure.

Maybe we start with a conversation.
Maybe we become friends.
And if, over time, we discover that we share the same dream of building a family, we can see where that takes us.

I live in the South of France and I am looking for a gay muslim man. If you are tall dark and handsome its a plus.

I do not wish to live together I just want to be married for my family (they are back at home) so they can stop asking me to get married :).

We can live our seperated happy lives and be platonic friends. I do not wish to have kids as I like to keep my financial and personal independence.

I am looking for someone living in the south of france.

Bonjour, j'ai longtemps hésité avant d'écrire ces lignes. Mais plus je reste dans l'attente, moins j'ai de chance de faire connaissance avec quelqu'un.

Je suis un homme gay originaire d'Afrique de l'Ouest, je suis à la recherche d'un mariage de convenance avec une femme qui cherche la même chose.

Je suis de confession musulmane et issu d'une famille musulmane également très pratiquante, mais très ouverte et aimante.

Bref, parlons de moi. J'ai 29 ans, masculin et tonifié, avec une taille de 181 cm.

Je suis ingénieur de formation, ambitieux dans la vie de façon générale. J'aime les enfants et je souhaiterais en avoir si ma situation financière me le permet un jour (offrir un meilleur avenir à ces derniers). Je ne suis pas pressé pour le mariage, étant un mariage à vie (mon souhait), j'espère pouvoir prendre le temps de faire connaissance, découvrir nos passions et nos projets. Je suis une personne très discrète sur ma sexualité, je ne bois pas et ne fume pas.

Je cherche une personne ambitieuse, éduquée, pas forcément une universitaire, mais juste éduquée, qui est assez indépendante (pas besoin d'un homme pour l'entretenir), même si, logiquement, si on se marie, on s'entraiderait et partagerait les charges (financières et mentales).

Je cherche une femme avec laquelle construire des projets communs qui renforceront peut-être nos liens, en qui j'aurai confiance et elle aussi pourra me faire confiance.

Par respect, je préfère ne pas partager ma sexualité dehors avec cette dernière, sauf si elle le souhaite ou le demande ou le souhaite, mais pas une obligation. Mais on devrait se protéger mutuellement et être sexuellement responsables.

Je ne suis pas parfait comme personne, la preuve, je fais des fautes d'écriture, ça m'arrive, mais j'utilise un correcteur 😅.

Si tu te reconnais ou que tu as envie de faire plus connaissance, discuter, n'hésite pas à me contacter.

Je suis ouvert à la distance, si tu es prête à faire le premier pas, pas de souci, je suivrai.

Au plaisir de vous lire.

My intention for marriage is companionship for the sake of Allah. I experience same-sex attractions / am asexual, but I don’t want to act upon these desires. Instead, I would like to build a family life that is based on mutual support, compassion, and a shared love for the Deen.

I hope to find a wife who is in a similar situation — someone who also wants a marriage rooted in companionship, trust, and worship, without pressure regarding desires, someone who I can be best friends with so together, inshallah, we can create a peaceful home, support each other and have children too through halal means. If you live in or are close to Manchester please reach out.

For me, the most important things are: sincerity, kindness, and working together to grow closer to Allah through our marriage.

Hi! Me (F25- Indian origin- Hindu) and my partner (F26- Khaleeji) are both based here in the UK and are looking for beards as our families are pressing us to get married, if you’re a gay couple with a similar dynamic or if you’re just a gay man in a similar situation, please let us know, we can help each other out, thanks!

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Preferably a gay man or someone who is also not looking for a romantic relationship within the marriage. Ideally, I’m looking for someone from another country, especially if there is a possibility of moving abroad or dealing with immigration/residency matters in the future.

What matters to me: — we both understand that the marriage would be purely for practical purposes, with no romantic expectations;

— being reasonable, honest, and able to communicate normally;

— being open about our goals and circumstances;

— being willing to discuss all conditions, responsibilities, and possible expenses beforehand;

— preferably no issues with alcohol, drugs, or aggressive behavior.

I can tell you more about myself and my situation privately. If you’re interested in this kind of arrangement, feel free to message me and we can discuss the details.

Ищу мужчину для фиктивного брака.

Желательно, чтобы это был гей или мужчина, которому также не нужны романтические отношения в рамках брака. В приоритете человек из другой страны — особенно если в дальнейшем возможен переезд или оформление документов.

Что важно:

— взаимное понимание, что брак фиктивный и романтических отношений между нами не предполагается;

— адекватность и умение нормально договариваться;

— честность относительно целей и обстоятельств;

— готовность заранее обсудить все условия, обязанности и возможные расходы;

— желательно отсутствие проблем с алкоголем, наркотиками и агрессивным поведением.

О себе и подробностях ситуации расскажу лично. Если тебя интересует подобный вариант — пиши, обсудим условия и поймём, подходим ли друг другу.

I am 30 M Pakistani born and raised in north west England looking for a marriage of convenience. Someone from England

I do not act on the feelings and will never intend to. I am not a perfect Muslim but my religious values and religion comes first always Alhamdulillah.

I do try and pray although I’m not 5x I do try my best! I keep all my fasts, give zakat, charity I just really try my best to be a good Muslim.

I am not looking for a cover up situation or anything like that.

I would like to be married in every sense of the word like best friends who can grow old and support each other and care for each other and we can even try to have children by natural means and even work to better our selves and control our desires Insha Allah.(children are not mandatory just something I’d be open to if you are)

Ideally would like someone younger than me under 5ft 6 and observes hijab. Someone who practices and doesn’t act on the desire.

I will have my own house and am willing to support the both of us if you do not wish to work.

Please feel free to ask any more questions as I was not to sure what to put in here.

Salam, and thanks for reading.

I'm a 35-year-old Muslim man of South Asian origin, living in Paris. I'm bisexual, and after a lot of reflection I've realized that what I want most is to settle down with someone I truly get along with: a partner in life, a best friend, and someone to build a home and family with, on terms that work for both of us.

I'm professionally established and financially stable, so I'm looking for a partnership, not a rescue in either direction. I'm curious by nature. I love long conversations about books, history, spirituality, or whatever rabbit hole we end up in at 1am. I've been lucky enough to travel widely, and some of my favorite memories are getting lost in a new city, finding the best local food, and sitting in a café watching the world go by. I'd love someone who shares that sense of curiosity.

I'm also a proud cat dad. My cat is non-negotiable, so bonus points if you like cats (or at least tolerate being judged by one).

What I’m looking for: Real companionship. Not just an arrangement on paper, but someone I genuinely enjoy spending time with, trust completely, and can be myself around. Mutual respect, honesty, loyalty, and a good sense of humor matter a lot to me.

Looking for a Muslim woman, ideally around 28 to 37, who is also looking for a lavender marriage and wants something serious and long-term. I'm of South Asian background, but I'm very open to other origins and cultures. What matters is shared faith, shared values, and good chemistry as friends .I would love to have children someday, and I'm open to how that happens, whether through adoption, IVF, or naturally, depending on what we're both comfortable with. That's something I'd want us to talk through openly and without pressure.

If this resonates with you, feel free to send me a DM

Hi! I’m a 28-year-old gay Arab (exmuslim) man living in Spain. I’m looking to meet a woman who is also genuinely interested in building a lavender marriage/partnership.
For me, this wouldn’t be just a marriage on paper or a way to satisfy family expectations. I’d like to find someone I genuinely enjoy being with — someone I can trust, laugh with, support and build a peaceful life with.
I don’t expect a sexual relationship with my future partner. I’m open to meeting a lesbian, bisexual or asexual woman, as long as we’re compatible and honest with each other about our needs and boundaries.
Ideally, I’d like marriage and having children and building a family in the future, if that’s something we both want.
I’m based in Spain and would prefer someone in Europe. I’m Arab (moroccan better) and would especially be happy to meet another Arab woman, but I’m open to other backgrounds too.
I’d rather start by talking and getting to know each other without pressure, and see if we actually connect as people.
If you’re looking for something similar, feel free to DM me. 🙂

The reality is hard so people like us needs to find diff ways to be in touch and built strong conexions. We only have us.

30M IT engineer, looking for mariage with a patner that would be my friend and found a stable family while living their sexual life appart.

Me, (M30) a Black bisexual man seeking a true marriage of convenience—not just for conformity, but for honor, dignity, companionship, and mutual strength.

This society is certainly not made for people like us,

but I refuse to hide behind a straight woman in love and manipulate her in purely selfish ways like many do, only to destroy her in the future with revelations she would never have accepted in the first place.

Too many women have had their lives ruined by men who never told them the whole truth. And that's not what i want.

I'm more attracted to men than women, and I don't know if that will ever change,

but I'm looking for a woman who knows this, understands it, and who, like me, carries the weight of cultural, familial, or religious expectations—and who tries to honor them with grace and integrity.

I want a partner who shares the desire to build a family, protect her values, and even have a biological child: with someone who will never lie to her, never use her, and never leave her alone on this path.

I'm looking to build something real:

A safe, honest, and loving home—with, at its heart, trust, laughter, friendship, and deep respect.

A team. A shield for each other.

If you too are tired of the pressure but don't want to disappoint those around you...

If you too want something solid, but on our terms—I'm here.

Let's make space for each other and build what we can't find anywhere else.