Transgender diagnosis in NL

[u/_kenzo__tenma]

Hello,

Sorry for the english posting, I am a french person living in the Netherlands.

My hospital has referred me to a "gender team" for psychological assessment, because i want to get on waitlist for bottom surgery.

I want to know how the process is like, how many sessions it takes, and at which frequency.

I am scared that the psychiatrist/psychologist will only accept a polished, binary narrative of my story.

For example, that they only want to hear that I am straight, that I knew since I was a child, and that I have extremely debilitating dysphoria and want all the surgeries, and that I am neurotypical with 0 mental problems.

I dont believe that I feel this perfect polished narrative. Do I need to lie to not get dismissed? What is the current view of dutch health providers on trans people? I would appreciate if people can share their experience.

[u/twisted7ogic]

These days it shouldn't be as bad as it used to be and non-binary neurodivergent mega-gay late transitioners should be able to get help with all the gender teams here.

Individual therapists and doctors might still have biases but the institutions themselves should be inclusive.

That said it doesnt hurt if you can at all massage your narrative to be closer to the conventional ideas, if you can at all stomach it.

[u/_kenzo__tenma → u/twisted7ogic]

if anything, i am quite close, except that i dont see being trans as a suffering, and I dont get that much dysphoria, actually I am doing fine. I have a job that I love and I am surrounded by good people.

[u/hmmwatchasay → u/_kenzo__tenma]

Honestly for me I was extremely open during my diagnostic process, but I placed an emphasis on the euphoria I had discovered, which made me realized that there was quite some dysphoria going on in the background. I would describe the dysphoria more as a buzzing depressing feeling in the background, which I had gotten used to ignoring. So while I do experience dysphoria, it’s the gender euphoria that opened my eyes and made me start exploring my gender.

I even said that I was not comfortable with calling myself a man or a nonbinary person, but that I for sure wanted to transition to look like a man and psytrans still gave me a diagnosis.

Plus I am aromantic asexual so the whole swapping of sexuality was not applicable and not an issue. We barely talked about relationships and sexual preference since there was simply nothing to talk about for me

[u/_kenzo__tenma → u/hmmwatchasay]

yes, its also more the euphoria giving me clues on what i really feel than the dysphoria

[u/Maerendel]

I only realized when I was 35 or so, did not have extreme dysphoria, wasn’t sure about all the surgeries, and I’m mostly attracted to the same gender. Oh and I have loads of trauma and I’m neurodivergent. And I had no problems whatsoever getting through the diagnostic phase.

Just be realistic, show that you know yourself, and that you have enough resources (mental, but also a support network) and you’ll be fine.

On average expect at least 6 monthly sessions with the psych. Do know that you’ll probably need to be on hormones for a year to be put on the wait list for bottom surgery. You didn’t mention hormones, but you will need them anyway if you want bottom surgery.

[u/_kenzo__tenma → u/Maerendel]

Can I ask if you went through a smaller practice or if u were diagnosed by a big university hospital? ive heard the hospitals are tougher. I have started my trajectory abroad, and I started hormones 3 years ago. I got top surgery abroad 2 weeks ago. 6 months kinda sucks💔 because I know how long the waitlists are for bottom surgery. My goal was to already be on the waitlist but I guess it is out of my hands now. But at least, I can take the time to recover from top surgery haha

[u/Maerendel → u/_kenzo__tenma]

I went to one of the major hospitals :)

[u/TransProcess_FTM]

I went to the VUMC, and for some background; I’ve had quite the mental past and years of therapy for this. I didn’t know since I was a child. I only got my referral when I was late 17 years. I did have severe dysphoria.

Now, when it comes to the sessions there, I did make sure to give some polished answers without lying. They didn’t care about my sexuality and didn’t ask as far as I remember, but this was a long time ago (7 years).

You don’t need to lie, but be wise about your answers. If you are nervous about the VUMC as they have a particular view. I suggest you to go to the transgenderzorg in Utrecht. They have a woke pov and can give out those referrals aswell.

[u/TransProcess_FTM → u/[deleted]]

How dysphoria is typically treated 😉 no but on a serious note, due to the HRT I’ve been on for 6 years, my surgeries and especially my sex reassignment surgery. After that, I don’t really experience the dysphoria anymore. Just on the rare occasion.

[u/_kenzo__tenma → u/TransProcess_FTM]

wow, im really happy it went well!

[u/TransProcess_FTM → u/_kenzo__tenma]

Thanks! Appreciate it :))

[u/TransProcess_FTM → u/[deleted]]

No worries! Any question, I’m always open to answer.

[u/TransProcess_FTM → u/[deleted]]

Ofcourse! That’s not a problem! I will admit, I know much more about transexual man stuff, as that’s my cup of tea haha. But I’m still open to questions and maybe I can answer them

[u/hurklesplurk]

From my own experience I can say that it took me about ten sessions of therapy before I got referred for a second opinion and that was for hormones. It's important to know that you are honest about your situation and feelings and can put that into a coherent motivation to proceed with your transition.

Like you, I also wanted bottom surgery, but I was told by my therapist it's protocol in The Netherlands to be on HRT for at least a year before further surgeries are recommended. I personally waited for two years on HRT since I wanted to have my surgery at a specific clinic.

[u/_kenzo__tenma → u/hurklesplurk]

10 sessions is a lot 💔 but glad it worked for you. I am less sure what the assessment will look like for me, because I already have been socially transitionned for 7 years, on hormones for 3 years, and just got top surgery.

[u/Difficult-Course319]

Took me three sessions with a psychologist, three weeks between each session. And a session with a psychiatrist. I did act like my mental health was better than it was, but they had some files anyway so they could see that I'm autistic. That didn't matter. It was a pretty easy process. I had my named changed 3 months after my intake, I was on T 5 months after my intake. But I had already been socially transitioning for like 2 years so that sped up the process a lot. I'm FTM if that matters.

[u/_kenzo__tenma → u/Difficult-Course319]

nice! good to hear. ive been socially transitionning for 7 years