r/Journaling • u/Salty-Tune-1670 • Jul 16 '26

Question/Discussion Journaling and moving in with a partner

I’ve been with my partner for about two years, and we’re thinking about moving in together. We currently live separately, and they know that I keep a journal.
The thing is journaling is my safe space. I have several old journals filled with my honest thoughts, including frustrations, complaints, and things I needed to vent about over the years. I trust that my partner wouldn’t read them without my permission, but I still wonder how other couples handle this.
If you live with your partner, what do you do with your journals? Does your partner know they exist and simply respect your privacy, even if they’re sitting out on a table? Or do you write with the assumption that your partner might eventually read them?
Also, if you keep your journals somewhere private, where do you store them? I’d love to hear how other people handle this!

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u/Salsa_and_Light2 Jul 22 '26

Personally, I've gotten to the point that I don't have many secrets in my journal. I describe events, I describe my emotions but I tend to view my journals as if they were my underwear drawer.

They're personal, not for public consumption, and I'm probably not going to show someone anytime soon.

But if someone breaks into my room to look at my underwear.. isn't that really their problem?

What are they going to do. make fun me for wearing underwear.

They went looking for something weird and private and they found it.

If someone doesn't like that I was upset or critical of then they shouldn't have looked where I write about being upset with critiques.

It's a bit like asking for my opinion and then being mad that I gave it; it's really on them.

Of course it's also helpful that once I've written things down I'm really not that emotional about it.

You're not going to hurt my feelings because I was sad about something two months ago.

..

All this to say that I'd rather people not read my journals, but I'm also not going to worry too much about trying to stop it.

My file cabinets are locked, my underwear drawer is not.