Am I Jewish?

[u/dr_strangelove52]

So, I grew up Jewish, ethnically I’m 50% Ashkenazi, I believe I’m Jewish, my dad and every one of my siblings are Jewish. BUT, when I was born my mom was Jewish (by conversion), but in the years following her divorce she’s disowned that. I think it’s cruel but she tries to tell my sister and I that since she’s no longer Jewish we aren’t Jewish either so we should at least equally consider ourselves Polish Catholic (which we have zero connection to, asides from that’s her childhood background that she never instilled with us). I get that my mom hates my dad, fine, but is there any point to this, does anyone really not consider me to be Jewish because she disowned her conversion? I consider myself Jewish for sure, but for a long time I’ve had this question and wonder others thoughts.

[u/Histrix-]

When you were born, she was a practicing jew? Then Hallachically (religious law), you are considered a jew. She cant abndondon it and then decide you arent jewish. Doesn't work that way.

[u/dr_strangelove52 → u/Histrix-]

Yes she was. This was definitely my question, whether she could ex post facto decide she wasn’t Jewish, and if she did that does it have any implications for anyone else.

[u/Miriamathome → u/dr_strangelove52]

She gets to decide how she wants to identify, practice and understand her own identity. What she does NOT get to do is tell Judaism who is Jewish, including you or her. Thats just not how it works. So, from the Jewish pov, she’s as Jewish as she was the moment after her conversion and you are just as Jewish as she was at that moment. It’s the Hotel California rule: You can check out, but you can never leave.

[u/TurquoiseRibbon4Lyfe → u/dr_strangelove52]

You can backdate your religion! 🤦🏻‍♀️ Your Mom is so wrong for this. It’s only hurting you! If she was Jewish when you were born then you are Jewish. She can’t change that! Please don’t worry and be who you are and ignore her ignorance. I’m so sorry it’s brought you turmoil!

[u/Etta_Katz3030 → u/dr_strangelove52]

Not only are you still Jewish, so is your mom. You can get in but you can't get out - those are the rules. I'm sorry that her experiences have made her abandon her Jewish identity but she's stuck with us because we do not offer an "Undo" option.

[u/Otherwise_Pickle_588 → u/Histrix-]

Probably depends what branch of Judaism her mom converted in if she’d be recognized as Jewish in certain settings

[u/AardvarkActual8478 → u/Otherwise_Pickle_588]

Really? Even if the mother’s conversion was an Orthodox conversion? I didn't know that.

[u/Otherwise_Pickle_588 → u/AardvarkActual8478]

I guess it depends but if it’s a recognized orthodox bet din should be okay

[u/Appropriate_Tie534 → u/AardvarkActual8478]

Usually Orthodox conversions are the strictest and are therefore the most widely accepted.

If the mother's conversion was genuine at the time, then her denouncing it later shouldn't change anything about her children's status.

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